Breastfeeding hurting badly

[dreamerkr]

Hey guys, I had my first DC a week ago today and breastfeeding has been difficult to say the least. First, my baby just wouldn’t latch on no matter what and he was always hungry and crying. Seeing him cry that much made me cry and I had to give him formula because I felt so bad for him. My milk came in on day 4 or 5 and I started to breastfeed him too, now I’m trying to breastfeed most of the time and give him 1 or 2 bottles of formula until I get the hang of it. My nipples are so sore though that it’s so painful. It hurts so bad that I’m literally almost in tears when I’m breastfeeding. I’ve been using lansinoh but it doesn’t seem to be helping much. The pain is that bad that I’ve felt like giving up with breastfeeding even though I badly want to continue. It makes me so upset thinking of giving up with it but I don’t know what to do. It’s so painful that I’m almost crying especially when he’s feeding from the left side. Help?

I went through this. It does get better though. As you carry on your nipples will get used to it. Keep using your nipple cream and feeding/pumping regular so you don't become engorged. Breastfeeding is so hard. Don't feel defeated if you want to stop,a fed baby is a happy baby. You have my sympathies OP

There's 2 (quite) easy to fix things that could be making it painful

• latch not deep enough; YouTube vide for "flipple technique" should help
• poor baby positioning; again YouTube videos can help, baby should be level (side to side) and have their bum tucked in to your chest (not hanging away from your body)

You should feel a difference after a few feeds Don't be afraid to detach them mid feed and correct position/latch - they need to learn to do it right too! To detach them without pain try removing your nipple from underneath.

Oh bless you. Something isn't right and you need the help of a professional breastfeeding expert. You can call the NCT breastfeeding helpline or find a lactation consultant lcgb.org/find-an-ibclc/

In the meantime, until you can get professional help, google biological nurturing or laid-back breastfeeding and give it a go to see if it helps.

Very simply it's a way of letting your baby's in built in feeding reflexes take charge. You need to lie back a bit (not flat, just reclined) on a sofa or prop yourself up in bed and place your baby (un-swaddled) on your bare chest close to a boob. You can place a light blanket over both of you for warmth. Your baby will probably bob their head about and 'bash' you with their arms to find a nipple. They can then latch themselves by lifting their head and plonking it right down on your nipple. They can get a good deep latch like this which should help your pain.

But please do seek professional help as well. ❤️

It could be worth getting him checked for tongue tie if the pain continues. With my baby I was in excruciating pain for first few weeks until it was discovered she had tongue tie. Once that had been dealt with the pain stopped within a couple of days.

vimeo.com/210224351

The voiceover is a bit (a lot) annoying but this is the general idea!

Hmm sorry not sure that link is working - trying again vimeo.com/210224351

Or see www.biologicalnurturing.com/video/bn3clip.html

dreamerkr I feel for you. Weirdly enough I was telling my DD1 today, now in her 20's(!) and studying pnd, that, when she was about a week old, I used to cry in anticipation of the pain when I picked her up to feed. I persevered and fed her (and her two younger siblings) for a year each.
I didn't have a wrong position, imagine constantly rubbing your lip for a week, it hurts! You are nearly past the worst if you carry on, but whatever you decide to do it is fine.
Congrats on your DS.

Ask for the infant feeding team to help, or find a private IBCLC if you can afford it.
They can check latch and positioning, tongue function. Could try nipple
shields in the mean time?

Agree with PP - tongue tie. I have a scar on my breast, 9 years later, as my breasts were shredded.

Ask your midwife to take a look when she comes round. Mine looked at my boobs, at DDs tongue and made a referral for me straight away.

Also, don't be so hard on yourself. Breastfeeding is constant and demanding, some grow to love it and some don't. Both are ok.

Thank you so much guys. I don’t want to give up at all with breastfeeding, I’ll definitely talk to the midwife tomorrow as she will come anyway to take out my stitches.

Bless you, I remember just what this was like, my son really struggled with latch when he was teeny too and the pain reduced me to tears multiple times a day.

I echo what others have said about seeing a lactation consultant; your health visitor should be able to put you in touch with your local infant feeding team but there can be a bit of a wait. If you can afford it I highly recommend finding a private lactation consultant (IBCLC), some will do a video consultation which can be cheaper than in person. I had an in person consultation and within 5 minutes and a slight tweak to my technique I was feeding him painlessly.

In the meantime, for dealing with the sore nipples, the best product I found was Multi Mam nipple compresses. You can get them in Boots. They have a cooling, soothing gel on them and they gave me instant relief. Keep on with the Lansinoh too as it will help stop them getting dry and cracked in the long run, but the compresses were much more helpful for the pain.

While I was waiting to see the lactation consultant I did find that pumping and giving him expressed milk was helpful to give my poor bleeding nipples a bit of a rest. It’s fine to give the odd bottle of formula too if you need a break but make sure you’re expressing if you do that to keep your supply up, if you want to EBF in the long run.

Also check out La Leche League, they have some great guides to positioning and latch.

Well done for persevering, I felt like giving up so many times that first week but last week we made it to 6 months exclusive breastfeeding. If you want to keep going I promise you can do it with the right support and it does get easier! Remember your baby is new at this too, you just need to figure out how to work together to find the right technique for you both. :)

Keep going, soon it won't hurt I promise and you'll feel so pleased you carried on x
It's so good for little one to get your breastmilk x

You've had some good advice and seeking an expert or local bf group will be really helpful. The early days can be painful. Your breasts are swollen with milk and getting used to the demand from your little one. I found the let down painful at first and understand how swollen and painful you feel. I bought some heat/cool gels made for breastfeeding that I used in the early weeks which helped ease the discomfort. Maybe you could try a warm hot water bottle or frozen peas wrapped in a flannel to get the same effect. I didn't wear a bra for weeks and instead used reusable breast pads to stop leaks coming through. I wore strappy vest tops which kept the pads in place. Some of my friends have found nipple shields useful so that might be worth a try too? You could also buy a Hakka pump to release the pressure in between feeds. I just suctioned it on and left it hanging on for a few minutes to collect some excess milk. Keep putting the lansinoh on regularly as that will be helping. I would also offer my dd a feed sometimes when I needed the relief in the hope she would be hungry rather than waiting for her to ask. I ended up bf for 23 months in the end and the pain soon went went after the first couple of weeks.

Very good advice given by many PP.

I second the cooling gel pads. Medela has them as well.

You will need a trained consultant. There are different gradations of tongue tie, the lip band can also be tied.

Oh gosh! I know this pain!! It felt like a thousand paper cuts on my nipples! Soooo painful! I wanted to give up so bad! It does get better. I'd say by week 2/3 it was much better. Both you and your baby are learning, like most new things, you need practice to get it 'right'. What helped me was, lots of nipple cream, spending time without a bra on (airing my nips!), watching YouTube videos of latching techniques and different feeding positions. It was my mum who encouraged me to push through the pain, she assured me it would get better and it did. I know it's hard in the moment imaging it will get better, but it really will!

You're doing amazing. It's normal to go through this tricky phase as you both get the hang of it and it's normal to feel like giving up! Even with my second baby, I went through it again and felt like giving up all over again, but I knew it would improve based off my experience with my first so it was a bit easier to push through. Best of luck!!

Oh I feel your pain! Definitely talk to your midwife and check out some YouTube videos re latching techniques. Olivia Lactation Consultant on instagram is v.good too. For what it’s worth I found it incredibly painful for the first few weeks and then it just sort of stopped hurting. We’re now 8 months in and no pain at all since those first few weeks. Good luck with it.

Thank you so much guys, I definitely won’t give up with it. However, even if I breastfeed for an hour baby seems hungry afterwards and needs a formula top up. Is this normal? Should I be giving him formula after feeding if he’s still hungry?

When do you feed for an hour? Because cluster feeding in the evenings is a thing...

For me, it was all about getting baby to open mouth right up before latching so the latch was really deep and didn't 'pinch'.

Don't be put off nipple shields if your nipple have cuts / too much pain. I have inverted nipples d was told that using them to help my DD latch would only work for a short time as shields reduce supply. This turned out to be rubbish & I fed her for 18 months using them. (Our only crisis being when we forgot to take one away with us for night feeds when she was over a year old - after that we kept a spare in the car at all times.)

I used these Medela ones - the size is related to your breast size, not the baby.
amzn.eu/d/adbODOl

I would also definitely look at tongue tie at I've lost count of the number of people who had a horrid start to breastfeeding because this basic issue wasn't checked immediately.

It may be that he’s feeding for so long because his latch isn’t great and so it’s taking him a long time to get enough milk. I had this with mine, he’d feed for 40 mins each side and still seem hungry sometimes.

Is he staying on continuously for that long or kind of coming on and off? He could be cluster feeding to increase your supply, which is normal, if a bit exhausting for you.

The issue with formula top ups is that they can decrease your supply, as your breasts will only produce what is taken out. So if you top up with formula, say 30ml, that’s 30ml your breasts “think” they don’t need to produce.

If you’re able to, try to just let him feed as long as he likes, and as long as he is gaining weight and doing enough wet and dirty nappies, I’d not worry about it! He will get more efficient at feeding as you go on, and your supply should increase to what he needs.