Teething/distracted 4 month old is hurting me and now feeding lots at night

[naturelover]

I'm so exhausted! She was down to one feed a night, is back up to two or three, because during the day she is so distracted. I do try and feed her in quiet, dim rooms so there's less for her to look at. Her gums are obviously bothering her too though, endless chewing on her hands and lots of slobbering/pink cheeks. She fusses a lot at the breast and the endless latch problems I've had since day one are worse than ever because she latches on and off endlessly, and when she pulls off she usually stuffs her fist into her mouth immediately for a good gnaw.

Any suggestions? I'm worn out by it all.

bump

Bumping again for you as I am having something similar with 3 month old ds. I noticed two little white buds behind his gum today, wondered if this means teething or if all babies have them this early! he too is slobbering and chewing his hand constantly and getting v angry with my boob. Fingers crossed we both get some advice

DD did the frequent night feeds to me at 4 months. She'd been giving me 4 hour stretches of sleep, and suddenly started waking up every other hour for a feed .

In our case I think it was a prolonged growth spurt while she tried to master rolling - as soon as she could roll over both ways (and over and over and over...) things got back a bit more normal.

Her first 2 teeth came through without too many problems, but her 2 top teeth are giving her a bit more grief. We're using a combination of bonjela, Nelson's Teetha granules and (when all else fails) Calpol. I've also found DD stays a lot more focussed when she's either v. hungry or v. tired - otherwise she plays around, and has now decided either nipping or getting a good handful of nipple and digging her nails in is a REALLY good game !

Sounds like you might have a growth spurt combined with the teething . Can you have a "be nice to me" few days? Dd's 4 month "blip" lasted 2 weeks, and by the end of the first I was really starting to struggle. Then I decided that actually I didn't HAVE to do a lot of the things I was trying to get done and went back to doing the bare minimum above eating, sleeping and feeding DD while repeating "this, too, shall pass" ad infitum. And it did.

You will get through this.

Thanks Tangle.

DD is definitely more focussed when she feeds at night, with no people or noises to distract her. I've cut down on outings because feeding in public is just so stressful for me, with her latching on and off with all attempts at discretion out of the window.

Last night I tried some cluster feeding in the evening and she only had one night feed!

I think I will ring my local bf counsellor to see if she had any tips. Mandler I'll let you know what she says.

Naturelover, bumping your post as I'm also going through something similar with my DS (3.5 months) although at the moment he's waking every hour during the night to feed did you get any tips from your bf counsellor?

Interested in what Tangle said too about her DD doing this while mastering rolling - my DS is trying to learn to roll over but is only managing to get up on his side...

BF counsellor said it could be the teething and advised using bonjela.

She advised me to review the positioning in case I'm holding DD the same way I used to but now DD's too long, ie I might not be making her reach up far enough to the nipple.

I read on kellymom that growth spurts and new developmental stages (ie learning to roll over) can make babies fussy at the breast.

Everything's a phase, eh?

my ds is 4 months old and on occasion really doesnt concentrate on feeding. What works for me is to remove him completely from the breast - sometimes even have to give him a dummy to let him soothe himself (as normally when he comes off he is wriggling and crying), then I try again 5/10 mins later and he normally feeds for some more time. Feeding in public is definitely worse when they start becoming aware of their surroundings. I find that feeding DS at home is much better for both of us.

So maybe try dummy (if you use one)
Or - try feeding more frequently during the day, including cluster feeds perhaps?
Oh and ashton and parsons teething powders are great! try them.

I don't mean to depress you but.... this happened to me at 4 months also. Thought we were doing so well doing from 11pm to 3... then 4 and a few times even 5am. Then went to 11... then 2.30 and then 5. 6 months now.. and we are still stuck to the feeding 3 times during the night.

He is normally breastfed and I definitely notice that he is taking less during the day and like you have tried everything to get him to take more. he just refuses to and pulls away. he is also teething and had a bit of silent reflux. The only times I can get him to take a decent amount of milk during the day is after a nap if he is still sleepy and we lie down on the bed (ie half asleep like at night!!!!)

I had to have someone look after him one night when he was 5 months old and he took 20oz during those 3 feeds. That was on top of an EBM bottle of 6oz at 7-ish. So from 6pm to 6am he had about 26oz of milk so its no wonder he isn't feeding much during the day! We are completely back to front now.

What do to... would also welcome the "answer" from anyone out there! HV said to feed him more during the day, so I have been offering him more often. But mostely he just pulls away and cries and more recently he is actively pushing the boob away.

I don't really want to use controlled crying at night as he is only 6 months and anyway with a 3 year old and a husband who gets up at 5am that isn't a practical solution at the moment even if I had the balls to try it. But maybe thats the only answer?

I give him a bottle of EBM at 7pm and sometimes again at 10.30 / 11pm (if I can get it done before he wakes up, which is less than 50% of the time!), so that at least gives me to the comfort of knowing that he has taken a big feed.

He is 6 months now so we are just starting solids. I am presuming (praying!) that this will improve things. But when he keeps refusing milk during the day other than starving him at night I don't know what to do!

Naturelover,

My ds is another milk vampire, except he is nine months old. Feeding (and sometimes biting) during the night but very distractable during the day.

I do the same as you & feed lying down in darkened rooms etc. etc. but it doesn't make that much of a difference. He does feed a little longer when I pounce on him boobs akimbo the moment he wakes from a snooze; this might help you too?

A few suggestions.

Re: the being worn out. What time does dd go to bed? One thing that helped me was to put ds to bed between half six and half seven, which gives me much-needed "me time" before he wakes. I can use this to sit in a comfy chair & watch TV with dh, or have a warm bath, or if I am really knackered, go to bed early.

A bedtime routine helped him go a little longer before his first night waking; ITNG, massage, feed then book (so not fed to sleep) then cuddle to sleep. First and second time he cried a lot but only whilst I was holding him, so I didn't feel too bad; third time he went to sleep almost immediately and most nights still does. It means I get four even five hours in the evening.

Co-sleeping helps me with the night feeds too but I know this isn't for everyone.

Also I keep the lights dark at night so he learns to associate night with sleep; he now goes about four hours between night time feeds (although sometimes they roll into one and I wake up at seven barely remembering how often he's fed) whereas he was feeding two hourly.

I hate to say it, but weaning ds made no appreciable difference to his night time sleep. But the time in the evenings, and the co-sleeping made me much less worn out.

As for the teething, ds luckily never showed much signs of teething discomfort so I've no suggestions here!