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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

Newborn won't open his mouth properly to feed

20 replies

Naetha · 06/01/2008 07:48

Apologies if this post is sounding rather desperate, but I've had a pretty tough night.

DS is 2 days old - pretty much trouble free labour, chilled out in hospital, discharged after 16 hours with no problems.

He BF'd a little in hospital, but seemed much more interested in sleeping and looking around than feeding, although when he did latch, it was good. I'm now having real problems feeding him at all. First of all he doesn't seem that interested in feeding at all - it seems he'd rather be sleeping or just cuddling.

The main problem I'm having though is getting him to open his mouth properly - he'll either only open it a tiny bit and just get the nipple, or he won't open it at all / close it too early and suck frantically at his lip. He seems very reluctant to open his jaw at all to feed, although he'll happily have it wide open when rooting or crying. He's happy to try and suck on anything else, just not interested in my boobs at all - I know I'm not, but what with all the hormones and everything, just makes me feel a failure. DH tries to help, but all he does is repeat to me the technique to get him to latch on (where to aim for etc) - I know that, I just can't get DS to open his bloody mouth!

He's currently having about one half-decent feed every 6-8 hours, but even then it's only for about 15 minutes, then he spits the nipple out and won't take it back in or falls asleep or both. When we have got him to latch, it seems to have been a fluke - i.e. he's yawned and I've taken the opportunity to try and shove the boob in and it's worked.

We had an hour of skin on skin contact last night - me, DH and DS, but all we got out of it was 10 minutes on one boob.

My milk has come in, so I'm less worried about supply issues, but concerned about DS getting the nutrition and hydration he needs. I'm also slightly worried as after 56 hours he still hasn't had a poo (although there was meconium in his waters and he's had a pooey bum from "wet" farts, although this is probably a seperate issue (that lack of feeding isn't helping).

Any advice will be gratefully received - MW is coming back today (and will be sending us to hospital if he still hasn't pooed by then) and I really want to get it sorted. Just need to stop him sucking his lips, and start him sucking my boob!

OP posts:

Flllightattendant · 06/01/2008 07:54

Oh poor you!

Has the mw checked for tongue tie? That can cause problems but is easily dealt with if you know it's there. I'm not wise about it but there are others on MN who know the ropes x

yogimum · 06/01/2008 08:17

Try not to worry it can be like this the first few days. You just need to encourage his natural reflex to get him to open his mouth. It may take a while as some babies are just very sleepy/not very hungry. Try brushing his lips against your nipple and hopefully he will respond. My ds had tongue-tie so have the mw check for this. Hopefully someone with more expertise will come along soon. Good luck x

yogimum · 06/01/2008 08:18

Congratulations btw.

Original poster

Naetha · 06/01/2008 17:09

He doesn't have a tongue tie, but he was quite a chunky baby (8lbs 10oz) and apparently (according to MIL ) heavier birthweight babies tend to feed a lot less than normal in the early days.

He's had 2 half-decent feeds today (and finally pooed!), so hopefully he's getting better. I think he only really makes an effort to feed when he's really hungry, so cruel though it sounds, I need to ignore (to some extent) his early feeding cues.

Thanks for the help

OP posts:

MrsBadger · 06/01/2008 17:18

have you tried the 'breast crawl' ie lying back with him skin-to-skin on your chest/tummy and letting him find his own way to the nipple?

obviously not great for feeding in public but worth a bash to see if he can get a decent latch on his own. Once he's done it once he may remember how the following time...

smallwhitecat · 06/01/2008 17:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Monkeybird · 06/01/2008 17:31

Hi - sorry you're having a bit of a rough start but it's good that he has pood today and had some small feeds. was your midwife any help at all?

i'd recommend ringing one of the BF helplines (yuo should have been given the numbers when you were discharged?)

in the meantime, you can try stroking downwards with your nipple, compressing the nipple slightly (like a 'sandwich' to flatten it so he gets a better grip - just until he's more practiced at latching on himself, or try stroking his toplip from side to side, and then just waiting a little bit longer. You then have to sort of 'catch' the wide gape very quickly... If mine didn't get on with that one wide gape, they often lost interest in a second go and got frustrated...

You could also try expressing or squeezing a bit of milk onto the end of your nipple to encourage him to work out what all the effort is for?

Good luck but deffo ask for help from a BF counsellor on the phone if you don't get anywhere...

Monkeybird · 06/01/2008 17:31

Hi - sorry you're having a bit of a rough start but it's good that he has pood today and had some small feeds. was your midwife any help at all?

i'd recommend ringing one of the BF helplines (yuo should have been given the numbers when you were discharged?)

You could also try expressing or squeezing a bit of milk onto the end of your nipple to encourage him to work out what all the effort is for?

Good luck but deffo ask for help from a BF counsellor on the phone if you don't get anywhere...

Original poster

Naetha · 06/01/2008 22:01

I tell a lie - he does have a tongue tie - I showed a picture of one to DH and he didn't think he did, but when he was bawling later on I had a peek and that flap of skin...stuff is definitely quite prominent. Will have a word with the MW about it when she comes tomorrow.

I haven't specifically tried the breast crawl, but we've had lots of skin on skin where he's had every opportunity to forage for his own food!

I think the main thing is that he's just not that hungry at the moment. I'd imagine that will change soon enough!

OP posts:

yogimum · 06/01/2008 22:08

naetha, I think I mentioned my ds has tongue-tie but didn't have a problem feeding so we left it alone on the advice of a specialist. I think you are right he is just not that hungry. Just keep encouraging him. Babies have to learn to feed well. Glad he had a poo!

MarsLady · 06/01/2008 22:09

he's not feeding enough. The lack of food means he doesn't have the energy to stay awake.

Do get in touch with one of the breastfeeding helplines

Association of Breastfeeding Mothers
Breastfeeding Network

If it's tongue tie you should get it sorted sooner rather than later.

But for now.. you need to wake him up to feed. Try feeding him lying down or in a rugby hold (his head at the breast his feet towards your back). Skin to skin as much as possible.

If he won't feed then try hand expressing milk into his mouth.

yogimum · 07/01/2008 08:01

Neatha, hope he is feeding better. I was in hospital for five days so ds laid on my chest the whole time and he just fed on and off all the time. My best friend is a breast feeding counsellor so she showed me ways of feeding him, like lying down which was great.

Original poster

Naetha · 08/01/2008 11:37

Things are improving, although we're still struggling a bit - twice at night (last night and the night before last) we've had to resort to giving him a bottle of expressed milk. The first night he took nearly 5oz of the stuff, and was obviously starving after a day's ineffective feeding and an hour of trying to get him to feed. Both times though, he's had a good breastfeed the next morning, so I'm not overly worried about nipple confusion as long as it doesn't get to be a habit.

In a way it was really frustrating to see how easily he took to the bottle - instantly he was gulping it down with no fussing or anything. I know breastfeeding is natural, but we both found the bottle so much easier. I'm definitely going to persist with BF though.

Mentioned the tongue tie to the doctor who said that as long as it's not interfering with taking a bottle, then she'd rather not do anything about it. I guess doctors aren't into BF the same as other medical people are

OP posts:

tiktok · 08/01/2008 11:43

Naetha, you need some good help.....try skin to skin and lots of self- attachment, rather than 'aiming' the nipple. I'd be concerned about you involved in expressing and giving a bottle - it's a hassle and you and your baby shd be feeding direct. The doctor's response on the TT issue is disgraceful. Try to get a proper diagnosis of the TT and whether it is affecting the bf, and if it is, you will need to see about getting it clipped. Lots in the archives about this.

is he pooing plenty now? Today, you should expect the start of soft, yellow poo.

Easywriter · 08/01/2008 12:00

Naetha - Congratulations! I had very similar problems with dd3 (now 7 weeks). She was a big baby 9lbs 6 and didn't feed for ages after the intial post-delivery feed. She also wouldn't open her mouth so we fed her by syringe (so as to avoid nipple confusion which can happen v. easily.).

Nothing too exciting, just a syringe, no needle (obviously). My MW showed us how to do it.

When she was on the breast she'd get my nipple. Ouch! In the end I bought nipple sheilds and bore the pain until she learned to open abit wider (only took a week or two).
By the way nipple shields also lead to nipple confusion but as with bottles, syringes, whichever solutions you employ, stop using them asap).

hth

Easywriter · 08/01/2008 12:02

oh also mw suggested feeding in a warm bath.

don't know why this works but was dd's first 'proper' feed.

dd is still bf by the way

Original poster

Naetha · 09/01/2008 18:26

Just when I thought I'd cracked it, I hit another stumbling block! DS has finally got the hint that it's my boobs that have the milk (rather than his baby gro or DH's neck) and has fed reasonably well the last two days. Unfortunately this has resulted in extremely sore and now cracked nipples on my part. Admittely having post-childbirth piles hasn't helped much either with sitting down being very uncomfortable!

My MW watched me feed the other day, and said the attachment was good, although the latch kept on breaking, which may be related to the tongue tie, or may just resolve over time. Basically DS will latch on fine initially, which hurts a lot (but my nipples are fairly soft and sensitive anyway) but then often within about 30 seconds the pressure will break somewhat and it will start hurting again, or it'll make a clicking noise with every suck, and just not stop hurting.

Any suggestions? Should I really push for getting this tongue tie sorted? The MW didn't think it was particularly bad, but said it may be affecting the latch.

OP posts:

fishie · 09/01/2008 18:44

well if you are in pain the latch is likely to be the cause and the tt is likely to be the cause of that. you must get this sorted out before it gets any worse. please do ring one of the helplines tonight, they can help you to get the tt diagnosed and decide what you need to do.

flibertyplus2 · 09/01/2008 19:19

This sounds exactly like my DS, I think you need to get the TT sorted ASAP. I persevered for 5 months and it didn't get any easier as he needed to feed more and more. I ended up staying in bed to feed constantly 2 days a week to catch him up as he was too tired to feed for long enough at a time. I also kept getting sore and had to syringe feed sometimes to give him enough energy to latch on for a feed.

This site has good info and tells you who divides TT near you

Baby friendly site (see TT menu on right)www.babyfriendly.org.uk/page.asp?page=154

I'm so glad we did it, DS fed straight away and latch was better immediately. Still breastfeeding and it's his first birthday next week.

helips · 10/01/2008 18:50

This all sounds very familiar to me. When my ds was born he slept for ages and wasn't particularly interested in feeding. Then when he did want to feed I had difficulty in latching him on. Sometimes it would literally takes hours to latch him on and we would both be in tears. I also got really sore. It turned out that he had a tongue tie which stretched itself over time. He is now 4 months old and I'm still BF, its no longer painful and he latches himself on easily. Basically, what I'm trying to say is just keep persevering, your doing really well and I promise it does get easier. Have you tried using lansinoh for your nipples, also try expressing some feeds to give your nipples a rest. It may seem hard to believe now but it will get easier, good luck!!

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