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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Why is my baby still starving after breastfeeding?

30 replies

TheBeesKnee · 13/05/2023 09:45

Baby is 8 days old.

I had a lot of trouble getting him to latch and it was only after getting nipple shields that he started latching and feeding for good periods of time.

However, he will scream blue murder until we give him formula afterwards.

Yesterday he fed for 1 hour on one breast and 10 minutes on the other. Still wanted a top up.

The day before he did 40 and 20 minutes, same story.

I am also pumping but not getting enough to feed him a whole bottle. The most I can get is 30ml, which is basically his "starter".

I was under the impression that babies got more milk from the breast than we can pump?

I'm feeling very confused and down about it all.

OP posts:
namechange1986 · 13/05/2023 09:49

The more you top up the less your breasts will produce. Let baby stay on and suck rather than top up. Sometimes they will cluster feed and want on for hours at a time.

Danikm151 · 13/05/2023 09:50

Has baby been checked for tongue tie?
This can make it harder for them to feed, also his latch may not be right.
I’d reach out for some breastfeeding support to see if you can get some advice in person

bibbingo · 13/05/2023 09:50

Clusters feeding is very normal (and exhausting!). If you don't want to top up with formula, just put baby back on the breast.

Original poster
TheBeesKnee · 13/05/2023 09:52

Danikm151 · 13/05/2023 09:50

Has baby been checked for tongue tie?
This can make it harder for them to feed, also his latch may not be right.
I’d reach out for some breastfeeding support to see if you can get some advice in person

He has, no tongue tie found. I'm using the nipple shield because I have flat nipples and they don't protrude enough.

OP posts:
Original poster
TheBeesKnee · 13/05/2023 09:54

bibbingo · 13/05/2023 09:50

Clusters feeding is very normal (and exhausting!). If you don't want to top up with formula, just put baby back on the breast.

He reaches a point where he just cries, screams and pushes away from the breast. I feel like I can't really force him and it seems cruel? It's very distressing to hear him crying like that.

If milk supply is slowing down, maybe I could pump more frequently to mimic the cluster feeding?

OP posts:
Houseupdate · 13/05/2023 09:55

For me feeding an hour each side was normal at this age. Your baby needs to feed to build your supply.

icclemunchy · 13/05/2023 09:55

Has anyone shown you how to pace bottle feed? Bottle feeding is passive (if you tip the bottle upside down milk flows out) and as long as the milk keeps flowing baby will keep drinking to avoid choking. Pumping 30ml at this stage is a really great amount but you'd be better off popping baby back on the breast. It's much less effort for you.

Are you putting him down after a feed? It may well be he's yelling about that if so rather than coz he's hungry. Deffo seek out some skilled support though. Do you have a LLL group nearby? Or you can ask to see the infant feeding coordinator who should have more training than your hv/midwife

Seeline · 13/05/2023 10:00

Are you winding him after each breast?

Original poster
TheBeesKnee · 13/05/2023 10:05

@icclemunchy we have the slow flow teats for this exact reason as recommended by midwives at the hospital. I was in for 5 days so got a LOT of 121 support from midwives, lactation consultants and a matron.

In fairness he was not breastfeeding in hospital as I only got the nipple shield when I left so I haven't had a chance to ask about this. There's a virtual clinic on Tuesday that I will attend and ask.

We've been trying to cuddle him after but the screaming and thrashing around makes it difficult.

@Seeline yes I do, sometimes mid feed too if he's going for ages.

OP posts:
sandberry · 13/05/2023 10:07

Is he actually drinking well on the breast? He should, after an initial burst of fast sucks be settling into a rhythm of swallowing every 1 to 2 sucks, if he’s swallowing more like every 4,5,6 sucks then there is an issue with either how he is transferring the milk (most likely) or supply.

A baby can suck for an hour or two with minimal swallowing and still be hungry and in need of milk or they can suck for 10 minutes and be full and comfortable. It’s how effective their feeding is that matters. Your midwife should be able to help you with this or if not refer you onto specialist infant feeding support.

Aquamarine1029 · 13/05/2023 10:11

I would stop the pumping and the formula. Your baby isn't nursing enough. Cluster feeding pretty much goes on all day at this stage to build up your supply, and pumping isn't as effective.

Makingamess4212 · 13/05/2023 10:12

My DS is 6 weeks old and I feel like he's been on the boob since he was born ! Its exhausting but it's definitely to help with your milk supply, and definitely worth it. I managed to persevere, now he can go about 2 hours between feeds, but on an evening he cluster feeds like mad and can be on the boob from 6pm till around 10/11pm ish.

Definitely wind him after each boob, I've found DS gets really frustrated and pushes away when he has wind, which confused the hell out of me, but it's just a burp ha.
I change his nappy half way through a feed now, cause he tends to pee/poo alot while feeding, so it helps keep him settled.

If I was you I would stop the pumping, and stop the formula if you can.
I tried pumping for the first time the other day, and our routine was all out of whack, and after a bottle he just didn't take the breast as well as usual.. He will live on the breast for a few weeks! But it's so worth it.

If you want to add formula that's fine, just sounds like there's a lot going on and little one might be confused..

OwlsRock · 13/05/2023 10:19

This is all about regulating your supply.
Ditch bottles and just bf. Be prepared to do nothing else. Skin to skin also.

It will rapidly up your supply and get it sorted.

Every formula bottle is causing a reduction in your supply.

It's really hard work to start with and you are right at the start. Bear with it if you can.

JessieLongleg · 13/05/2023 10:26

My baby is a big eater and he would breastfeed for 3 hs at a go. He screams like he is starving even the other day he is shouting out outside why I'm trying to do something he had only fed 90mins ago . People giving me looks lol. i had problems at the beginning as well. Slowly cut out the bottle. The pump is misleading for example the other morning in hospital I pumped 100ml but my husband fed him 400ml formula. You can't compare the ml and babies digest better on breast milk. Milk supply increases quickly.

Babies can prefer the bottle as can drink quicker I kept him on the teat that mimics breast feeding till 4-5 months. As didn't want him bored of breast feeding.

Mummy08m · 13/05/2023 10:28

You need to keep alternating breasts to raise supply, rather than 1h on one before switching. Literally 5-10mins max on one, then switch, repeat. 3x on each side should do it.

hippopotterus · 13/05/2023 11:05

My milk didn't come in fully until I'd allowed baby to constantly feed. Felt like a milk machine by the end of it but that's effectively what you want!

PurpleCat88 · 13/05/2023 11:06

When my daughter was born we had lots of problems feeding. We had to go back to hospital as she wasn't getting enough milk. Then we had to give formula / expressed milk top ups after each feed (exhausting!!). Just putting her to the breast for hours and skin to skin wouldn't have worked as she would have lost weight / become dehydrated again.

Anyway... if there are no weight loss concerns and you are getting plenty of wet nappies then just breastfeeding and skin to skin will up your supply and give baby what they need. Keep a close eye on nappy output though!

If you do need to go down the pumping route to top up as well, then I would recommend a hospital grade double pump (I had the spectra s2) and power pumping. This is where you mimick cluster feeding, so pump for 20 minutes, 10 minutes break, pump for 10 minutes, break for 10 minutes, final pump for 10 minutes.

I was eventually able to ditch the top ups, but it took a few months (Confused) but I had to reduce top ups slowly so my supply naturally increased over time. She's over a year now and I'm still breastfeeding Smile

I hope you don't have the issues I did and you're able to feed your baby exactly how you want, whether that be exclusive breastfeed, mixed feeding or bottle feeding - good luck!

hippopotterus · 13/05/2023 11:08

Oh my babe also had tongue tie but I still exclusively bf and most definitely didn't affect supply but baby did feed better after it was fixed so I agree to investigate that. Unless your baby is at risk of losing weight I'd reduce, or take away, the bottle temporarily until feeding is properly established

buonnatale · 13/05/2023 11:28

Face to face support from an IBLC is likely to be more helpful than various bits of advice from well meaning posters on here. I know it's hard though, especially in these early days.

NCT often do free feeding drop in clinics too.

Bananabreakfast123 · 13/05/2023 11:42

Baby is currently 5 weeks old and I had similar issues. He was small and struggled to latch so a nipple shield was recommended by the infant feeding team. He'd enthusiastically latch on to the nipple part and spend hours feeding. It was completely exhausting and he never seemed satisfied so I contacted the infant feeding team again and it turns out that whilst he was going on and sucking for ages, he wasn't feeding effectively so he'd be coming off and screaming for more. I'd then top up with expressed milk. The infant feeding team showed me a different position and I've also since ditched the shields and feeding is going so much better although still room for improvement.

I've been pumping since the beginning to help build and maintain supply until baby could feed effectively and have used that to top up. I hired a hospital grade pump and it's been great. I need to express far less regularly now feeding is improving but is useful for any time we need a bottle to feed or when I need to express for comfort.

I spent a week in hospital and had a lot of one to one feeding support but I was told it can take new mums 10-12 weeks to really establish effective breastfeeding and it's been really helpful to keep in touch with the infant feeding team as different issues have arisen.

Original poster
TheBeesKnee · 13/05/2023 13:16

He lost 8.8% of his birth weight and I think was a bit dehydrated. He developed a very dry cry and was putting out maybe 1-2 wet nappies.

I was trying desperately hard to breastfeed but he just wasn't latching. I was asleep deprived, stressed and couldn't stop crying myself. I'd had maybe 4 hours of sleep and a couple of naps over 3 days.

In the end at 4am on night 2 or 3 I think a midwife and DP convinced me to give him formula. I really felt like I had no choice with him not latching. I was trying to hand express and we were giving him 1ml syringes at a time. Looking back now the poor thing was starving for 3 days. He demolished 75ml formula and fell asleep immediately.

I've tried all the positions. He has successfully latched without a nipple shield with both of us lying down twice and sitting on my leg maybe 3 times. Rugby and sideways belly to belly does not work. There have been a number of occasions where he will suck 2-6 times and then push away, cry, not latch, get more and more distressed.

I think I do need to accept that I'm in for the long haul and I'm going to give power pumping a go @PurpleCat88

The lactation team have put together a plan for me:
Pump at least 8 times per day.
Offer him breast first and at every break.
As much skin to skin as possible.

I will ask at next week's clinic as well, I was just wondering if others had experienced this and had any tips.

OP posts:
PinkPlantCase · 13/05/2023 13:19

Aquamarine1029 · 13/05/2023 10:11

I would stop the pumping and the formula. Your baby isn't nursing enough. Cluster feeding pretty much goes on all day at this stage to build up your supply, and pumping isn't as effective.

This. If you want to breastfeed then just just have to keep at it. It’s relentless for a time as baby builds up your supply and learns how to feed.

sandberry · 13/05/2023 13:31

Please ignore the advice about just stopping top ups and just breastfeeding. This is dangerous advice in many cases and should be discussed with a health professional who knows your individual situation at least.

It sounds like you really need face to face advice from someone who can evaluate what is going on. I’d try and find someone to do a good oral assessment, did they rule out tongue tie using a tool and give an actual score or just look briefly. Have they evaluated his suck? , did you have a difficult birth? Is he able to move his head normally, eg can he throw it back and gape widely? Does he have a one sided preference? Is he eliciting the milk ejection reflex on the nipple shield or is he not really drinking at all? The best interventions depend on a really good individualised assessment. Your hospital might well employ an IBCLC, ask to see them.

In the meantime, keeping the baby well fed and maximising supply are the key, if you have a well fed baby and plenty of breastmilk, breastfeeding will almost always come.

bussteward · 13/05/2023 13:35

Burp him like your life depends on it: no one warns you how fussy they can be at the breast (nor that “fussy” is code for thrashing like a spawning salmon). When they’re arching away it’s so often wind or a stuck bit of posset they need to get up. Glad there’s a plan!

CurlewKate · 13/05/2023 13:44

At this stage you really need to be sitting (or if you can lying down and just feeding. You're still building up supply. It's relentless-but you will get there. Your nipples don't need to protrude, try without the nipple shields and see if he can latch without them. I really wouldn't pump either-it's too early. Remember to drink plenty yourself. Sounds like you're doing a fantastic job-it's early days.