Donating milk - ethical concerns

[Merrow]

I have a large freezer stash of expressed milk as my baby was in NICU for 3 months. He's now exclusively breast feeding and not taking any bottles. I've donated what I can to a milk bank but I have a lot left that I can't as I was either definitely taking ibuprofen (post section) or potentially taking it - I know I took some for headaches and since I only remembered the rough date I ruled out a lot of days to meet the criteria for the milk bank. I'm now getting close to the 6 months mark for some of the expressed milk and it's not going to be used here.

I know there's ways I can donate to people directly but I'm but not sure if it's the right thing to do considering it has been deemed unsuitable for a milk bank. However, the milk bank criteria is much stricter then NICU, and all my milk meets the NICU requirements in terms of what medication I was on. I'm also a bit concerned about the vulnerability of the woman on the Facebook pages where you can donate directly, and whether I'm supporting a message that breast milk is superior to women that might be struggling. However, throwing out breast milk feels wrong!

Has anyone made the decision to donate through unofficial channels / used those channels?

Bump

I'd dump it. Imagine the baby got sick coincidentally at the same time as you had donated the milk?

I'd donate it with the disclaimer that you may have had some ibuprofen (I assuming within the acceptable amounts). Breastmilk is superior, it's a wonderful gesture.

Argh, two competing views which have the opinions I'm bouncing between! If I did donate I would be very clear about the medication.

Dump it.

Keep it and use it in milk baths

There is nothing wrong with throwing out breast milk. I don't mean to be crass, but it's not liquid gold. It's fluid that came from your body that you don't need and potentially has medication in it which isn't ideal for a baby to ingest.

Milk banks have said they don't want to accept - presumably because it's potentially not the best thing to give to a newborn.

There's no way I'd take it for my newborn under those circumstances (sorry).

But some vulnerable parents who like you say, have this message that breast milk is best at all costs, might.

Just dump it.

Perfect

Thanks all - particularly @PennineWay. I've been surrounded by the importance of breast milk for 3 months in NICU and lots of mother's struggling to express when I had an oversupply, so definitely needed a perspective shift. I've donated what I can through official channels so I've done what I can!

🙄

Your concern is totally valid and for clarity see the Breastfeeding Network's drugs fact sheet on painkillers. Their drugs in breastmilk service is the UK's leading resource for information on breastmilk and is listed as a resource by the NHS here.

The fact sheet states:

"Products containing ibuprofen are also safe for a breastfeeding mother to take."

The reason milk banks have such strict regulations on medications is that they provide the milk to premature and sick babies. The UK Association for Milk Banking (UKAMB) states:

"Babies who will receive donor breastmilk are normally very premature and may well be poorly, so it is essential that the milk is as pure as it can be and free of any drug which may impact on the baby receiving it. The babies are also very vulnerable because their livers and kidneys, which have to deal with any drug to which they are exposed, are still very immature and not fully functioning. All babies born at term are more susceptible to drugs in the first 6 weeks of their life, a period in which we are careful about what drugs we use. Premature babies are vulnerable for much longer. It is also important that they don’t receive anything which may interact with medicines which they may be given directly."

For most babies (including your own who you fed), your breastmilk whilst taking ibuprofen is safe and hugely beneficial. It is of course your decision but the information above hopefully helps to show that you would still be doing a good thing by putting your breastmilk to good use. Parents can make an informed decision with the information you provide. There really is no need to save this milk for milk baths only. As you said you would have happily fed it to your baby if he took a bottle and another parent would undoubtedly be equally happy to feed it to their baby.

In terms of your concerns about the vulnerability of women you would be donating to and promoting a message that breastmilk is superior to formula, I get what you're saying but I don't believe this is the case at all. All mothers and families should be free to chose how best to feed their babies and too often breastfeeding people are not given the support they need to achieve their breastfeeding goals. This can often mean stopping breastfeeding before they are ready and with this can bring a whole host of emotions which can affect their mental health. If a mother or parent choses for their baby to receive breastmilk but is for whatever reason not able to produce sufficient amounts to meet their baby's need, it is surely a wonderful thing for another mother to help them to feed their baby in a way they chose.

Formula is obviously a totally fine decision to make. Personally both of my children received formula at times. But it is equally fine for a parent to chose donated breastmilk. I don't think we need a moral argument on formula vs breastmilk - it can be so reductive. Parents need to support each other and everyone should be given the help they need to feed their baby in the way they chose and to meet their feeding goals, whatever they are.

You're doing a really great thing by donating.

In my experience, milk banks have plenty. I got a “no thanks” from three milk banks because they were at full capacity.
you won’t be risking any preemie’s chances of getting human milk by dumping it.
I know it feels hard to dump it. I kept one sachet in the freezer just because I like having it there. Dumped the rest, or mixed it with toddler porridge.

I wouldn’t donate directly on FB.
i recently donated some infertility meds on FB, I didn’t ask to see the woman’s prescription, just trusting she had the same condition as me. Then she told me on handover that she had only been trying four months and just thought it would help. I was too embarrassed to grab it back. Wish I had though.
obviously this doesn’t match the same
issues as breastmilk, but personally I won’t be using FB for anything to do with healthcare again.

Use some in your baby's food (porridge, scrambled egg, etc) before it expires and then just get rid of it - it's served its purpose!

Do a Marie Kondo - thank it for being there for you and then get rid of it without guilt.

I'd donate it.
And i'd gladly accept the donation too if I needed it at this point.
Don't dump it, it is liquid gold and its really kind of you to even think about donating.

My two cents are that I think I'd be open to accepting breast milk from a friend or a friend of a friend I trusted but I don't think I would from a stranger.

If it's coming up to 6 months, I'm assuming your baby is over 6 months. Use it in cooking for them. Porridge, other cereals, mix with mashed veg, eggs, anything that you might usually add milk to.

He'll be weaned at 6 months corrected, so 9 months chronologically, otherwise I agree that this would be the obvious solution!

Thanks for everyone's input.