Help DD is nocturnal - 3wks and feeding 8pm-3am what can I do?

[Caz10]

I'm exhausted! DD started feeding more frequently at nights about a week and a half ago, we presumed it was a growth spurt but it hasn't stopped.
She is normally hungry around 8pm. After that feed she basically does not sleep till 3 or 3.30am. She will feed well from both breats, go down and squirm for 20 mins tops before looking for another feed.
MW suggested letting DH settle her after feeds, which doesn't seem to make any difference. HV suggested a top up formula bottle at bed time but I really want to avoid that.
Any suggestions before I lose my mind?!

PS in the day timre she is very contented, feeds well and goes down or is contentedly alert for about 3 hrs at a time.

you must be shattered, sorry to hear it. mine did the same every month for about 4 months I'm afraid. I just rode it out with extra rest at weekends when dp was home, real babymooning stuff, in bed all weekend feeding ds1 and eating myself. also feeding lying down in bed half asleep and yes getting dp to do any changes and settling after a feed so i could go comatose ASAP. though that was hard, as my hormones seemed to keep me awake whenever the baby was...still it was nice to just lie there and recoup.

not much of a suggestion for help is it, 'just endure'? but it doesn't last for too long, just a few months.

i truly hope someone comes along with a miracle solution anytime now, for and for my ds2 due in 8 weeks!

we started a bedtime routine where my DD had a bath, massage and then a feed in a darkeded room... no eye contact, talking etc.
keep the daytimes for talking light etc...
Sorry if your already trying this already,
goodluck

That type of feeding behaviour is quite normal in a newborn but it would be easier for you if it fitted more into your natural waking hours. What do you do to help her distinguish day/night and switch her day time pattern to evenings. I'd suggest you keep things very quiet and low key, minimal lighting, nappy changes etc. Do you have any sort of winding down period, if so perhaps start it earlier(ie bath at say 6). It will come in time, 3 weeks is still very young and in 3 weeks time she could be quite different again.

Thank you all...trying to do the light/dark thing...finding it tricky as so dark and miserable outside just now, also as a newbie I find I need quite a lot of light to check her latch, change nappies etc - tried doing both in the dark and it led to disaster! We will persevere..

Hi Caz - sorry to hear you're still struggling - but well done for keeping at it. One thing a friend of mine suggested to help my ds start learning night from day was to take him out for a walk during the day. Not sure how it's supposed to help.. !

I also use a low light in our bedroom, with the switch within reaching distance, so can switch it on when feeding/changing and then off again when ready to sleep. Sometimes the light stays on all night (when I fall asleep!), but as it's low and 'different' to the main light/daytime, it may help... ? And we don't talk (unless ds is upset, and then I quietly shush him to calm/reassure him).

I think it's working, as he's sleeping better, and bedtime is the ONLY time our ds will lie flat on his back whilst awake (he's a very active little chap, and hates being put down anywhere... )

I did also give our ds to my dp for a while during the night when things were really bad and sometimes he would quieten down once he was away from me and my milk..! Not often, tho...

I've also been using my iPod when he has a bad night - just helps to pass the time (being a complete saddo, I load it up with episodes of the Archers and Women's Hour but, hey, anything's entertaining at 3am!!)

I really do feel for you, but it won't last forever. xx

Thanks Sufi! Now just need to persuade DH that I need an Ipod ha ha!

Tried a bit more of a bedtime routine last night and actually got a bit more sleep! Not much but hey, anything is better than none at all.

Also trying to strike a better balance between keeping myself awake and keeping things low key for her.

We will get there I'm sure. How are you getting on? How old is your LO one now?

Hey there.

Ah, I'll shut up about the iPod!!

DS is 7 weeks now, lots of ups and downs (last night was horrid.. But I've got a cold, so less robust than I usually am - I ended up handing him to dp at 9am and staying in bed til midday just to catch up and still felt grotty all day)

But, I think on the whole things are getting better. Some signs of a 'routine' - but realy being led by him. It's lucky he's cute is all I can say...

BTW - Happy New Year! xx