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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Feeling guilty about giving one bottle a day - will it be worth it

5 replies

Rooandtwo · 06/07/2023 16:43

Hello

I made a previous post about struggling to get DD to take a bottle at 8 weeks. I got great advice and switching from MAM to Lansinoh gave us hope as she started at least attempting to latch on it. Through gentle trying every day she will now take 60ml but she is still seeking out the breast afterwards and won’t settle - though 60ml is not a full feed she was seeking an alternative throughout my attempt today.

My husband will do the bottle feeding attempts when possible but it’s mostly me as he is at work until 6 and by then she is getting a little fussy and it doesn’t seem the best time. Consequently when she is being bottle fed there is a breast there and she wants it and is sometimes quite frustrated or upset that it doesn’t seem to be on offer. This is making me feel guilty and I’m questioning if this is all really worth it. We thought DH being able to give a bottle would mean I could go for a run etc. but now we are at 11 weeks, I’m wondering how much longer before that may be possible between feeds anyway? Currently I wouldn’t want to be out for an hour as she is quite unpredictable in how long before she will want another feed but she definitely is improving gradually. Might her inability to settle with a bottle improve as she gets more used to it?

The other thing is I’ll have to return to work 3 full days a week when she is a year old. At that point if I am still BF how often will she need the feeds? I have no idea how much breast milk a 1 year old is still taking. Can anyone advise on this to help me decided if it’s important to continue trying as I’m weighing up depriving her of what seems to be the only way she can settle after feeding/putting her through the frustration of learning, and the long term insurance of knowing she will still be able to have her breastmilk when I have no choice but to be away.

OP posts:
jellybe · 06/07/2023 16:53

If she will reluctantly take it when you are there I would just have them as stand by for when you aren't - like if you have gone for a run then DH has that as back up if she needs a feed whilst you are out.

If it is becoming frustrating for you and her I wouldn't keep pushing it - I found with my baby's that they never wanted a bottle from me as they knew the boobs were right there however they would take if from others if needed as a last resort if that make sense.

Unless you are wanted to stop breast feeding completely so need her to take bottles from you I wouldn't sweat it and would leave them as just something DH offers if that makes sense.

jellybe · 06/07/2023 16:54

Oh and meant today at 1 my younger two fed in the morning before I left for work and when I picked them up afterwards - they were happy through the day and eating solids by then and having milk from sippy cups - not bottles, and it wasn't an issue at all.

Good luck with it all the three of you will find what works best for you

Rooandtwo · 06/07/2023 17:29

Ok so I needn’t worry about the 1 year thing.

The impression I’m getting is that if you don’t get them taking a bottle and then keep offering one regularly they will refuse further down the line. Mind you I’ve also heard babies can take a bottle and then randomly refuse at 4/6/8 months so, maybe it’s not much of a muchness 🤷🏼‍♀️

OP posts:
jellybe · 07/07/2023 02:36

They might not take bottles later down the line even but then they can have sippy cups. Ultimately you need to focus on what is going to work for you now and worry about later when/ if there is a need to worry later.

Missscarletintheconservatory · 08/07/2023 01:38

My baby took a few bottles when very young but not after maybe 3 or 4 months.
I did try breastmilk in a sippy cup sometimes after weaning but it hasn't really been worth the effort.
In my experience it was definitely not worthwhile me trying to give a bottle when my boobs were right there.
Still breastfeeding on demand, now that I'm back at work part time DC doesn't take any other kind of milk, just feeds more when I get home from work.

I hope you'll be able to get out for a run soon, depending on where you go maybe DH could take the baby to the same park.

Wear a good supportive bra, my boobs get very heavy running plus full of milk by the end.

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