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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

MIX FEEDING, WANT TO BREASTFEED MORE BUT BABY NOT GAINING A LOT OF WEIGHT

94 replies

Dalrymps · 24/01/2008 17:24

the story so far...
I almost gave up bf cause it was painfull, I stopped for 5 days then realised it wasn't what I wanted so got in touch with a bf councillor and tried agian, since then I used an elecric pump to get my supply up and after a few weeks was getting 4 oz a day, I then began to try and bf him again just giving it a go once or twice a day. I am now at the stage where I am bf him three times a day with a formula top up after each bf (1-2oz) and he is getting 2 ff in between the bf's of 4-5oz, so 5 feeds a day, sleeps 8hrs through the night. Anyway, for the last 5 weeks his weight gain has slowed, used to be about 6-9oz a week, in the 3 weeks over xmas he gained 8oz, week after half an oz and last week 1 and a half oz. The people at the clinic said to try fitting in another feed but he refuses any more if I try yo give it him. I want to bf him mpre of the time but don't want to mess with his feding if he's not gaining enought weight? Just spoke to bf councillor and she said to bf him more, try to fit in 2 more feeds a day if poss and not to top his feeds up in the evening and to just keep bf him on demand in the evening... any advice? I'm a bit confused as to what to do, basically I want him to gain a good amount of weight and I want to BF him more!

OP posts:
Original poster
Dalrymps · 07/02/2008 14:22

yeah she's on her hols for 2 weeks. she keeps saying she'll call to see how his weigh in has gone but then she forgets, well, she called once but I missed the call and in her message she said she'd call back this mon but never did then i find out today she's spoken to the hv!

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2happy · 07/02/2008 14:33

Hi, carolyn is a lactation consultant - her background is midwifery but she is a fully trained and very experienced breastfeeding expert.

2happy · 07/02/2008 14:34

She trains others through sure start to be bf peer supporters (like me) but is far more trained than that herself.

2happy · 07/02/2008 14:39

And if you need any local peer support, BTW, I'm very nearby x

VictorianSqualor · 07/02/2008 14:45

I'd imagine that she is trying her best, and does know what she is talking about, but if she is having to support the Hv then it's going to be hard for her to discredit what the HV is saying, would you be able to see just her and not the HV?
I'd be surprised that if she is well trained and knows what she is talking about she would be reccommending adding an extra bottle when she would know that it would have an adverse affect rather than a positive one when you have been doing so well.
I'm also a bit reluctant to trust HV's advice wrt bfing as they are so often not trained in this at all, it is possible the HV could have suggested the extra bottle and passed it off as advice from the bf lady.

Original poster
Dalrymps · 07/02/2008 14:48

I thought she was fully trained! Just wish I could ask her why she's suggested more formula, I wish she'd have called me direct and discussed her reasons for the suggestion. Do you live in berwick 2happy?

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Original poster
Dalrymps · 07/02/2008 14:53

My dh said that, he's suspicious about it, I know they're all trying to help but I wish they'd just believe me when I say my baby is doing well, it's so frustrating, I will carry on feeding him as much as poss but i'm starting to think he's just got a fast metabolism or something?

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2happy · 07/02/2008 14:55

Near Cornhill. Go every week to Morrison's!! In fact was there this morning
Seriously, though, I completely rate Carolyn's expertise, but if she's on holiday I would be happy to offer my (less expert!) help, or there's a bfeeding support group in berwick, plus the drop in centres in Berwick and in Belford, and Dr Bromley at Well Close Square surgery is a peer supporter (trained by Carolyn!) if that's your GP surgery.

2happy · 07/02/2008 14:57

(oh, and would second the advice of stopping getting him weighed. I'm still paranoid about ds2's weight and it's my own stupid fault for getting him weighed in the first place. I wouldn't have a second's concern about him if I hadn't; and now I keep getting him weighed because I've made myself paranoid, but every time he's weighed it makes me more paranoid, even though his weight isn't that bad, he's just such a different build to ds1.... I reeeeeally need to stop getting him weighted!)

2happy · 07/02/2008 14:58

or weighed even

tiktok · 07/02/2008 15:12

Ah...Dalrymps, that's why she went through the HV, which is perfectly acceptable in her case, as she will act as a resource to HVs and midwives in your area.

It's not something a breastfeeding counsellor from one of the vol orgs would do, not because it's wrong in itself, but it would be wrong for us to do it as the mother's always the one we talk to.

Lactation consultants are indeed qualified to support breastfeeding.

I don't know why she suggested another bottle, and it's surprising but maybe she is not getting the full story from the HV....or the HV has misreported what she said. It's always difficult to be sure everyone has the full story including us here on the thread

I do think it would be worthwhile someone who's really knowledgable seeing you feed, and maybe the co-ordinator will see you as a priority when she returns?

Original poster
Dalrymps · 07/02/2008 15:15

yeah well any advice you can offer would be appreciated! dr bromley is my doc! Any idea why carolynn would have suggested more formula? last time I saw her she said to keep the ff the same and just bf as much as poss. I agree with you about getting him weighed, we think he's doing great but then we get him weighed and they all start interrogating us, and then we worry about it. I feel like now they're all watching me and discussing me behind my back when i'm doing nothing wrong, I kind of feel that if I refuse to get him weighed they'll think i'm neglecting ds

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Original poster
Dalrymps · 07/02/2008 15:18

tiktok - carolynn watched me herself a week and a half ago and said he was feeding great... I just don't understand it?

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tiktok · 07/02/2008 15:22

In that case, Dalrymps, you need to ask the HV why Carolynn suggested a bottle after she said you were doing great....you need to know why her advice has changed. It's not an unreasonable question to ask

2happy · 07/02/2008 15:29

Ok so he's latching well, peeing and pooing, and developing well. What's his weight like compared with, say, your family's build, or your other half's family's build. ds1 is built like dh (brick sh!thouse), and while I am always surprised at how much slighter ds2 is, half my family have struggled to make it to 5', so I shouldn't be surprised. ds2 didn't just have relatively slow weight gain, but at one point was actually losing weight. But maybe it's because he was really active. And he caught a few colds from ds1. There's lots of reasons why babies don't always follow the centiles, you have to look at the situation as a whole.

As to why Carolyn suggested an extra bottle, well I can only guess, but perhaps she was picking up on your anxieties. You're only worried because others have worried you - but perhaps she's hearing your worries about his weight and suggesting the ff as a way to help him put on weight to make you feel better - have I explained that all right?? Whereas, I think, what you need is someone to sit down, look at a feed, look at the child, listen to your worries, possibly give you a hug, and take you off to Spittal for a stroll along the prom and forget about getting him weighed for a bit.

I don't think the HVs should think any the worse of you for not getting him weighed, and if they have concerns they would phone you and chase you up. Do you need a buddy at the weigh ins? (if they happen to be on a thurs/fri - I work mon-weds)

Original poster
Dalrymps · 07/02/2008 15:30

Yeah well I said to the hv I couldn't understand why this had been suggested and she just said 'well thats carolynn's advice not mine' in a kind of pass the book sort of way, didn't tell me any more than that. I'm just starting to get really stressed out about it, I'm feeding him so much I hardly have time to do anything else and it doesn't seem to be making much difference, sometimes I feel like just putting him on formula again so I know how much he's having and they'll stop bothering me but I really want to bf him

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VictorianSqualor · 07/02/2008 15:38

Personally, what I would do (and please bear in mind I am not trained, nor have I ever been through this myself, but have dealt with many HCP's) is tell the HV you appreciate the advice but would prefer to give it a little longer before you introduce more formula as you feel he is thriving and want to discuss it properly with Carolynn before you make any adjustments.

Weigh baby once weekly at the same time etc until you get to see Carloynn and feed as much as possible, offering formula only after you have offered the breast.

When Carolynn gets back explain to her that yes, you've been fretting about his weight but you think that he seems well in himself and discuss it with her properly, ie how often he is being weighed, how you should supplement feeds and why she suggested the other bottle.

Original poster
Dalrymps · 07/02/2008 15:41

2happy- i have always been thin as are my brothers and my mum was even thinner than me, dh is not really thin but was extremely skinny as a child, thinner than ds is, I keep mentioning this to the hv but i get the impression they think this has nothing to do with it and that i'm just grasping at straws. most times dh comes with me to get him weighed so i'm ok there but it's stressing us both out.

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Original poster
Dalrymps · 07/02/2008 15:44

VS thats what I think i'll do, i've told hv i'm not giving more f for now...

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Bluebutterfly · 07/02/2008 15:44

I appreciate that my knowledge of these things is a few years out of date - because I was last bfing in 05 but in 07 the big news was that the Dept of Health was going to introduce new charts because the ones that they were using were from the 1970's and were based PREDOMINANTLY on bf babies.

Perhaps they have introduced the new charts already now, so I apologise if my information was a year out of date, but I do not think that it was merely a "popular misconception"

here andhere
and here

FioFio · 07/02/2008 15:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

2happy · 07/02/2008 16:02

I think the advice you're getting here is really sound. Don't feel pressured to introduce another bottle you're not happy to introduce - even if you wait the 2 weeks and talk to her, if you don't agree with carolynn's reasoning, it's your baby. He's not losing tonnes of weight and plummeting down the centiles... If you want to contact me, my email is becky at iain and beckys dot plus dot com - though no pressure!!
Also, what about talking to Susan Fairbairn - do you have her contact details?

Original poster
Dalrymps · 07/02/2008 16:09

thanks for the info, interesting reading, keep hearing different stories about the charts and wondered what the case was?

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2happy · 07/02/2008 16:11

The old charts were based on a mixture of bf and ff babies. I believe there are now 2 new charts - one for bfed and one for ffed. I know Carolynn uses the new charts (because she gave me one when I was asking her about ds2's weight ) but ds2's red book still uses the old ones. I hope I've got that right - Tiktok often posts about the charts...

Original poster
Dalrymps · 07/02/2008 16:12

2happy - not sure who susan fairbairn is? think i've heard her name mentioned...
fio - yes i'd rather they talk to me than each other so i can give my oppinion too!

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