Feeds taking 1hr - tried almost everything!

[anniefear]

My baby boy was born 9lbs9oz

4 weeks - Breastfeeding was a problem (battle feeding) and started getting lots of wind.
Started pumping and giving him breast milk in bottle and some formula and adding colief.

6 weeks - fully on kendamil organic formula and colief which helped slightly

6-8 weeks - Crying patches at night, not settling and feeding taking 2hrs, so at 8week check got gaviscon for silent reflux, checked for tongue tie (told no tongue tie by health visitor and gp) and stopped colief as recommended by GP

8 weeks - Gaviscon worked slightly then stopped working so asked for omeprazole
Saw crainiologist and she said gaviscon had made his stomach in a knot which she sorted

9 weeks - Omeprazole worked, no crying stages and settled a lot better but feeding was still taking 2hrs

10 weeks - booked a private tongue tie midwife in desperation costing £200 and she confirmed thick posterior tongue tie which she snipped straight away - the next week was absolutely awful with only 2-3oz feeds at a time

11 weeks - feeding started getting better - now only (sometimes) taking 30mins -1hr to get a 6oz bottle down

12 weeks - saw crainiologist again and she stretched his jaw which was recommended by tongue tie midwife to help with him learning how to suck. Helped slightly but went back to taking 1hr to get a bottle down

13 weeks - still no improvement so decided to try holle organic goats milk (thinking it might be a cows milk allergy as his nappies were explosive and fairly sore and slight rash on his face) - he has been very settled on this and sleeping very well and maybe slight improvement with feeding but STILL taking 1hr.

He will take 3oz straight away and then won't have anymore until after 20-30mins and even then it's not the rest of the bottle straight away - it's half an ounce here and there under his play gym or in his cot etc.
He's now 14 weeks and it's taking so long to feed him that I hardly go out the house
He has one night feed which is an absolute dream - has 5oz in one go and back to sleep in 15 mins.
In the day, he feeds every 3-4 hours and should be taking 7oz bottles

Is this just my baby or am I doing something wrong? Feeding aversion? Tongue tie come back? More allergy? It just takes so long to feed him! He's a very big boy at 18lbs now so needs a lot of milk!
Thanks in advance x

I mean this kindly, but stop trying to force feed him. He shouldn’t be on 7oz bottles if that’s not what he wants to drink, I think 7oz is a hell of a lot of milk in one go for a potentially refluxy baby. If he takes 3oz then make up 3-4oz and let him drink that. Then leave it till the next time he’s indicating hunger and make up 3-4oz. Continuing to feed an oz every 30 minutes will mean he’s not hungry for his next feed properly.If he guzzles it all then make up another oz.
You might find he drinks more before and after a long sleep and less at other times. That’s fine, adults sometimes have just a drink, a drink and a snack, a small meal or a large meal.
Tongue tie can return so you could get that checked again, they will have explained that to you at the original revision appointment.
have you tried faster flowing bottle nipple?

I agree - try to relax OP and trust him to take what he needs. He's gaining weight so he must be getting enough!

Thank you! I think I panicked as the health visitor told me at 9 weeks that he needs 30oz every day at the very least so I've been trying to get that down him! Maybe he just doesn't need as much as she thinks?

Yes tried mam teat size 2 (10 days ago) and he got so much wind and screamed so went back to size 1

Yes exactly - they're all different OP. Honestly if he's gaining weight then the exact number of ounces doesn't matter. Remember if you were EBF you wouldn't have a clue how much he was getting!

All babies are different, when on formula the most by DD would have in one go was 5oz. Her weight gain has been fine and she's now 15mo so on cows milk (bottle in a morning and at night) and has only just started to finish 7oz. He will let you know if he wants more, maybe cut down to 4oz bottles and make up more if needed. I also stuck to size 1 teats after trying the 2 and like you DS was just giving wind/guzzling too much and making her sick. It's hard when health visitors tell you stuff as you feel you're doing it all wrong if baby isn't sticking to their 'norms' but you know your DS better than they do, just go with what he wants for now and don't panic about it xx

I’d try the size 2 teats again. The wind may have been coincidence as unless it’s coming out very fast and causing him to gulp, which seems unlikely with a size 2, he’ll be getting more air with a size 1 as he will have to suck so hard to get any milk. No baby will take 7oz from a size 1, it will definitely take hours! But also maybe he just prefers little and often, that isn’t a bad thing as long as weight gain is ok.

There’s also variflow teats with some bottle brands where they can control it themselves.

Sounds stressful. My advice is more about getting yourself out and about. Bring a made up bottle, a book/podcast/laptop and when he needs a feed take yourself off for a nice coffee and a cake. He can feed slowly while you chill out. My bf baby fed for an hour at a time too and it can be a nice time for you to zone out or whatever if you get yourself well set up.

Try a size 2 teat again. But pace him if he gulping too fast.

Have you tried side lying feeding? (Google it for pictures)

Keeping him upright after a feed for at least 20 mins.

And he will take what he needs.

(Just as an example. From a nicu nurse. We calculate baby's intake on a 24 hour basis and then divide it into 3 hour feeds and I did yours based on a weight of 8.5kg (18lbs) and 4-6 ounces each feed is plenty!)

He's gaining weight beautifully try not to stress!

Thanks everyone, I'll try size 2 teats again soon and give him smaller feeds more often! See how we get on! Thank you
I'm also comparing with my first who took 10mins altogether to take 8oz at this age! They're very different feeders!

My son could only do 3 oz bottles at that stage but he had them every couple of hours. All day all night.

I went to the hv as I was worried he wasn't reaching the daily average and the advice as aslong as he wasn't dehydrated and was gaining weight - he was fine. He often only had about 1/2 the daily amount but he held his growth line which was only 10th percentile - he still doesn't eat now!

"Gaviscon made his stomach in a knot" what a load of absolute bollocks. It would do no such thing.
You've been had!

Just trying size 2 teat and he kept pulling his head away and only had 1.5oz and now refusing more.
Its 3hrs40 since his last feed and he only had 4oz at that feed so he should be hungry?

My now 15 month old never drank more than 5 ounces. I kept being told by GPs he should be drinking more which caused me so much stress and anxiety and we came very close to giving him a bottle aversion.
He had terrible reflux and cmpa but he always put on weight and always tracked his centile regardless of how much he drank. He was just a little and often (every 3 hours ish) drinker.
I really wish I hadn’t focused so much on his milk intake. He drank what he wanted and knew when he’d had enough.

Thanks again for your reply - can I ask what milk he was on?
He's gone from refusing a full feed to screaming after half an ounce and I'm wondering now whether it's an allergy :(
Thanks x

@anniefear mine was initially put on Nutramigen and we saw an improvement until a couple weeks later when symptoms started coming back so he was put onto an amino acid formula Neocate and that did the trick.
He still had reflux because the formula is so thin but it didn’t bother him and symptoms like frequent, loose, mucusy nappies and dry, skin rashes disappeared.
It wasn’t until he could sit up unaided that the reflux went away even though we tried gaviscon, carobel, omeprazole (everything) and he still would only drink 3-4 ounces at a time but became a much happier baby.
when he turned one we moved him to oat milk. We’ve tried to reintroduce milk but sadly for now he still can’t handle dairy as the bad nappies came back.
If you suspect a bottle aversion then they recommend offering a feed, trying once more 5-10 minutes later if didn’t take much and then leaving it until next feed no matter how much they have drank. Trust they know when they’re thirsty.
I don’t think it will be a tongue tie issue. We had a breastfeeding specialist and health visitor say he had a posterior tongue tie but when we got referred to the tongue tie clinic they said he didn’t have one. By that point I had basically given up trying to breastfeed and turned to formula. We’ve never noticed him have any feeding issues since getting the right formula and he can stick his tongue out fine so I’m still unsure what the situation was with any potential tie but if there was one, it didn’t affect him feeding from a bottle.

DD (20 weeks) had a tongue tie and silent reflux. It’s brutal. She is also a stunningly slow feeder - it’s really hard to play with her because I try to keep her upright after a feed, but then it’s practically back to nap and her next feed. It feels relentless. Same as you though, a night feed is easy peasy. I wonder if she associates the bottle with pain, and she sort of tenses up when she is awake enough to make the association? I do try to go to a group or something most days though - I stick to the cheaper/free council ones so I’m not too resentful if I spend the whole one feeding! You won’t be the only one with a crying/feeding baby.

Here are a few things that I have tried that seem to be helping

• offering half a feed at a time. This was recommended by GP and HV. You still spend ages feeding, but it’s more comfortable for them.
• not responding instantly if she cries out in what I think is hunger. I’m not an advocate of leaving them to cry, but there were times when I thought she was hungry so was trying to feed her, but it wasn’t helping. By distracting her with toys etc, she generally stopped crying and then wouldn’t show hungry cues for another half hour or so. This meant she was hungry enough to have a bigger feed.
• similarly if I offer a feed and she isn’t interested, we stop and do something else
• tummy time before feeds so that she has time to digest her milk
• offering a dummy for naps - I read online that this can help with reflux because sucking is more comfortable for their stomach. I don’t want a baby who is permanently relying on a dummy, so we use it for naps
• MAM bottles gave DD horrific wind (both teat sizes, tried at different ages because I really wanted them to work). I saw a lactation consultant for combi feeding who recommended Lansinoh, and she also got on fairly well with Medela.

Sending you my sympathies - it’s so frustrating.

This sounds exactly like my son, screaming during feeding, taking up 2 hours to finish a bottle, explosive nappies and very refluxy. He ended up (and still has) a severe cows milk allergy. He ended up on an amino acid formula (alfamino) and was like a different baby. Once on it, I couldn't believe how easy it was to feed him!

If it is a cows milk allergy, goats milk formula won't be suitable as the proteins are similar. You'll need a prescription formula but I think it's well worth pushing for it