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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

Breastfeeding to sleep, do I stop this???

19 replies

kd1992 · 14/01/2023 22:29

Currently breastfeeding my 3.5 month DD to sleep at night. Sleeping through to 3/4am, waking for one feed then back to sleep (can take a while to settle off at this time)
But in the day we have started to establish a pretty good nap time routine, rocking to sleep. Then feeding after the nap. This has been going pretty well.
Unsure how to start to transition not feeding to sleep before bed? As DD falls asleep while feeding, kind of impossible to put her down semi awake as she's just so sleepy. Do I need to worry? Will this be something that will naturally stop?
Does anyway else have experience of stopping nursing to sleep at night?
Also will this make her falling to sleep more difficult once nursing stops.
Thanks

OP posts:

CampervanKween · 14/01/2023 22:34

I did this with my eldest. Do what works for you as long as you are happy with it. Eldest is now 21 and sleeps like a log. He's actually the best sleeper in the family.

Middle one would have a feed then I'd put him in his bag with his Teddy and he'd go off on his own. Slept through from 8 weeks. He's 17 now and has problems getting off to sleep 💤

Rufffles · 14/01/2023 22:35

There are no right or wrong answers to this. I was in your situation when my little boy was tiny. I'd found this magical way of getting him to sleep, but was scared of 'making a rod for my own back'. It turned out that feeding him to sleep suited everyone in the household, really well, right up until he was 3.5 (!!!!). I'd been wondering all along whether he'd just 'grow out of it'. Some do, some don't. When he got to that age I'd had enough, and stopping turned out to be much easier than I'd expected.

Go with the flow. If this current method suits you, stick with it until it doesn't.

SugarNspices · 14/01/2023 22:37

Whatever works for you. I always fed my baby and then they fell asleep.

Original poster

kd1992 · 14/01/2023 22:39

Thank you

I feel abit lost as there's so much out there telling you 'nursing to sleep is bad'.

But DD is so settled and remains asleep until 3/4am. Although after that feed can take a while to settle back down.

Wondered if to try and settle back to sleep without a feed in the early hours

OP posts:

SassyPants87 · 14/01/2023 23:31

I fed my DD to sleep, just worked out better and she slept well so didn’t want to rock the boat!

SassyPants87 · 14/01/2023 23:32

Oh and she’s 2 now and goes to sleep all by herself in her bed now. I miss the days when I would nurse her to sleep!

Calphurnia88 · 15/01/2023 08:02

Of course sleep consultants will tell you feeding to sleep is bad... Otherwise they wouldn't make nearly as much money 🙃

Honestly, do what's right for you. I wasted a lot of precious time during my baby's early weeks and months worrying about creating 'bad habits' when it came to his sleep. But the more I tried to fight what felt very natural for me and my baby, the more stressed I became. I've since learnt that feeding to sleep is very normal, and realistically, it's a lot easier than having to rock an ever-growing child (been there, done that).

I'm almost 10 months in and 'still' feeding to sleep for bedtime and through the night, although his wakes have reduced a lot recently, and he will now cuddle back to sleep for some of his wakes. This has happened without me changing anything!

Calphurnia88 · 15/01/2023 08:11

kd1992 · 14/01/2023 22:39

Thank you

I feel abit lost as there's so much out there telling you 'nursing to sleep is bad'.

But DD is so settled and remains asleep until 3/4am. Although after that feed can take a while to settle back down.

Wondered if to try and settle back to sleep without a feed in the early hours

In response to this - if DD is only waking once in the night at 3/4am, I would assume she's gone several hours without a feed and you should feed her.

3.5mo is far too early for night weaning, which is what you would be doing if you actively tried to stop feeding her overnight.

I don't mean this to sound patronising, but it be might be worth you having a chat with someone from La Leche League for some general advice on breastfeeding. I did when I had concerns around sleep and feeding (I actually posted on here!) and found a chat with LLL really reassuring. They usually have local reps you can find online and speak to for free.

SalviaOfficinalis · 15/01/2023 08:15

At this age it’s fine. I found that as my DS got older he stopped just falling asleep when being fed.

Sleep habits become more important after 6 months so don’t worry for now.

BertieBotts · 15/01/2023 08:18

They definitely stop feeding to sleep

Don't worry. It's not a problem unless it becomes a problem for you. If it does become a problem, you can change things then. Don't spend your life stressing about things that don't matter just because you've read in a book about "drowsy but awake" or whatever is the current thing.

YukoandHiro · 15/01/2023 08:20

I still feed my 2y 3m old DD to sleep if I'm home for bedtime. She goes off fine for my DH if I'm not. Please don't worry about it - do what works and makes your life easier, not what the books say

Flittingaboutagain · 15/01/2023 08:20

I'm in a breastfeeding group with over 200 women and the feed before bed is usually the last one to go. Many mums are feeding toddlers to sleep. I feed my 18 month old on demand still, always feed to sleep and it causes no issues. She no longer asks for milk if she wakes in the night ie she can go back to sleep without it. I've done no sleep training at all.

BendingSpoons · 15/01/2023 08:27

Breastfeeding to sleep is normal at this age. I don't think there is any point swapping it for rocking in the night, unless you want your partner to be able to do some nights. Rocking will still require you, and will be more effort than feeding.

QuiltedHippo · 15/01/2023 08:31

Your milk is designed to put your baby to sleep! So much easier than trying to force something else when they're still tiny. I did it until 18 months then stopped with no problems, if you're having sucess with rocking for naps then you'll probably find it even easier or doable earlier. I look back and wonder why I worried about this sort of thing enjoy your little one

HousePlantNeglect · 15/01/2023 13:07

Tbh you have to get them to sleep somehow! None of mine miraculously fell asleep on their own (I never had one of these mythical ‘put them down drowsy but awake’ babies). So either you pat, rock, bounce, or feed them to sleep. Feeding tends to be the easiest if it works the only downside being it’s you that has to do it. If it’s working now I wouldn’t fret about it.

Calphurnia88 · 15/01/2023 13:12

SalviaOfficinalis · 15/01/2023 08:15

At this age it’s fine. I found that as my DS got older he stopped just falling asleep when being fed.

Sleep habits become more important after 6 months so don’t worry for now.

Not asking to be goady, but can you explain what exactly happens to every baby at 6 months to mean that you should stop feeding to sleep?

I remember seeing this online but it never being explained. And then my baby turned 6 months... And nothing magical happened. I've figured since then that it's just been made up to help sleep consultants sell their services to tired mums.

Twizbe · 15/01/2023 13:22

Feed to sleep if it works. No point making life hard for yourself.

I fed to sleep until it stopped working which was around 9 months for both.

SalviaOfficinalis · 15/01/2023 14:08

Calphurnia88 · 15/01/2023 13:12

Not asking to be goady, but can you explain what exactly happens to every baby at 6 months to mean that you should stop feeding to sleep?

Show quote history

I didn’t say to stop feeding to sleep at 6 months though… I said sleep habits become more important.

If feeding to sleep is still working for the OP after 6 months then that’s great.

I personally found that my DS could only stay asleep for longer than one sleep cycle if he went to sleep independently. And he wasn’t able to do that before about 6 months.

Calphurnia88 · 15/01/2023 15:31