PLEASE ENCOURAGE ME THAT BREAST MILK IS BEST FOR MY BABY [SAD]

[lou031205]

Following on from my thread re: weaning,etc. I am being given encouragement that I might be less tired, and my DD more satisfied if I introduce an evening bottle, or occasional 'hungry baby' formula.

My friends (& husband occasionally) are all so sweet, and well meaning, but it is making me really feel as if they all think I can't do this.

DD is just coming up 5 months, and I suspect has been on huge growth spurt, leaving me, well , knackered! Also have 2 year old DD going through challenging stage.

As I've said before, fancied BLW, and don't think she is ready for solids yet.

I explained to my friends etc, that hungry milk just takes more of her calories to digest it, which is why she feels fuller, because her poor little tummy can't deal with it efficiently, but the response was "You know too much science", and "You don't make life easy for yourself do you?"

I have exclusively breast fed for 5 months, I don't want to undo it all now.

101 reasons to breastfeed your child

You are doing brilliantly. be very proud.

Hang in there lou! You are doing soooo well. Formula has no guarnteed impact on sleep whatsoever - quite apart from the hard-to-digest aspect. Think how gutted you'll be if you introduce ff and it has no effect on sleep.

Am actually quite at the comments you have received. How sad that bf is so often undermined.

Keep going!!!!!

Breast milk is best for you baby, you know it is true. Hungry milk just contains starches and fillers to swell her tummy so offers no real benefit.

Ride it out, it will get better. And think of what a great job you are doing for her.

PS And tell your friends you want to keep bfing and need their support.

oops meant your baby, not calling you baby!

You know you're right and they are wrong. And the science/easy comments are just there to undermine you because you do actually know more than them.

Don't be sad because they're undermining you. Take a deep breath and remember that it's the breast milk that has grown your lovely baby this far and of course with two you're knackered: that won't change because of a bottle!

Maybe see if you can get an afternoon off by palming off DD on a playdate and trying some EBM with your husband? Or even just a long bath and early night?

You're doing great and those undermining types don't understand BF like we all do so come here for a big HUG!

sounds like your bf is going really well - good going xxx

I bf and have other kids - if I didn't bf don't know how I'd manage with a bottle in one hand & baby in the other. At least with bf you have a free hand.

oh yes and the faff of bottles. Just think of all the faff you don't have.

do keep at it, you are right it is a growth spurt and will pass. YOUR instinct is all that matters here you know best for your baby you have done fantastically and can keep going

have a look at this and you will realise that what you are doing is brilliant!

Lou, you know you're amazing. You and only you are producing this wonderful milk for your baby that will change to suit every aspect of its needs for a long time to come.

Do not let anyone's remarks take that away from you.

Of course you're knackered you have a 5 month old baby to look after!

If you, yes, you no-one else, want to express some milk and get DH to give some milk occassionally then that would be a way forward rather than weaning and/or introducing formula and not 'undoing' your ideas of exclusively breastfeeding (FWIW it can't be undone now, what you have achieved is there and always will be )

If you want the little extra freedom that may afford, after all your milk is likely to be pretty well established after 5 months, then do I'd suggest that, if you are perfectly happy to continue as you are then stick to it!

Well done for getting so far, as for well-meaning friends/family, tell them firmly but politely you are happy as you are and appreciate their input but would prefer support than suggestions.

IGNORE THEM!!! i had alot of negativity from various family members when i was BF DD and i just tried to let it go over my head!! it is more about the people who say the comments than who it is aimed at IMO!! i put alot of them down to jealousy and selfishness on their part as most comments were in the region of 'are you sure you are coping we will feed DD if you will just put her on formula!' i just said why waste my money when i have a free milk production team right here in my bra??!! they just wanted to feed DD and gain that little bit of control but as a mum you know what is best so just tell them to be supportive or keep their mouths firmly closed
xx ei xx

You don't know "too much science" you just care enough about your baby to be well informed. It gets soo much easier after 6 months - a positive pleasure - hang on in there

What does knowing 'too much science' mean?! This a completely different example, but I was in a presentation at work recently where me and my friend kept asking 'difficult' questions and eventually the speaker had to say "you know too much, this presentation is not for you" (ha ha). Essentially you are in the same position - don't feel bad about it! The information you have been given isn't slanted for someone with your particular knowledge. You don't know too much, you just know.

Keep hanging in their if YOU want too! Im breastfeeding DS2 and tried giving him formula at last feed to see if it would help him sleep through and it made absolutley no difference at all!

The reason I say if YOU want to, if you need a break then a bottle once in a while will be ok.

There is so much advice everywhere, theres nothing like trusting your own instinct.

"You know too much science"

People often start to get uncomfortable around bfing older babies. Just cos so few women get there I suppose.

Sounds like you're doing a superb job, and those comments are just like what people were saying to me when dd was 6 months old and I was BLWing. She is just coming up for 2 now and ds is 5 months and people are saying the same. It's a good job I'm stubborn!

i am starting to find it almost sinister that some people are so determined to keep babies away from breastmilk.

lou you are doing brilliantly at a challenging task. it is something that nobody else can do and i think that sometimes confounds them.

just remind them that they can help you best by helping you to feed, not by offering bottles or other substitutes.

I also tried formula on the advice of others to try and get him to sleep a bit longer. It made no difference, in fact it made him more windy and unsettled. So I went back to BF at the last bottle and now at 6 months can't say that I have exclusively BF . He is still waking twice or 3 times through the night to feed! I am hoping that solids over time will change this, but moving to formula is definitely not the answer. hang in there!

You are right Fishie,there is somethin g very sinister about the fact that breastfeeding women face this shit.
The formula companies have done a very good job of persuading quite rational people that bottle feeding is the normal thing to do.

Hello, I was going to go for 6 months BF only, and would have done had my DD not grown massively fast and by 4 1/2 months was top centile and feeding almost every hour! So I started introducing a bit of baby rice, which she was totally ready for. I say go with your baby, if spoons are already being grabbed out of your hands and your are getting no sleep due to feeing, then trying a little solids might be an idea. If you find it helps, that's good. If you need to increase breast milk after introducing solids for any reason, expressing will boost your supply in a couple of days. Make up baby rice with expressed breast milk. Don't bother with formula, esp if your supply is fine at the moment. You obviously seem to be happy with BF, it may be just that your little one is really hungry for something more.Baby led weaning may not necessarily start off in the same way for every baby. My 18 month old is now an big fan of all kinds of food, and enjoyed solids from the moment she tried them, almost as much as she loved my milk. Try what you think works, always remember BM supply can go up as well as down!

Thank you all so much! I can't tell you how encouraged I am by you all taking the time to reply.

I know my friends are just concerned for my welfare, I think they don't realise that so much of my welfare is tied up in doing the best for my baby. I KNOW I would truly regret giving in to tiredness etc, because I still really regret having to move my DD1 from breast to cup and formula when she was 7 months old (I had to go back to work 30 hours, to survive financially, and she refused every bottle known to man. So HV said that only solution was to completely stop breastfeeding so she only had one option )

I'm in a much better situation now, only work 5 hours per week, and don't go back till DD2's 1 anyway. Right now, I quite like the idea of her self-weaning when she's ready.

excellent post victoriansqualor

Moondog and Jinglyjen - have read your links, and have been topped up with knowledge that I just need to keep plodding.

DD2 had settled for the second night in a row (and about 5th night ever!) at 7pm, so at least I am getting a bit of an evening in!