can i go coldturkey on one year olds nightfeeding?

[maltatheterrible]

DDs sleep has always been pretty rubbish, i have tried going to her, soothing, feeding, ignoring and letting her scream (i know it will awful i will NEVER do it again) and like loads of mums i am sooo sick of having no sleep

she is only waking for a quick feed i.e less than 5 minutes, but she stays latched on with her eyes open for up to 2 hours and if i try to put her down she screams

could i just pick up, cuddle, reassure until she goes back to sleep but offer no milk? she will go ballistic, she won't take a bottle so i can't water down, i just don't know what to do

is it cruel to not feed her at night if that is what she wants?

Have you thought about co-sleeping? She can latch on and you can go back to sleep - I did it with DS and it was a godsend.

oh god poor you. I am in a sort-of-similar but not quite so extreme version, in that DS is nearly 2 and still waking once or twice for a 5 minute feed. Luckily he goes down straight after (normally).

It sounds like if she's having a 5 minute suck she's not hungry, the main thing she wants is to keep you next to her!

Can you try a quick feed, then back in cot and you rub her back for a bit? I think sometimes the problem is they learn that when they let go of the boob, it's straight back in teh cot, so their solution is not to let go.

I'd try 5 minute breast, then cuddle, then 5 minutes breast, then back in cot and back rub for 5 minutes and then if she's still screaming 5 minutes more breast etc. Just try to make her see that it's not the end of the world if she unlatches, you are still there.

At the end of the day though, if I had the answers then DS woudl be sleeping through!

yes, she just pats/thumps me all night and neither of us get any sleep! but thankyou for the response, i might havwe to try it again and just inch away from her until i'm out of thumping distance!

You can do it but it would be hard on both of you for at least a couple of nights. When you say 1 year old do you mean 12m or nearer 18+? If she's a bit older and you don't want to co-sleep then I would say go for it but if she's nearer 12m I wouldn't be surprised if she did need the milk. My DS did. But you could still try and deal with the refusal to be put down - have you tried NCSS?

the proboem is she just hollers the second i unlatch her, she slept from 7pm til 10 last night, then just as i got into bed she woke up and spent 2 hours either latched on or "chatting" and pointing things out to me around her bedroom, i could have cheerfully murdered her

i think she may just be one of thosae babies who doesn't need any sleep, i will also TRY the back rubbing though, i am trying not to get into the "nnothing works" ment6ality but its hard

Nineunlikelytales, I bought NCSS and i think its great but only if you're a SAHM as she explained that it is crucial to sort out daytime sleeping and the nighttime will follow

i am cleaning and taking DD with me, she has never been a regular napper and our schedule does make it hard to instigate a routine, unfortuantely i can't afford to not work

today it really does feel like every thing i'm doing has a big cross next to it in the parenting manual of life

dd is one year on the 14th, so your DS really needed a feed at this age? hmm, i really don't want to deprive her so i guess its carry on for a bit then

Well I was totally convinced taht nothing would get DS off to sleep except a feed - and then I went back to work at 14 months and the nursery trained him to go down with someone rubbing his back.

Now, if he sees me he still has to have a feed but the back rubbing is a godsend.

One thing that helps with DS is to keep the room completely dark - no lights, no hall light, nothing. It helps with the desire to wake up and chat! it's also unfortunately incredibly boring for me, but it means I get slightly more sleep so i don't care.

Oh I didn't read that bit! I never followed any of the suggestions during the day as DS went to sleep so easily in the sling But I don't see why you shouldn't follow the ideas at night. It's only about trying to let your DD tralise that she can fall asleep without you being there.

Mind you, whether you would want to take sleep advice from me is a different matter. I think my DS was reading the No Sleep Cry Solution until recently

We did go cold turkey 2 weeks ago as he was having a lot of bottled water in the night and he was distressed when he couldn't have it, but he was in my or DH arms the whole time and since then he has slept a lot better thank God.

Good luck

youngvisiter - i am looking to go back to work soon, maybe i will have similar good fortune with the sleep problem

nineunlikelytales - ok will try total darkness tonight, probably cue me walking into the cot as i try to put her back down, swearing and waking her back up!