How long before can express and let others bottle feed?

6 replies

Torkijo · 18/02/2008 21:24

My wife is currently breastfeeding our 5 day old daughter but this has led to huge amounts of jealousy from our 3 1/4 yr old son, any thoughts on how long my wife should continue to 100% breast feed before expressing and letting me & our son help feed to better engage our son and also to give my wife a break?

OP posts:

rascal1979 · 18/02/2008 21:32

I've been told it's best to wait 6-8 weeks so that baby is properly established....
Could you and your son get involved with nappy changing or winding her?

Original poster

Torkijo · 18/02/2008 22:04

Trying that but its not helping as little one is feeding every 2 hours so wife is not able to spend any real time with son by themselves - so son is just getting more and more jealous

OP posts:

JingleyJen · 18/02/2008 22:10

So this is your moment to shine... Make daddy time the coolest thing in the world, you can support her feeding by making sure that your little lad's envy doesn't make her feel bad about breastfeeding.

You won't be able to do it at every feed but an afternoon at the swings with your son will be great for him and great for your wife.

IMO day 5 is too soon your son will calm down it is a huge change for him.

With my DS2 I fed him but Dh burped him / changed nappy and put him down whilst I did something with DS1 - a jigsaw just the two of us or some drawing.. something NOTHING baby related.

Does your DS1 go to nursery school? play groups? his normality is important to him so as much as you feel you can do with him (even if Mum normally does it) can really help.

Good luck, it will get easier, try not to pressure your wife to let you help with feeding, there are a million other things you can do.

fingerwoman · 18/02/2008 22:16

torkijo it does get better.
my ds1 was quite jealous of ds2 when he was born.
I have unfortunately NEVER been able to get him to take a bottle. he is now nearly 4 months. so ds1 has had to put up with it really. but he is getting better.
when ds2 is sleeping I make sure I have a special time with ds1 where we do an activity of his choice and he has my full attention.
he doesn't like helping with the baby (though is move involved as he is getting bigger) and he does NOT like being referred to as the "big brother"- think it's all too muich for him tbh.

he'll get there though, bottle or not. it'll take him time to get used to the fact that the new baby is here to stay, and that things are going to be ok and you still both love him. it's hard when so much time is spent on a new baby, but he'll get there eventually

Original poster

Torkijo · 18/02/2008 22:16

Thanks, i agree with daddy time and am making the most of it, and i already do all the cooking etc.

The problem is I am back at work soon and would like to try and at least start getting this fixed before my wife has them both to look after at same time -Son goes to nursery 3 days a week but at the moment is screaming not to as he doesnt want Mum & Daughter by themselves at home whilst he is at Nursery.

Fun the 2 parent game isnt it!

OP posts:

JingleyJen · 18/02/2008 22:29

Parenting is always fun, just wait until they are wanting to go to the disco or nightclub!!

I really believe that once he gets out of the house into his normal environment with his friends he will realise the whole world doesn't revolve around the new baby. Does your wife get chance to spend time with your son at the moment? book at bedtime? special afternoon time? I am sure you are all tired as well so things can seem even worse when you are feeling exhausted.

Huge congratulations to you and your wife.

Flip