How do I stop breastfeeding?

[maxbear]

Ds is 11 months and I am now feeling that it is a good time to stop. Two main reasons, I am going back to work in a month and will not get home until he is in bed, the main reason though is that it has got really uncomfortable recently, it feels as though he is sucking through his teeth. I think it must be me as I tried a pump today which felt the same.
Anyway I dropped most of his daytime feeds in early January with no problems at all. He even started to sleep all night. So for a month have been doing first thing and before bed. I dropped the first thing one yesterday and it seemed fine until this morning when he would not take his cup of milk and cried for over an hour from 5am onwards. Anyway I fed him before bed as usual and he had a good long feed, my plan is to wait a week or so until the engorgement has settled down and then to drop the last feed. It suddenly occurred to me that he is never going to be happy to go to sleep without milk and I'm sure that he will probably refuse a cup at that time and I can just see him waking and crying on and off all night.
The other thing is that last time when I gave up feeding dd (at six months) I was engorged for two weeks which was horrid. I am not looking forward to it at all, but I suppose I just have to and bear it.

My DS is also 11m and I've slowly reduced the feeds, so that he was down to only 1 at night...until last week again when he got ill and now is boobie monster again, but that's another story!

What I found was my boobs adjusted as DS was just taking less at each feed. I know the aim is to get them off the bottle at 1 onto a cup, but I've been told that most babies need the comfort from sucking from their bedtime feed, so could you offer a bottle at bedtime as a transition, or is your DS one of those babies who has refused a bottle? appreciate some BF babies will never take a btl in which case that won't help you.

If he will take a btl, one thing you can do is reduce the BF by a minute every few days, and top up with a bottle, just adjusting down to the next minute when your boobs are comfortable with this.

I do think you're more likely to get engorged when LO is 6mo, but less likely at 12mo as your body has become more used to adjusting, so hopefully you shouldn't find it as bad as last time. I find now that Ds can hardly take anything one day, then 4 feeds anight the next and there's no difference in my boobs the next day. (How i don't miss those bra pads and leaky boobs ).

HTH, but it's taken me so long to type this, an expert has prob beaten me to it with much more succinct advise!

I'm trying to stop too at the moment- I've cut down to a small feed every other day (DS is ten months) and I'm still getting engorged- I even leaked at work today (hadn't fed him yesterday)! It's like my boobs just don't want to stop...

Has he got a cold or anything at the moment as that could be putting him off the cup and making him want the comfort of the breast

maxbear could not not cut out the night feed but carry on with the morning feed? SOunds like he missed his morning feed today.

It might be easier to carry on with one feed a day as its a great way to connect/cuddle first thing and also it helps protect against all the lurgies at nursery etc and might well makes it easier for you (less need to take time off when he is ill etc etc).

Or could you express and give him EBM in a bottla last thing at night? Thast might well settle him more easily than formula/cows milk in a cup.

Some interesting info here
www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/ebf-benefits.html

Thanks everyone, reading the link just made me want to continue, but it hurts now and has done for a week or so. Don't want to change now that I have stopped the morning feed as would feel as though I was confusing him, but I will probably keep feeding him in the evening for a while, maybe until I am at work. He might take a cup better from his Daddy if he knows I'm not there.
This morning after he had cried on and off for about 50 mins refusing milk I took him downstairs and gave him breakfast with which he happily took milk Then promptly went back to bed for over an hour. Alright for some!!

Max, I had some nipple pain about the same time with DD2 and it was because my latch had got very lazy. This happens when, say, your LO wishes to bfeed stood on the bed with their bum in the air.

Anyway I made an effort with my latch for a week and all was well again. Still bfing morning and bedtime at 23 months but can go away for the weekend with no leaks etc. so it's great. Your boobs get more adaptable as time goes by I think.

HTH

Nope not a latch thing as it looks pretty much how it always has, although the other day when he was lying on his back clapping and kicking his legs in the air it was particularly uncomfy!!

How about starting expressing too so your DH can give him a cup of ebm at bedtime when you do go back to work? Would that help?

Thanks for the advice laundrylover (good name) although I thought at first that the latch was not the problem I have tried feeding him sitting up the past few evenings and it has been much more comfy.
Thanks also panacotta, he does take ebm much better than formula or cows milk, but I find it quite difficult to express now that I don't get very full, might give it a try though. Now that I have got down to one feed a day I feel that I don't want to give that one up!
On the positive side, he slept until 6.30 this morning so I just got him up and dressed and took him straight down for breakfast.

Glad things are looking better Max, it was exactly the same with my latch but it did help and now we are back to bizarre feeding positions.

FWIW I still really enjoy my morning and bedtime feeds so hope you can continue to enjoy your one a day.

BTW do you warm up the cow's milk as mine only take it warm, I would also drop the formula and keep on with cow's at 11 months.

Maxbear - sounds like the one feed a day is really working out for you. Really glad to hear it.

I've recently finished BF my 15 month old - I just stopped from two feeds a day (they were both very short) and haven't had any problems.

Just thought I'd add my penny's worth... I've just stopped feeding my 11 mth old. Well actually he decided he didn't want his one evening feed a day back on thursday evening. Been really struggling since then as quite badly engorged. Been trying to keep it comfortable and just getting through it. Assume that it won't be too bad for much longer (I hope not 2 weeks!)
I know it's the best way to do it- him choosing when to stop rather than it being forced on him but quite sad anyway! Am also back to work in a month.
Good luck with it MaxBear!