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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

HV advises bottle of formula at night - I'm so tempted...

16 replies

weeglenny · 17/01/2008 16:36

Posted this earlier but lost it somehow

I went to the local baby clinic yesterday as hadn't been since before Xmas - DS is 15 1/2 weeks and gaining about 1/2 lb per week which I'm pleased with BUT has been waking hourly every single night since Xmas I mentioned this to the HV and she advised giving him a bottle of formula in the evening. I really don't want to do this as bf has been going well so far, but I'm getting so tired that I'm really tempted Can any of you experienced MNers give me any advice on why he is waking and feeding so often? He wakes, feeds for about 10 mins (and feeds himself to sleep), I put him down then about an hour later he's awake again... I've tried co-sleeping but it makes no difference.

Not sure if it's related but he's also started teething (no sign of any teeth yet though). Anyway I'm hoping someone can give me some advice and hopefully tell me that this is just a phase and will pass - soon!?

OP posts:

FioFio · 17/01/2008 16:39

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lulumama · 17/01/2008 16:43

he is gaining weight beautifully isn;t he? your milk is clearly doing him the world of good... babies do have frequent growth spurts, he should feed as much as he needs to make sure supply and demand match. co sleeping will at least mean you don;t need to get up frequently in the night. teething might well be making him a bit grouchy and he is feeding more for comfor t too. it is a phase and it will pass!! ultimately, it is your decision as to whether to give a bottle, but it is not magically going to make him sleep through .. your baby does that when they are ready..do you have other DCs? can you rest more in the day/

sherby · 17/01/2008 16:45

Hello Weeglenny

I could've written your post! My DS is 5 months now bf and has only just really started to get better at not waking so much at night.

I really don't think giving any formula will make much of a difference (and i'm not saying that from a 'no you must breastfeed point of view). He doesn't sound overly hungry if he is only having a little suck and going back off to sleep. Perhaps he is just waking and needs a small suck to go back off to sleep. I suppose the problem comes in when it is not convienient to be woken so regularly and believe me I know it is not convienient sleep deprivation is hell!

We did co-sleep as I found that I could just latch him on and go straight back to sleep so I wasn't disturbed so much. I think sometimes we just have to accept that babies don't sleep like we do and like to check that we are still there when they wake at night. I really hope it gets better for you soon (and me lol).

One thing I found helpful and you might think it is rubbish but when I was up at night and feeding for the 50th time, I liked to think of all the other women all over the world who were sitting up and feeding their little babies back to sleep at the same time.

FarcicalAlienQueen · 17/01/2008 16:46

Just a phase - and speaking as someone who FF two of her babies from a young age I can reaffirm that giving formula will make no difference to whether they sleep longer or not.

tiktok · 17/01/2008 16:46

This is normal behaviour, weeglenny, and doesn't actually 'mean' anything

Perssiting with co-sleeping will mean you are less disturbed....no one ever claimed it stopped babies waking, or they shouldn't, but it does mean you can attend to his needs without fully waking up.

It is a phase.

You don't have to give formula - what a shame your HV lacks imagination as well as understanding

smallwhitecat · 17/01/2008 16:53

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WinkyWinkola · 17/01/2008 16:54

I gave my DS1 formula when he was seven months old to try and help him sleep better. Didn't make any difference whatsover. Wish I'd never bothered.

It's so hard, broken sleep. But co sleeping helped a lot.

StealthPolarBear · 17/01/2008 16:57

Not sure if this is a good idea but might a dummy help? If he just needs to suck to get back to sleep?

claireybee · 17/01/2008 16:58

Formula made absolutely no difference to my dd. Just meant I was making bloody bottles all night

Original poster

weeglenny · 17/01/2008 17:16

Thanks ladies for replies I guess I just need a bit of moral support, coz my Mum is also saying about formula or rusks

I know for his sake that bf is best, and as long as I know that this is just a phase then I will get through it - but after 3 weeks or so of hardly any sleep my judgement's a bit skewed. He is quite a sucky baby but won't use a dummy - prefers my boob or finger lol I don't expect him to sleep through, he never has, but a 3 hour stretch of sleep would be nice

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cmotdibbler · 17/01/2008 20:40

Has your DH/DP tried settling him at night ? Its hard for them when you get up and try to settle them as they see you and think milk, and then they can associate waking up and needing you to get them back to sleep.
The 'No Cry Sleep Solution' is a good night time parenting book that doesn't push formula, early weaning, or controlled crying.

kiskidee · 18/01/2008 03:14

agree with others to try persist with co-sleeping. you learn over time how to do it better, babies change and he will settle down some, given the time, and then there is also the No Cry Sleep Solution which is already mentioned. That book also helps you understand how infant sleep works which allows you to understand that this is just a natural phase so it makes it easier to accept that it is. It also gives you handy tips on how to gently get your baby to sleep longer while respecting their needs.

Ineedacleaner · 18/01/2008 08:24

With both of mine the bit around 4-5 months was a killer sleep wise for me. They woke hourly fed and off to sleep again, it only lasted a couple of weeks but boy was I knackered.
DD was on formula in the evening by this point and ds was totally bf so the method really made no difference. You are doing fantastically well bf and if you want to keep doing it then keep going it will pass.

Original poster

weeglenny · 18/01/2008 11:02

Thanks again

cmotdibbler and kiskidee, I'll see about getting the No Cry Sleep Solution book, and will also see if DH can perhaps try to settle DS - at the moment DH is sleeping in the spare room during the week and coming back into our room at the weekends, so tonights maybe the night to start seeing if DS will settle for him...

Ineedacleaner thanks too, I just need to know that this will pass soonish and that it's not forever

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Balthamos · 19/01/2008 02:03

This happened to us about a month ago - ie. when DD was roughly 5 months. I have no solution but i think lots of it has been to do with teething in our case. Also, her sleep was very disturbed by being at in-laws for a week over xmas. Also, i think she was having a growth spurt and therefore was hungrier. I was nagged into starting her on solids by well meaning family and because i was sleep deprived and weaker i did (which i really didn't want to do cos she has ezcema). It made no difference to her sleep, she got constipated and showed no interest in the food - so i stopped. So IMO, if solids make no difference, surely formula won't either? I really regret it.

She is 6 months in 3 days (where did the time go?!?!) and i started her back on solids this week as DP away on biz and i could no longer cope with the sleeplessness and now she is that bit older, she really took to the solids well and her sleep has changed overnight. So maybe if you can tough it out for another month, that could help?

I really understand how hard it is though and basically we all have to do whatever we have to do in this parenting game to get by. And as i have discovered over the last few weeks, lack of sleep can turn you into a freak and impairs your judgement, so good luck and do what is right for you and your family.

Original poster

weeglenny · 19/01/2008 11:38

Pleased for you Balthamos that your DD is now sleeping better and thanks for your encouragement I guess what I'm finding so hard (apart from lack of sleep of course!) is that I just don't know how much longer this is going to go on for - the pleasures of having children eh? I'm just going to stick it out for as long as I can - hopefully he'll start sleeping better before I crack

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