Calling Hunker/Tiktok all bf Gurus, can you please ring my friend who is on the verge of giving up ?

[Oblomov]

Actually not my friend, but ....Just spoke to my bestfriend. Her friend, who we have always talked about , over the years, has always wanted children and has recently had her baby.
She is struggling with bf. Apparently she has very big nipples and the pump, sucks her whole nipple into the pump and she is getting little out.
She has been advise to top up with formula - I can feel myself shouting NOOOOOOOOO
He is feeding , falling asleep and then waking up 15 mins later - I don't know how long he is feeding for.
She was desperate for children for years. I think she is totally overwhelmed and has other medical probs going on. She is desperate to bf, but is on the verge of giving up.
I think she went to the NCT, adn the helped , but only with latch on.
Would you consider calling her.
Please CAT me andI can pass your details onto my bestfriend and then atleast she can call you/you can call her.
Is this o.k. ?
I think she is very vunerable and delicate - as we can all understand.

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Oblomov,Hunker has all the breastfeeding lines on her blog.Will link..

Here.Right hand side of the page.
Print them out for her.

Has your friend got the breastfeeding advice line numbers ?

If not they would be open now and helpful for her to ring. Right Hand Side of Page

Has your friend got the breastfeeding advice line numbers ?

If not they would be open now and helpful for her to ring. Right Hand Side of Page

Thank you moondog. I was just thinking that, thinking where is hunkers blog - I can't find it.
Then I thought, I don't know if this is just becuse I have become quite passionate about supporting hunker's ambition of supporting all mums who wnat to bf, I don't know if I am being a bit OTT here, but my bf;'s frined- called Sue, I think she needs to talk to someone - I think she needs that - do you know what I mean.

big nipples is a good thing as i have too and the mw said i certainly had breast feeding boobs!! i also had my nips sucked into the tube of a pump which bloody hurt, i was more successful doing it manually. if the baby is latching on correctly then she should have no probs and if baby is falling asleep which is quite commom then she has to wake the baby gently by perhaps removing an item of clothing which my HV suggested to me or by tickling the babies feet. thouhg bf is natural it has to be learnt for both parties and patience is required. i am still bf my 1 year old.

I was just scared that the NCT or whoever she heard it from encouraged her to top up
I know that Hunker can not phone everyone who is struggling, sorry that was unrealistic.
Let me look at your links and I will see which one may be best.

NCT won't be encouraging her to top up!
Lots of choice there.
Urge her to make that call!

I don't know whether than was an unhelpful midwife ( no shock there then) or someone else, but someone certainly did. And then the other group ( possibly at the hospital) were only interetseted in latch on.
Even the links on the left, say they are run by volunteers and they may not be able to tlak for long. I think she needs advice support, form someone very experienced, becasue she is getting lots of conflicting advice form every medical place she has gone - be that group , MW, GP or whatever.
Sorry, am I getting a bit het up about this ????

The numbers Moondog posted are trained volunteers, they study for years to do this to help mothers like your friend. They are likely to have far more relevent training than the midwifes and maybe the hosipital 'counsellor' (who might be trained and might not be, anyone can use the title counsellor)

I have rung the NCT number before and got great advice, I have heard good things about the other charities.

do you think she just wants to talk to someone who has experienced the same early feeding pattern for reassurance perhaps?

maybe you could ring for her, find someone who is available for her to speak to there and then (making sure she is available first of course), i do remember it was awfully daunting to make the call.

why is she expressing? is a bit early maybe, i think it is advised to get supply established and all going smoothly before onto this??

can she log onto mn? Tons of experiences like hers on here.

Oblomov, I do hope this mum gets help. Breastfeeding counsellors won't phone her, though - she has to phone them. This is how we work - we don't phone people at the request of a third party, as the only way we can be sure the mother wants to speak to us is if she does the asking

There is no way a breastfeeding counsellor would advise topping up i) because we don't give advice, but support and information ii) this is an intervention, and the suggestion would have to come from someone with clinical responsibility for her eg a midwife

If she found NCT helpful, then perhaps she can call them in again.

Feeding, falling asleep and waking 15 minutes later is fine and on the normal spectrum for a new baby. She does not need to tickle feet, jiggle, or whatever....this is hardly ever neccessary, and it risks annlying/upsetting the baby.

I hope she can call again!

Hope she gets some decent advice.
Just wanted to say that I too have big nipples and like bethoo was also told I had "good breatfeeding boobs" (or something along those lines). Big nipples I think often make feeding easier rather than harder, as its simpler for the baby to latch on.
I found expressing hard work - it also sounds like it might be a bit early for this news mother to be expressing, perhaps better if she can just feed the baby on demand to get her supply going?
I'd print off the numbers and also give her the details of the MN talk pages.

oblomov it depends on availability in your area, but one of the volunteers from the BfN came to my house when i was in a right old state, and then i went to hers a few weeks later. i've been on the phone to other volunteers literally for hours...they will talk to your friend for as long as she needs.
also if she rang around there will probably be a support group running somewhere over the next few days - can be a real life line

you could call the hosp where she had her baby and get the name and no of the infant feeding co-ordinator for her?