Please help, first time mum. 8wo still feeds every 2 hours, doesn't go long stretch at night

[LauraFTM]

Hey, I'm a first time mum and would love some advice or reassurance.

My baby girl is 8 week old, EBF, and still feeds every 2 hours... 24 hours a day.

I see so much of other babies going 3-4 hours at this age, and also getting a 'long stretch' at night. She sometimes will go 3 hours between a feed if I'm lucky!

I don't know if I should be pushing her to go longer and hold off feeding her when she wakes at 2 hours? My concern there is that she is only on 2nd centile, which I know can mean she's just petite (as I'm only 5ft2 myself and slim) but I don't want to encourage her to feed less often if she needs it. The HV wasn't concerned but my GP wants to check her weight again in 3 weeks. She seems to be gaining very slow.

At the same time, I've fed every 2 hours for the last 8 weeks and not sure how much longer I can keep it up. I've done some expressing but I don't get a lot when I pump. When I give her a bottle she will drink 3oz. But one pump sessions only gives me 1.5oz. So it takes me 2 rounds of pumping to give her just one feed. Again, exhausting for me!

Any help, advice, reassurance, anything welcome.

Please and thank you!

With all kindness, that's not a sustainable way of feeding - which I guess you are feeling! I know - I've been there.

Is there a reason you aren't breastfeeding? Baby might get more feeding straight from the breast. Expressing/pumping doesn't work for everyone weirdly.

Also, what kind of pump are you using? And when are you pumping?

How much does baby actually weigh currently?

Sorry maybe that wasn't clear, I am breastfeeding! I tried expressing to get some help but it wasn't working well.
She was 6.5 at birth (induced at 37 due to reduced growth) she's now 8.6. She lost a lot after birth (11% i think), we had latching issues and she had a bad case of jaundice so took her near 3 weeks to get back to birth weight.
Apart from her initial drop of weight 3 days after birth, her weight has always gone up but just very slowly it feels.

She comes off the breast herself, lots of big poos and wet nappies every day. Content, smiley and chatty after a feed. So she shows she's doing OK, but the scales and charts maybe not. And I wish she would fill up and go a bit longer but maybe that's just her and how she is?

Thanks for responding and any thoughts!

That sounds tough but really can be completely normal. Is she showing any signs of allergies? My only advice is going into survival mode. I found it harder with my first when I tried to fight and fix her sleep. With my second accepting that it's tough but not forever has made it easier to cope. Have you considered safely cosleeping? I managed to sleep through a lot of the feeds in those early days doing this and it maximised how much sleep I got.

Feeding every 2 hours at this age is quite normal. Her stomach is still very small (about the size of her fist) and she will eat little and often.

It is exhausting though. It’s can also help to know that what you express is no indication of supply. Some women just can’t express much. I never could get much out, but had better luck with a Haakaa pump. I could also do it while feeding so took no extra effort. That said, it sounds like she’d still want feeding every 2 hours even if it was from a bottle.

Some ideas you could try to help you to rest.

1. your partner does literally everything else. All nappies, cleaning, cooking etc is up to them. It means you can focus on feeding and sleeping

2. If she sleeps between feeds, what every time of day it is, have a sleep too.

3. help her with her rhythms by keeping your room darker during night feeds. With time this might help her go longer during the night.

4. if your partner isn’t at work, feed baby and let them take baby out for a walk while you sleep. You might find if she’s away from you she might go a bit longer.

Oh and on the weight thing - is she following her centile? If so, don’t be concerned. You said you’re petite so likely she is too.

Sounds perfectly normal to me. Babies digest breast milk quicker than formula and the feeding on demand is generally the advice for this age

she will go longer stretches in her own time. Try to rest when you can.

It sounds normal to me especially as you mentioned her weight at 8.6, thats still quite small so I'd expect her to be feeding a lot to bring her weight up. In my experience its when they start to get heavier that they sleep longer, rather than age. That being said, its hard when you need sleep yourself! It won't last forever. Are you offering both sides at every feed, even if she seems full after the first side?

Mine fed every two hours until he was ten months. He's 17 months now and occasionally does 5 hours overnight! I think you just have to go with the flow/

That’s very normal OP. My BF babies fed every 2 hours until we started weaning. They did go longer stretches overnight but not that young.

It's bloody tough OP 😩 I feel your pain. But it is completely normal 🥰 Try not to stress about lengths of time between feeds - just feed on demand and relax into it. If she's petite she may well just need little and often. Don't let medical professionals freak you out about weight gain - if she's overall gaining and flowing centiles don't stress. If you have pain or think she is struggling to latch (clicking etc.) it might be worth checking out for tongue tie (make sure it's a proper person who checks as most midwives and Drs don't know how to spot them) but otherwise just keep going - you are doing amazingly!

Re..night time - have you mastered lying down feeding yet? Do you co-sleep? These can be life savers as it allows you to doze and feed at the same time!

Personally I'd scrap the pumping as I found that and feeding pretty depressing and it sucks away your whole day in a cycle of milk production and isn't worth it! But we are all different! Don't compare yourself or your baby to others and you do you!

Xxxx

Sounds very normal. My 17 week old is still feeding every two hours round the clock.

What I’d say is if you’re really struggling, please don’t be afraid to give a bottle of formula here and there. It’s not the devil and it may be less stressful than pumping. If you don’t want to of course that’s absolutely your prerogative but the option is there. I remember stressing with my first to pump so he could take a bottle, this time around every so often I just give him some instant formula. Even just having it in the house makes me feel better as I know that if I really can’t face one more feed then the option is there, however it’s never actually got to that point.

As others have said what will really help is your DH doing as much as the other stuff as possible. Load up on ready meals and quick cook food, or food you can eat one handed. Don’t worry about the housework bar the bear minimum. Get out and about as much as you can, it makes you feel less like just a feeding machine. And I promise you this phase really will pass so much quicker than you think. Sounds like you’ve been doing an amazing job!

I know what I would do, but obviously very subjective!

I wouldn't worry about her weight as long as she seems well, is gaining even slowly, and lots of nappies.

Would try really hard to encourage big long feeds (cool flannel wash before hand, tickle feet and cheeks, vest only - unless it's very cold obvs) and start to push towards 2.5 hours in the day.

Stop pumping and give a bottle of formula if you find you need to. You could try again with the pumping later if you are v against formula. In which case you would do one pump after the morning feed.

Like everyone's said it is really normal at this stage but it's ok to start encouraging her in the direction you want.

I should have said big active feeds, 'long' doesn't necessarily mean active.