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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

Problems breastfeeding 1st baby. How was it for next baby?

15 replies

crimblecrumbles · 12/01/2022 21:05

I tried to BF my DD but it wasn't to be. She would never latch properly, I didn't have enough milk, she was losing weight, I constantly got mastitis etc etc. She took to formula really well and that was that. I am now pregnant with my second baby and I really want to try again. In my head I think it's going to be easier and I feel like I know what to do but that is probably me in my dream world!
Just wondering what people's experiences were second time round when you struggled 1st time? Was it easier? Did you have the same problems?

OP posts:

MNHQ

JoMumsnet · 13/01/2022 10:51

Hi @crimblecrumbles, we're just giving this thread a bump in case anyone's around to give you some advice and reassurance.

MissingMo · 13/01/2022 10:58

Hi, first baby DD I struggled with the relentlessness of it, and gave up 3/4 months in. I accidentally sabotaged myself by supplementing with bottles which diminished my supply. Second baby managed to keep going until he was over 1 year old.

Hullabaloo31 · 13/01/2022 11:02

My first was so hard, he had a tongue-tie and all the associated colic and feeding problems that went with it. We persevered and got there in the end but I dreaded doing it again. My daughter knew what she was doing from the word go and it was a breeze! Good luck. x

MerryMarigold · 13/01/2022 11:07

I had a lot of issues in my first 4-5 months with my first. He self weaned at about 9 months. Then I had twins. One of them too a while to get the hang of it but it was reassuring to know it was him not me as my DD was great! With all of them I did one formula bottle per day when very young so dh could be involved and I could sleep but that stopped around 2-3 months as they didn't want it anymore. I fed the twins till 18mo and I loved it. I was so sad to stop but I went through a difficult time and my milk stopped.

Original poster

crimblecrumbles · 13/01/2022 15:24

Thanks! I'm hoping it will be easier. My DD was like the 3rd baby I ever held, and then tried to BF! I had no idea what I was doing

OP posts:

Honeybae · 13/01/2022 20:58

Had so many issues with my first - low supply, mastitis, thrush; he took 4 weeks to get back to birth weight and never slept.
Second is now 7 weeks and although I had sore nips for a couple of weeks at the start, things are going really well! She sleeps loads and comes off when she’s finished (my DS never did this!)
I read somewhere that Mums who had issues with supply with their first don’t have the same problem with the second - obviously can’t be the same for everyone but it’a been that way for me.
Good luck OP

Fantasmic143 · 13/01/2022 21:04

I also had a torrid time with the first - I remember at 6 weeks saying 'I can only do one more feed' and kept saying that before each one!

With DS, it was like he'd read the book on what to do - always had the right amount of milk, he did the 20 mins every 4 hours thing and it was an absolute breeze in comparison. It was a good thing because I had a toddler to entertain, too - I remember saying to him that I wouldn't be able to sit around like a cow so he had to just get on with it!

They are now 23 and 19 so these are long ago memories. Good luck, OP, and try if it is what you want. There is great support around.

Volhhg · 13/01/2022 21:08

Second baby was much easier, it wasn't without problems to begin with and the sore nipples were just as bad. But I think it was all much less shocking and I was well prepared for problems and the lack of sleep. Actually the sleep was better the second time because I wasn't having to supplement with formulas and breast pumping. The midwives were a bit obsessive about the baby gaining weight the first time and so was pushed to do top ups within the first week but I've since learnt that it wasn't completely necessary since he was well and soiling nappies frequently. Second baby I ended up breastfeeding exclusively as we managed to get through the first month of struggles. I think the first baby it's very hard to deal with when things don't go with the feeding script

ItWorriesMeThisKindofThing · 13/01/2022 21:10

Like the difference between night and day! I did my reading and got some help second time around and was just generally both more prepared for issues, and more relaxed about going with the flow if there were any issues, if that makes sense. It ended up being a lovely experience.

Volhhg · 13/01/2022 21:11

I think it's just easier to accept you will have a baby stuck to your breast endlessly the second time round!

Grumpyosaurus · 13/01/2022 21:15

My second was loads easier than my first, who took days to get a good latch.

The sore nipples were still horrendous though, until someone said by all means get a good latch and tummy-to-tummy, but also get your back right up against an upright chair back or whatever. God knows why, but that helped loads. I sat bolt upright in bed for night feeds for the first few weeks, my back against the headboard, till my nipples toughened up again.

MrsGhastlyCrumb · 13/01/2022 21:28

I had so many issues with my first- I now know that what I needed was advice and support. I did persist and we got there in the end but still ended up mixed feeding. Two things I didn't know: nipple cream is vital, and cluster feeding is a Thing. She was large too, so extra hungry so my partner insisted we give her some formula.

My second needed NO guidance at all. Literally the first thing she did as she was passed to me was rootle straight for the nipple, and that was that. It made such a huge difference that she had that strong instinct; it probably also helped that it was a much faster, easier birth and she didn't have any meds in her system so was very alert. Also, by then I had nipples of steel. She must have fed til she was nearly 3 and still has a bit of a boob fixation.

mummabubs · 13/01/2022 21:29

Hi OP! So with my son 4 years ago I was really desperate to breastfeed and it never worked out. He wouldn't latch, then I got mastitis and I really, really tried. I went to every local free and private clinic I could find, paid for a cranial osteopath assessment, you name it, nothing helped. In the end I chose to express for a year, which I don't regret but it was bloody hard and I'd already decided I couldn't go through that again with a second child. I had my second child 7 months ago and she's exclusively breastfed. I think it was probably 50% me feeling more like I knew how to help her get started and knew it would take practice and 50% her just being much more into it than my son was. It still took a good 8 weeks or so for me to stop wondering if she'd latch or not, I think this is normal and it definitely got easier when she grew a bit as then she was able to latch more easily. Now it's so much easier not having to think about bottles or sterilising everything all the time and I'm glad I gave it another go. So yes, it's definitely possible! :)

MrsGhastlyCrumb · 13/01/2022 21:33

PS Something that really helped with my first was a visit from a really good health visitor who showed me some different positions to try: a bit like Extreme Breastfeeding. Ended up she liked to lie on cushions at my side like a rugby ball, under my arm. It made it so much easier.

Problems breastfeeding 1st baby. How was it for next baby?

Justkeeppedaling · 13/01/2022 22:19

I ended up having an op under ga when DD1 was 8 weeks old, to drain an abscess. That finished bf for me and I didn't even try with DD2.
They seem to have grown up ok.

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