Is this now the time to give up bf - how do you really know?

[Mung]

DD is nearly 10 months. I had originally planned to bf until 6 months, but I am still here doing it as it has always been the easier option for me. Now however, I am starting to struggle a little with it.
DD is a bad sleeper and I am tired all the time.
She seems to have a constant cold and a homeopath suggested I cut milk from my diet (but that means no coffee )to help her.
I am finding it a real tie and I feel I need a break (that sounds SO selfish).

A huge part of me wants to avoid giving her formula, but I also feel that I am not cut out for this anymore.

I don't want to just give up for selfish reasons, but how do you know when its your time to stop?

Im not sure. But I sympatize with you my lo is 8.5 ths and doesnt sleep either/ bumping this for you

Mung...if there is a chance her constant cold is dairy related (as the homeopath suggests), then giving her formula would not make sense.

How about calling one of the bf helplines? They will listen and will not tell you what to do. They will help you work out what might be manageble for you, with regard to bf, if you are worried about needing a break. Maybe there is a way you can continue without feeling pressured.

10 months - fabulous work. Agree with tiktok about not switching to formula because of dairy issues (you could if you wanted try some of the non-dairy milks for your coffee? We like soya milk...)

I think you are obviously in a tricky patch - it seems unfair to me that (IME) a lot of the benefits of bfing come after you have been doing it for a year or more - it starts to become easier and very convenient and useful, whereas the earlier months can be tiring and hard, depending on your child and your own experiences of course. It sounds to me like you are not whole heartedly wanting to stop right now, so maybe we can help you think of ways to make it easier to carry on for a while?

Thanks for the advice. You are right F&Z, I am not wholeheartedly wanting to stop, otherwise I would have, but when I get really tired it feels like its draining me even more.

I relised that moving to formula was not going to help with the 'dairy' issue, so it wasn't going to be a magic cure.

What bf helpline do you suggest? I am reluctant to call the NCT one as I am on the local brnch committee and don't really wnt to fall upon our bf councillor (a bit silly, I know, but I'd rather hve advice from someone Iwho doesn't know me on this one)

Thanks anyway for all the support

Agree re non-dairy milk in coffee - there are loads out there, and you should be able to find one you like. Even if you like a cappucino, you could maybe get used to soya if you really want to continue BFing.

Also, how much coffee are you drinking? Could this be contributing to low energy and baby's sleeplessness?

That said, I switched to FF from BF at 7 months for DS1 because he wasn't sleeping. It didn't make a blind bit of difference! He didn't sleep 7 to 7 until he was 11 or 12 months. Which is why I'm still BFing DS2 aged 10 months...

Finally, don't let yourself be pressured either way. If you want to give up, then you've done really well. If you don't, then someone like Laleche league could help.

The homeopath suggested that Soy wasn't a good idea as there are other allergy issues. I bought some rice milk and not only is it watery, but it has extra salt added.

I have about 2 or 3 cups of coffee a day and I have cut that down from before I make sure that I dont drink any in the afternoon.

Can anyone help? Still feeding 2.5yr son, tried everything to stop but he is hvin nne of it!! Still feeds like new born at night , I even asked doc for something to dry milk up. I am so tired!!!

There is also almond milk which you can try, or you could try Lactofree which is still milk and tastes just the same but has the lactose removed. It might not work as it might not be the lactose your DD is sensitive to.

You have my sympathy re DD being a bad sleeper. My DS is too and it is so hard. Would she accept a bottle of EBM from your DP in the night? I know it is still work for you to make it but I have a night a week in the spare room with ear plugs in and have done since DS was about 6 months old and it makes a huge difference to how I feel. With EBM you can make a bottle up and leave it by your bedside until the morning so there would be no reheating bottles for your DP. Might be worth a shot.

Oat milk is supposed to be very nice - thicker and more creamy -that might be worth a try.