Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Stopping breastfeeding after just 3 days

37 replies

BBTOOC · 30/07/2022 04:30

Just looking for some wise words and reassurance at day 3 with my newborn.

i know it’s incredibly early days, but breastfeeding just does not feel like it’s going to be my cup of tea at all.
one reason among very many, is that despite midwife telling me I have good latch, I am in agony through out every feed.
I have another midwife visit today so will be telling her hoping she won’t try to convince me to stick to it.
i feel really bad for wanting to quit, but I am obviously an emotional wreck anyway due to the hormones, lack of sleep (total of none in 4 days due to long labour followed by emergancy C) and I really feel like this will be one less thing to stress about and I can focus on the other things I’m struggling with and also share the responsibility with My partner (who has had plenty of sleep these last few days in my opinion 🙄)

anyway, sorry for the rant… but any advice/reassurance would be greatly appreciated!

OP posts:
Goodskin46 · 30/07/2022 04:37

It does hurt in the beginning it doesn't mean anything is "wrong", your choice but 3 days strikes me that you haven't given it enough time. 💐On your new baby.

Teaandcrumpets95 · 30/07/2022 04:41

Congrats!

Do whatever you feel is right, you don't anyones permission to stop if you want to stop.

But, it is normal for some pain and discomfort at the beginning. I hurt for about a week. I'm also assuming your baby is probably cluster feeding to bring your milk in and establish a supply. This is rough but it doesn't last forever.

Again, your choice so what is right for you and your family. But I'd give it a couple weeks then see how you feel, these early days are not a reflection of how it will be.

Slimemonster · 30/07/2022 04:44

It is early days - congratulations on your baby.
If you don't want to do it then don't force yourself too.
If you do want to do it then search out plenty of support from infant feeding specialists to observe you so you can tweek things to make it less uncomfortable.
You and baby both need to be happy in your decisions either way.
X

tealandteal · 30/07/2022 04:51

Introducing a bottle doesn’t have to mean the end of breastfeeding if you don’t want to stop. You can ask for more help with positioning if you are still in pain when feeding, or try nipple shields.

You can offer baby some formula with a 5ml syringe, doidy cup or bottle to give yourself a break. With DS1 we topped up with formula by syringe for 3 days and with DS2 he has one bottle per day. Do what suits you.

Is your partner taking the baby when not feeding to allow you some sleep? Getting a little sleep will help you to think more clearly.

RoseValleyRambles · 30/07/2022 05:00

If it's agony throughout, something probably isn't right. See if this can get support with the latch, an expert check for tongue tie, or even try expressing and bottle feeding due a bit to give your boobs a break, then gradually shift back to full breastfeeding if you want to at a later date, once you've worked eased into it. No shame if it's not for you - you're already running on empty so don't feel you have to be a hero or martyr.

You may find that a few bottle feeds give you the break your boobs need to recover - or that combi feeding works better for you. Nipple shields are also worth a try, depending on what's causing the pain.

Hugasauras · 30/07/2022 05:07

Nothing wrong with stopping if you want to; but if you do want to breastfeed and are just finding it hard right now, rest assured that this is the hardest bit.

With breastfeeding, once you make it past the first 3/4 weeks, things get substantially easier and (IMO) a whole lot easier and more convenient than FF. It's just about getting over that hump. Pain could be because the latch isn't right, or it could be just a short-term issue while your nipples adjust to suddenly having a little human sucking on them for hours.

Real-life support is invaluable, so ask your midwives for help at every opportunity and ask if there is an infant feeding team who can help you.

But it's fine to stop; it's just important that you aren't doing so because of lack of support or for a short-term issue if breastfeeding is important to you.

Misty999 · 30/07/2022 05:11

Go for it do what's best for you don't listen to anyone else do what you need to do x

Cadot · 30/07/2022 05:18

Has your milk come in yet?

It does hurt at the beginning but if you persist it will get so much easier. Once you've got going breastfeeding is so much easier than bottle feeding - no going downstairs in the dark and cold to make up bottles whilst baby screams - just pop out a noob while everyone's cosy and still half asleep. Out and about as well.

DH can give a bottle or 2 to give you a break once your supply is established.

Cadot · 30/07/2022 05:20

Sometimes the pain can be a tiny adjustment. I remember with DD just a tiny position change to where her nose was made a huge difference. If you have a patient and experienced midwife or lactation co sultant they should be able to help.

Helpmymum · 30/07/2022 06:10

If you don't want to stop try some nipple shields, honestly makes all the difference if you've got sore/cracked nipples!

Fluffybaker · 30/07/2022 06:29

Firstly, congratulations on your little bundle of joy!Flowers

Secondly, and I say this gently - it's your body, energy and time. You don't need to breastfeed or continue with it any longer than you wish to. If you want to share the load, please do. You need time to heal too and to have the good drugs too after your C-section. Smile

Original poster
BBTOOC · 30/07/2022 09:01

Thank you so much everyone for your words, as you can tell by me posting that at 4am this morning I was at the peak of a seriously low patch!

I have since managed a couple of hours sleep and thinking a lot clearer.

I would like to try and persevere to get through the rough first few weeks! So should have the midwife visiting me again today so will get her to help me again with latch and take it from there, But I won’t feel guilty if it doesn’t work out in The end.

PS, my partner has been amazing doing what he can to support us as he also adjusts to this new way of life… I think I was a bit resentful at 4am as he snored away along side me 😅

OP posts:
dolphinsarentcommon · 30/07/2022 09:05

Hope you have a better day today OP Flowers

Singleandproud · 30/07/2022 09:15

Congratulations on your new baby.

Firstly, whatever decision you make is fine it's not up to the midwife, HV or us how you feed your baby.

However, saying that the first week is horrible, if breastfeeding is something you would like to do then it does get easier. The first few days I was full of adrenaline and on a high and baby didn't feed that much because they were sleepy too. Day 3 - 6 I felt like I'd been hit by a truck, the adrenaline had worn off, I felt bashed and bruised everywhere, I seemed to be leaking from everywhere etc plus my DD had woken up a bit and was feeding more as she became more efficient and my nipples hurt as they have to get used to it too.

I persevered and everything got easier after that first week, I ended up BF for three years but nothing was as hard as those early days.

Once you master how to lay down and BF you can feed and sleep at the same time. Breastfeeding women get a lower quantity of sleep but a higher quality of sleep as they enter the deep sleep cycle faster (I know it doesn't feel like it at the time though).

What other things are you stressing about?

Singleandproud · 30/07/2022 09:16

Also it's likely your partner will be back at work soon so won't be around to help out as much anyway. Its a lot more faff and work sorting out bottles than it is to whip a boob out when needed.

Wallywobbles · 30/07/2022 09:20

I couldn't cope with the pain either. I fed the first for 3 weeks and then got mastitis and stopped.

Second I did morning and evening for 5 weeks.

Honestly for me breast feeding was worse than childbirth.

Original poster
BBTOOC · 30/07/2022 13:17

Just seen the breast feeding support and feel a lot better!

we are going to try nipple shields and see if it make life a little easier.
mans I have been reassured that it is of course most important to have a fed baby so if formula ends up being the case then so be it.

thanks again for the support all!

OP posts:
Asiama · 30/07/2022 13:24

The most important thing is that your baby is fed and has a mum in good mental health, so please don't beat yourself up if you decide to stop. But it does take a few weeks to get the hang of it. And remember, it doesn't have to be one or the other - you can combi feed with a mix of formula and breast.

Milliesmmy92 · 31/07/2022 15:43

I stopped feeding from the breast around 5 days as like you even though midwife said she had a good latch I was in agony- I switched to pumping and giving her out the bottle until she was around 2 weeks. After that she was formula. Do what works for you. My daughter is now 5 months and gone from a tiny 5lb to being 11lb at her last weight check when she 3 months and she's even bigger now 😂. Don't stress, the first few weeks are the hardest. Xx

MajorCarolDanvers · 31/07/2022 15:47

If you don't want to do it stop.

But yes it does hurt at the start. But it eases after the first few weeks and then it doesn't hurt at all. So if you do want to continue please be assured that the pain really is temporary.

In all I found the first 4 weeks pretty hard. Then it started to get better and then it got easy. Easy, convenient, enjoyable, and never looked back.

Try just taking it a day at a time and then a week at a time.

CaptainCarp · 31/07/2022 16:06

Congratulations & glad you have managed to get some sleep & feeling a bit better!
Just reiterating others. "Fed is best" whether thats breast, pumped, formula or a combination.
Your milk should be coming in soon & then it does get "easier" as baby doesn't have to suck as hard to get the milk.

I am glad to be breastfeeding in the middle of the night when I don't have to leave the bedroom & just pop out the boob (fast food lol). BUT I have had moments when baby hasn't latched properly or decides to pull back whilst holding the nipple or I've woken up for the 3rd time in the night where I've considered if bottles would be easier! Almost 5 weeks in & I'm planning on continuing to breastfeed as we are getting the hang of it & I can't palm of middle of the night feeds to DP who is working anyway.

I may start pumping to see if DP can do an evening feed to give me a break in the next week or so.

Good luck with whatever you decide OP. Look after yourself.

LT2 · 31/07/2022 16:09

I remember it hurting in the first 2 weeks! It was so bad and they scabbed. The pain does end!

MrsMoastyToasty · 31/07/2022 16:09

As long as your baby is fed it doesn't matter about the source.
I stopped breastfeeding at 3 days (and was still in hospital).
I'm now the owner of a 5ft 10in , 16 year old.

Oblomov22 · 31/07/2022 16:23

First of all, you can stop. Any time at all. No guilt!

But before you do, Midwifes are NOT that great at breast feeding and you probably need to be referred or find out where the breastfeeding clinic is your local hospital. go and see them because they will be the best people to help you with latch etc. I went twice, best thing I did!

Thewheelsfalloffthebus · 31/07/2022 16:34

Day three? Are you still producing colostrum or has your milk come in? You can tell my hand expressing a few drops. Thickish and yellowish is colostrum, thin and white is milk. You are likely on the cusp of the pain getting so much better as soon as your milk comes in fully - your nipples will not be dragging on your baby’s palate in the same way and the milk is quite soothing on them too.
In my experience, day one was fine, day two and three hurt every feed for the whole feed, then my milk came in and let down hurt for 30seconds each feed but the pain totally stopped for the rest of the feed, then at 3 weeks breastfeeding was totally painless and actually I really liked the lovely sleepy happy feeling the hormones caused every feed.
If you’d like to breastfeed, persevere just a little bit longer.
If you’ve had enough and you don’t want to feed any more, or you want to mix feed, make the switch and don’t feel guilty about it. You get to make the decision about what’s best for you and your baby.