Does breastfeeding ever just get easier?

[Fortuny]

DS is 9 weeks, we've struggled with feeding and he was initially slow to gain weight so we temporarily supplemented formula. DS has minor posterior tongue tie and it looks like a bit of a lip tie. We were referred to the NHS specialist and they've said he's passed all the TT tests and confirmed tie isn't impacting him.

However it's still incredibly painful for me. I've had blanching, broken skin, milk blebs and engorgement. DS can open wide but doesn't seem to want to, and he pulls back on the nipple when he does achieve a deep latch. The worst bit is that he still has prominent upper and lower lip blisters, which makes me feel awful.

I regularly go to our local BFing help group which has improved things but it's still a struggle for both of us. I don't know what else to do.

Go private and get the tongue tie sorted as soon as possible so your baby can learn how to feed properly once it’s gone. My baby had her tongue tie sorted when she was 1 day old.

My baby had upper lip tie so breast feeding was a nightmare. I persevered for 3 months. It was very painful because my baby could not flange his lips properly so my nipple couldn't get far enough into his mouth.

It shouldn't still be painful at 9 weeks. If the NHS won't clip it, then you should find a private practitioner. Nipple pain for this long is a reason alone to get it released! Just be aware that most babies have a "lip tie" (ie a normal frenulum) and it isn't actually a problem or cause for the pain in most cases).

I have breast fed six babies (one set of twins) it has always been a bit tricky in the beginning (funny enough, different issues each time). Baby #4 had to be fed, standing up, bouncing her on the back of the sofa!
The babies lip blisters can happen anyway but you being sore is not okay!
Let you nipples have a good air after each feed, if you can and a product called Lansinoh www.chemistwarehouse.com.au/buy/76510/lansinoh-hpa-lanolin-15g was life changing for me.
Is your baby high enough? Try feeding on a pillow to avoid drag. You are doing such a great job!
However, you don't have to persevere if you don't want. Nine weeks is awesome.

I had this on the NHS, they said it wasn't bad enough to warrant them snipping it which was entirely untrue. Its not just the baby this impacts its you. If you get mastitis you can get very sick, so rather than rely on the wholly useless NHS to screw you over, go private and sort the tongue tie.

Do you want to keep breastfeeding? If so get it sorted. Also even if they are feeding well it's bloody full on at 9 weeks, with both my babies I felt it didn't get easier until 5-6 months. So you aren't far off.

Yes, it does get easier. But it sucks. (No pun intended).

my first baby had, I suspect, undiagnosed tongue tie. By about three months it was much easier though I did still get occasional nipple bleeding up to six months.it’s when I first found mumsnet, writing posts very similar to yours. My subsequent babies had tongue tie cut on day 2/3 by trained midwives, mostly because I was very pushy following experience with DC1.

you don’t have to breast feed. Formula is a perfectly valid option. Or, 9 weeks in, you don’t have to breast feed for every feed.

I truly hope it gets better for you.

It does get easier, having said that, your experience doesn't sound right for 9 weeks. You shouldn't be in pain. I would definitely look for private help if that's a possibility for you. To heal broken / sore nipples I really recommend the purple lanolin nipple cream and then jelonet. I used a patch on each nipple at night for a while and it definitely helped.

Try to get baby formula that contains no fluoride, as in some parts of the UK the tap water is artificially fluoridated, plus the fluoride added to baby formula this may cause gut microbiome trouble.
We used goat milk as a supplement or Holle baby formula which didn't cause too much burping.
Also stay away from anything with artificial sweeteners in as new research published in the New York post shows they can actually cause diabetes and adversely affect the gut microbiome too.

www.holle.ch/en/produkt/organic-infant-goat-milk-formula-1/

Have you tried a breast pump, pump the milk and store it in a fridge then slightly warm it to body tempreture before giving it to your baby in a bottle or pump and feed straight away. Just till your nipples have time to heal but still producing breast milk, which is best for baby.

Thanks all. I'm not sure about the TT, I was referred to the local hospital not just the midwife and he does have a strong suck. IMO the pulling back off the nipple is the issue now. But I'll have a look into any local practices.

Its mainly my left breast with the issues, and is my high producer. I also have mummy thumb in the corresponding hand, so there's definitely an element of poor form.

Initially I thought it was my supply but I'm able to pump 4-5 ounces regularly and although I don't really leak if I hand express there seems to be plenty there and it often spurts.

Honestly (TMI) but I do wonder if my nipples are just to large for DS. I've been measuring for my pump and they're at least 24 each.

I'm using lanolin, I try to express daily as we have to supplement DS to give him gaviscon for his reflux. We have given formula, def not against doing so but selfishly I do hate it and all the cleaning faff. Also despite the pain I love BFing which is why I'm hoping it'll get easier.

Well, if you love it, stick to it!
It definitely got easier for me. You really need to get a good mouthful of boob in. Even if you boobs are sore, they should settle if baby is on well. Have you tried the Lansinoh, in the purple tube. I used to keep the tiny tube in my bra so it was always soft and easier to use. My nipples got larger with each baby and even my last (who was a tiny 5lb) could attach with a bit of oomph.
I am not aware of 'mummy thumb', I used to get a 'feeders neck' from gazing at my babies 😉

Yes it goes easier for me. Best thing I could of ever done. I love it 🥰

Hmm your update suggests that it might not be the tongue tie. Small baby and large nipples can cause a "fit" issue that just resolves with time as the baby grows. Could also be a forceful letdown causing baby to pull back to a shallow latch. Are you sure you're using optimal positioning and attachment to bring baby deeply and asymmetrically onto the breast? And feeding in a laidback position? Tbh I'd still recommend a home visit by someone with good BF training to review all the issues.

If he closes his mouth once he's latched on, get him on and then try pulling his chin down with your thumb to open his mouth wider again. I did that frequently with both of my babies who used to do something similar.

I dont think its great form, no. Especially with my wrist pain.

I'll try this, thanks

Rather than getting seen privately for TT I would try and pay to see a IBCLC. You can usually do this in person or on zoom. Not saying your local bf support group isn’t good enough, just maybe some specialist support would help? They would also be able to tell you whether it would be worth your money to get a private TT assessment.

So sorry to hear about your pain and discomfort with breastfeeding. I agree with others that it’s worth re-visiting his tongue tie/latch. It sounds like you’re doing everything right.

In the meantime, have you considered trying silver nipple shields to give your poor nipples some TLC while you get used to feeding? Sounds like a gimmick but they have honestly worked miracles for me. I was suffering with one incredibly sore and raw-feeling nipple while breastfeeding that was so painful I’d cry in agony when my baby fed. No amount of Lansinoh balm helped, and having a break and expressing from that one breast was getting tiring and also still painful. Decided to try silver nipple shields as the midwife in my ante natal class raved about them, and 3-4 days into wearing them my nipple was completely pain free when feeding. It was amazing. The silver shields feel so much more soothing and comfortable than using balm and it also means your nipples aren’t squashed under breast pads and keep their shape in your bra. I feel like they’ve helped my nipples build up a resistance to feeding whilst also giving them a break in between feeds. The antibacterial and anti fungal properties of the silver genuinely have worked wonders. Paying £25 for them felt like a gamble at the time, but it was totally worth it. Might be worth a try if you feel like you’ve exhausted other options.

Really hope things get better for you. Pain from BFing really drags you down.