Do babies confuse hunger and tiredness?

[Al991]

My baby is 7 weeks and mostly breastfed. She wakes me up around 8am and has a really big feed, but without fail around 10 she will start fussing and giving hunger cues - hands in mouth, rooting, head butting. When I go to feed her she usually just feeds for a short time the starts to fall asleep. I will then rock her and pat her for a few mins and she’ll nod off into a nice deep sleep and nap for an hour or two.

She will also do this throughout the day sometimes, usually shortly after a feed when you wouldn’t expect her to be hungry. Same pattern - rooting and hunger cues given, a bit of crying and then drops off straight away.

At times when I’ve tried to feed rather than putting to sleep she often gets herself into a snacking cycle - never getting a full feed cos she falls asleep after a few mins on the boob. I should say she also gives tiredness cues at the same time (yawns, staring into space).

My question is - AIBU to put her to sleep when she does this rather than offering food? Would she sleep if truly hungry? I don’t want to starve my baby, the opposite is true - I’m trying to make sure she avoids the snacking cycle and gets good full feeds that nourish her. I also want her to get enough sleep!

Would she sleep if truly hungry

Yes, truly hungry babies can be very sleepy. Is she bright and alert at times? Is she gaining weight and does she have enough wet nappiess*?

At 7 weeks you just need to feed on demand. She is building up your supply, she has a small stomach and it's possible she's feeding for comfort - but at 7 weeks you need to offer that comfort.

Kindly, you are projecting adult behaviours around food onto a small baby that isn't old or sophisticated enough to have them. There's no such thing as a snacking habit in a tiny baby, there's no difference in her mind between wanting food and being "truly hungry" and she's not going to understand and learn the difference if you deny her food. She's nowhere near capable of that for months yet. She's displaying hunger cues because she wants food, it literally is nothing more than that.

I was always led by what my baby wanted. Sometimes that meant tiny feeds, sometimes massive feeds.

My baby does this too. I offer him the breast the second time and he'll fall asleep on it but sometimes he'll have a small second feed so I try to offer him a feed anytime I see cues.

Reading this back I can see it appears a bit mad. Just to clarify

• yes she is an alert, healthy and happy baby who is gaining weight and is well fed. I feed responsively and allow her to take the lead. When she asks for food she typically gets it straight away.
• I was advised to avoid the snacking cycle by a professional infant feeding worker who suggested that having lots of small feeds was hindering her from getting enough and to ensure she was hungry enough before feeding her so she is well nourished.
• my baby resists sleep A LOT and this can lead to becoming seriously overtired, screaming for food but unable to feed because she can’t stay awake. This can go on for 24 hours if I don’t break the cycle at which point she will be both starving and sleep deprived (I usually have to offer a bottle at this stage). It is very distressing to watch and not good for her to get to this point. A few weeks ago it was leading to weight loss too.

I totally agree that responsive feeding is the way to go, but sometimes it does backfire for us because it will lead to her not being able to get enough nutrition if and only if she is feeding instead of sleeping!

When you say she is taking a big feed at 8 and showing hunger cues at 10 are you saying she’s staying awake for those two hours? If so that is probably too long for a 7 week old baby and those hunger cues are actually overtired cues.

I’d aim for trying to get her to nap around 90m after the start of the big feed, so 9.30, aiming for an hour or two, and then doing another big feed around 3/3.5 hours after the first feed, so 11 ish.

At her age it’s a bit too long for most babies to stay awake 2 hours and they will be overtired and hard to settle at that point.

good luck.