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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Help - advise needed please loosing the plot

5 replies

H44123 · 10/03/2023 10:36

Hi all

Hopefully you can help… I am at my wits end!

baby is 4 weeks old. Last Friday he screamed non stop which we thought was due to constipation, he hadn’t been for 3 days. We went to a&e and doctor said colic and have some liquid paracetamol.

The next day he pooed a really solid clay type poo, then an hour later a more normal poo. Over the weekend he continued crying and fussing and just generally not being a happy baby at all. When I say cry… he screams.

I suspected silent reflux. I saw the HV on the Monday who said she thinks possible silent reflux. He has been on cow and gate first milk when he was born and now for 2 weeks on comfort milk which is suppose to help colic and constipation. So I went to the GP Tuesday and broke down. She said looked at the picture of his poo and felt his belly and said constipated so gave lactulose. Also have gaviscon for the possible reflux but I asked for something else as I know it causes constipation but she said start this first. So I have 2 doses of the lactulose and he pooed. The evening he got fussy again but I think just normal colic/over tired. The following day screamed so as per GP tried gaviscon and only used in 2 feeds but I knew he was blocked again. By now he hasn’t pooed since weds. Last night, he screamed all night. I know he is overtired now but it started with him squirming in his sleep and fidgeting and waking up. You can see him trying to push. I spent hours last night massaging/bicycles legs etc but nothing so reluctantly gave him lactulose this morning but nothing as yet.

My questions are:

  • could there be something else causing his bad guts/digestion/constipation? Such as an allergy? He has no other symptoms
  • is it normal for a 4 week old to scream from trying to poo? Or is he screaming to that level for that long for something else?
  • I am pretty sure he is trying to poo, straining, scrunching up and pushing. I know babies are limited in what they can do so if it’s the reflux would he act like this?

sorry for the long message. I am reluctant to change his milk to prevent causing further issues. I also have private medical care with work so debating pushing to be seen through that but would need a referral from GP.

I am exhausted and also heartbroken. My baby is never happy, always crying even during the day. Doesn’t nap during the day, sleeps bad at night and screams murder. I don’t know how much more I can cope. Everyone I know has had normal happy babies and I never expected any of this

OP posts:
DoulaBriaAI · 10/03/2023 10:38

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

abbs1 · 10/03/2023 10:50

This sounds exactly like what my baby boy did. Offered gaviscon, lactulose etc but only masked the issue. Found he had cows milk protein allergy CMPA and was put on prescription milk. Took a few to find one that he completely settled on but he was fine then. All symptoms your describing gone.
I would go back to the GP and question cmpa and ask for a prescription milk to try. You know your bubba better than they do and just giving medication instead of dealing with the route issue isn't a long term solution.

Original poster
H44123 · 10/03/2023 11:04

@abbs1 can I ask what symptoms your boy had? My baby isn’t sicky, occasionally a bit after feeding but just more dribbles. From what I have read, babies with CMPA or an allergy tend to have diarrhoea?

I totally agree with you in that it is just making the issue. But as a FTM I don’t know what is considered normal crying or newborn behaviour.

If the lactulose kicks in and he is better this afternoon it might be that it was due to constipation again? If not then god knows what else. He is just never settled or comfortable. We have tried colief, Infacol gripe water etc.

It makes me want to cry from frustration. Because all of it takes approx 2 weeks to trial which means I can’t see no end in sight. We don’t leave the house, he doesn’t nap during the day so I never have 5 minutes to get changed, also terrified he will start screaming when out. I weigh less now than I did pre pregnancy from the stress and upset I’m not eatting. I can about deal with being tired but the relentless screaming and not being able to fix it is getting me down. I know it’s not his fault, but I feel robbed of this newborn experience. No one I know had dealt with this. I imagined going on walks, going to classes etc but I don’t see how that is possible

OP posts:
Namechange285 · 10/03/2023 11:37

Hi OP, couldn't read and not reply to this. I have been where you are and it is utterly miserable. Completely get what you're saying about feeling robbed of the experience. My little girl was the same. She just screamed constantly, wouldn't settle, wouldn't nap. I was breastfeeding so didn't try different formulas etc, but did try cutting things out of my diet, gaviscon, omeprazole but nothing made much difference. However, she DID grow out of it and now she is a lovely, lively toddler. Keep trying the different methods and see if anything helps, but if it doesn't just know that it's nothing you are doing wrong. A couple of things that helped me were: going for a drive or walk with the pram (as at least she'd settle and I could get some headspace), going to classes after a drive so I'd at least have 30 mins after she'd slept where she was a bit more settled. Also, think about seeking support from other services - there may be an infant feeding team at the hospital who can help you, and if things get too much MIND offer some great services to support Mums. I really hope things improve soon and you sound like you're doing an amazing job

abbs1 · 17/03/2023 20:03

H44123 · 10/03/2023 11:04

@abbs1 can I ask what symptoms your boy had? My baby isn’t sicky, occasionally a bit after feeding but just more dribbles. From what I have read, babies with CMPA or an allergy tend to have diarrhoea?

I totally agree with you in that it is just making the issue. But as a FTM I don’t know what is considered normal crying or newborn behaviour.

If the lactulose kicks in and he is better this afternoon it might be that it was due to constipation again? If not then god knows what else. He is just never settled or comfortable. We have tried colief, Infacol gripe water etc.

It makes me want to cry from frustration. Because all of it takes approx 2 weeks to trial which means I can’t see no end in sight. We don’t leave the house, he doesn’t nap during the day so I never have 5 minutes to get changed, also terrified he will start screaming when out. I weigh less now than I did pre pregnancy from the stress and upset I’m not eatting. I can about deal with being tired but the relentless screaming and not being able to fix it is getting me down. I know it’s not his fault, but I feel robbed of this newborn experience. No one I know had dealt with this. I imagined going on walks, going to classes etc but I don’t see how that is possible

Hi OP,
So sorry I didn't reply. So my little boy would grunt and cry for hours literally from like 4-7am as he just couldn't poo. He had so much wind and then would do a huge blow out nappy everywhere. I can't remember how many outfits had to be thrown away. We could never lay him down as he would scream from the reflux pain. We tried infacol, the gp tried gaviscon etc but it didn't work. It was only when he failed to thrive they did something but we were in the height of the first big lockdown so no one would see him.
Have you managed to take him to the gp or ask the hv about trying some prescription milk? It's not fair for him or you to suffer like this.
Has he got mucus in his poos at all? If he's dribbling a lot it could also be from reflux as he doesn't want to swallow as it hurts too much.

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