poor supply? sorry, a bit long

[weasle]

i am breastfeeding my 9 week ds2, but findng it a bit difficult.

he feeds constantly, and never seems 'satisfied' after a feed. He wants to feed all the time. He has lots of wet nappies and poos about once a day. i can only express tiny amounts. I am co-sleeping, sling-wearing and even drinking fennel tea (yuck). His weight gain is not great

Is he just a snacky feeder or am I 'starving' him by my stubborness not to give formula?

My ds1 went from 90th to 2nd centile when i bf, then put on a pound in a week after i topped up with formula reluctantly at 3 months, but he quickly started refusing the breast, so i see top ups as the end of bf.

An ideas? thanks

weasle, it's not a good feeling when you think your baby may be not doing as well as he might.....

It's not possible to say from your post what's going on....'constant' feeding needs a bit more definition, as does weight gain that's 'not great' - can you post again?

Your perfomrance at expressing is irrelevant - really, it says nothing about how much you produce or how much your baby takes.

Snacking is on the normal spectrum.

Has anyone seen you feed - I mean someone who knows what to look for? Sometimes a slight amendment in how the baby takes the breast can make feeding happier and more satisfying. Have you tried baby-led attachment positions? Has he been checked for tongue tie? Is he different at night? What happened in the early days?

Lots of questions

thanks tiktok.

my ds1 had tongue tie divided at 2 weeks; ds2 does not have it.

latch has been looked at by a nice bfc and seems ok. he feeds for sometimes 10mins, sometimes up to an hr on and off, it's quite variable. at night he can go 3-4 hrs between feeds eg midnight to 3-4 then to 7 but not every night.

in the first couple of weeks he had the occasional bottle of formula (he had jaundice and i wanted to keep him hydrated to avoid phototherapy as it was miserable with ds1)and wt gain was fine. then only put on 4oz in 2 weeks. last week 7oz which is ok but drifting down silly chart

if snacking is normal that is reassuring. i think the main problem is lack of confidence caused by trouble last time, but things were different then (anaemia, pnd, tongue tie etc, none of these this time). constant comments from family, friends, any passers-by that baby always hungry and not being 'filled-up' properly doesn't help! or 'he isn't due a feed again is he, you've just fed him' etc. i find all that slowly eroding my faith in what we are doing.

Aha....I think this is a confidence issue, from what you say

He's not feeding 'constantly', is he? His longest gaps are at night, which prob suits you .

Feeding sometimes for 10 mins and sometimes up to an hour on and off is normal - and it isn't 'constant'.

Your weight gain report sounds normal, too....I don't see what's wrong with 11 oz over 3 weeks.

If you have a baby who is basically happy as long as he is on or near the breast a lot of the time, and whose growth and health give no cause for concern, then this is not a breastfeeding problem, as far as I can tell

You do have a problem with unsolicited comments and being bothered by them - family, friends and passers-by!!! Yikes. You'll know from experience how little they will know and understand about breastfeeding, so it will help to build up a thick skin against them!

thanks. sorry, perhaps being silly about it all!

'a baby who is basically happy as long as he is on or near the breast a lot of the time' - perfectly describes him. i have my mum staying and she can't understand why he is on and off the breast and i can't leave him to do anything. i quite like it though, and have minimal desire to do the cleaning etc! you are right, nights are good, am lucky there.

thanks for reassuring me

weasle, all of us get a bit 'silly' from time to time and find our confidence wobbles about a bit

I think it must be especially hard with a mum around all the time, who maybe has limited understanding of what a normal baby does.

Your baby is lucky to have a lovely relationship with you, with someone who prefers holding him rather than cleaning

This closeness and responsiveness is a wonderful start for him, really important to his future self-confidence and emotional well-being....babies who are cared for responsively like this cry/whinge less as they get older (there's some good research on this) because they have had their needs met when very young.

What's not to like?

So glad to hear all of this. Describes my DS (4 months) very very well too. All my instincts are to respond, feed him when he wants (even if some days he seems ridiculously hungry) and my confidence often gets knocked by people telling me that I feed too often / am too tied to him / am spoiling him etc.

that's nice to know nismy. i suppose some grown-ups are more grazers in their eating, but our society seems to think a baby will only feed every 3-4 hrs!