How do I go about giving up breastfeeding?

[Louise76]

My baby is nearly 10 weeks old and I want to give up breastfeeding slowly and sensibly(for many reasons - I'm exhausted, my weight is plummeting as I find it hard to find time to eat, I'm starting to get depressed as I really need a break from my baby, my baby wants to feed all the time during the day, I'm not keen on feeding in public, I feel as if my body is not my own etc etc etc)

She has been having a bottle of formula every day for the last week (in the evenings) to give me a break)and has absolutely no issues about taking a bottle I thought the best way would be to replace a feed a week with formula or EBM as I have a large supply in the freezer.

Do I just have to put up with sore, engorged breasts? Is there a risk of developing mastitis? There is so little info around as I there seems to be an enormous pressure to carry on breastfeeding .

Replies would be appreciated but please don't tell me to keep going as I think it might send me over the edge knowing that it will be like this for the next 4 months.

You must have thought about this a great deal and it must be really difficult.
I stopped very suddenly, I just decided that I'd had enough and gave him a bottle. This ment that my breasts were VERY sore and very full so I don't recommend that you do this. The best way is to cut out feeds one by one, as your baby sucks, your breast sends massages to your brain telling it to produce milk, so it does. The more your baby feeds, the more milk it makes so to stop, you need to start cutting out feeds. You may feel a little full, mastitis is an infection of the milk duct, if you had this your breast will be very full, very painful and hot to touch. Your GP can prescribe medication to dry your milk up aswell if you beg.
It does not sound as if you enjoy breast feeding, which is ok, no one should moan at you for this. You should be aware that it does get better though. At around 7 and 12 weeks your baby will be going through a growth spurt and will want to drain all of the milk it can. When it's a bit older (a few weeks), it will settle down into a routine and you will be able to get some of your life back. You have given it the best start you can by feeding it for this long and you should be proud that you have made it this far. To be honest with you, it won't be like this for the next 4 months but you should be really proud of what you have already achieved.

Thanks for your reply, Avenanap. Hope you don't mind asking but how old was your baby when you gave up and did you have the same reasons as me for giving up?

Well done for making it to 10 weeks, that is a great start for your DD. Great that you know she will take a bottle already as that relieves some of the stress.

When I gave up with mine I dropped one feed for a whole week which gave my boobs time to adjust, then dropped another feed the next week. Don't know if this is the "right" way but it worked for me. I did give up later than you - but not sure if that really makes much difference. If she is already having a bottle in the evenings maybe you can drop a feed late morning ish next (so the feeds you are doing and nicely spaced out). This might also be good as I found it was the one where I was usually out of the house and so nice if you aren't keen on feeding in public.

Weight loss and exhuastion are obviously quite normal so I don't want to panic you, but you could also get your thyroid level checked at GPs (simple blood test). I had post-partum thyroidistis and felt AWFUL with similar symptoms. I had had previous thyroid problems so it is pretty unlikely, but if you really feel bad it is a quick thing to check and easily treated if that is the case.

HTH and good luck.

friends who dropped a feed a week didn't suffer any discomfort

He was 1. I stuck with it, the first few months were really hard, I ended up topping him up with formula because he used to feed so much I became very tired and lost 2 stone. I liked feeding him though,it was nice to have this time with him and to bond. You have to do what is right for you though. I can't remember much of his first year because I was exhausted. There are alot of people out there that will try and talk you out of it. Do what's best for you. It's not easy trying to care for a small baby when your exhausted but my ds did settle and get into a routine.

hi - well done for getting to 10 weeks!

I have just stopped breastfeeding (last one yesterday) and I thought I would drop a feed a week - in reality was able to drop a feed every 4 days as my body adjusted much quicker than I expected - but i have stopped much later.

Defo drop a feed at a time and give your body to adjust - you dont want to risk mastitis on top of feeling tired.

On the dropping weight/ tired front - second the advice of the other poster who has suggested you get other things checked i.e. thyroid.

Glad to see such helpful advice - I gave up with my first at 4 1/2 months after huge stress but this time the breastfeeding is all going well but am back to work in 6 weeks when ds will be 13 weeks and so will be in same situation of giving up. Understand the guilt but also know in the end a happy mum makes a happy child! good luck!

I am currently dropping breastfeeding as I return to work in 2 weeks! DD2 is 4 and a half months. I understand how you feel, (I too have suffered guilt and exhaustion) well done for making it to 10 weeks and being sure of your decision- it is important to look after yourself.

Agree that 1 feed a week is the right thing to do, although I had very sore blocked milk ducts on and off for the first couple of weeks. A breast pump definitely has been helping me to take the edge off engorgement.

Hope it all goes well.

With ds1 I gave up bf at 10-12 weeks. I changed one feed from bf to ff every 3 days and managed to avoid any engorgement, soreness etc at all.

I took 2 and a half weeks to drop all BF feeds and move slowly to formula. After first week I had a lot of pain and hard lumps under my nipples. This still hasn't gone away completely after 1 week on formula. I am also still leaking a little. Thought it would all be over by now.