Stopping breast feeding but won't drink from bottle/cup!

[moominmummy]

My dd is nearly 12 months and I am ready to stop breast feeding. I dropped the morning feed this weekend in the hope that it would spur her along to drink milk from a cup (or anything except me!). Unfortunately she will not drink milk from a cup or bottle and she will not eat cereal. She does eat yoghurts and cheese but I'm worried about fluid intake and calcium levels. My hv said she should be having a pint of milk a day! I feel quite emotional about it. This is the third time I have asked for guidance so sorry if I'm repeating myself. She takes sips of water during the day and I have to put water and milk in food. We only have to stop the night feed now but I fear it will be a struggle. Sorry this is a bit jumbled but thinking straight seems to have fallen by the wayside. Any words of wisdom?!?!

moominmummy, I'm in a similar situation though my dd is a bit younger. My LO has a lot of milk on her cereal but only drinks an ounce or two and we have had to struggle for over a week to get her to take that. She has water if she is feeling thirsty but often doesn't want it. My HV didn't seem too worried though. Can't offer advice but will be interested if anyone else can. Found it comforting to know that my dd is not the only one!

Moominmummy/Pootlepod - thank goodness... me too. I've bf my 5 month old ds until a few weeks ago when his weight started to drop. Am now trying to move to bottles/beakers (my mistake, he's never had them before) which just get spat out, thrown across the carpet! No way I can get enough milk into him yet via solids yet so I HAVE to win this battle. Any and all ideas very welcome - and hang on in there you two, we'll crack it

Hello folks. A mate of mine had just this problem, although with a younger baby. The only way she managed it was to go out and leave DH with the baby a =nd a bottle of expressed milk. The thought being that with expressed milk the only new thing would be the bottle. Needless to say tds screamed bloody murder but eventually took a coupleof ounces. It seemed that is his mum tried it the little blighter knew that the boobs were close. Also, dads are less emotionally upset by screams so tend to be able to persevere. So her tips were use their usual milk, get the dad to do it, go out yourself so you don't give in, and don't attempt it if they are tired. Also, for getting them to try cups, best to use the soft spout ones at first. HTH.

Thanks Poo2 - will give that a go. Hate to say Dad gets just as stressed out by the squealing as I do. Any more tips out there?

Hi I used a breast bottle made by aldiri, my baby uses it during the day and breastfeeds at night, he desn't drink more then 4 ounces at a time but I think thats usual with breastfed babies.

We've tried getting dh to give her bottle/cup etc but still has a hissy fit! I did go into mothercare today and found a cup with a straw which has had much success this afternoon with water. I am now reluctant to try it with milk in case she then won't drink water in it. Can't win. Dh has been getting up each morning and giving dd her breakfast along with a bit of milk so I guess we are just going to have to keep trying. I am going to keep doing the night feed for a while and then I guess it will be all out war at bed time. One step at a time. I'll probably end up keeping Petit Filous in business as dd has had 4 yoghurts today. I'm probably a bit paranoid about calcium intake but it does concern me. Thanks for all the feedback. It does reduce the panic knowing that I am not the only one with this problem. Tomorrow is another day and hopefully a happy one with dd drinking milk from a cup!!

ds1 was the same - we made sure he had lots of things like rice pudding. He has never has a pint a day (even now at 3). Some kids just don't seem to drink as much as others. DS1 drinks more now because he wants what his younger brothers are having. Have you any friends with similar age kids you can mix with - if they are drinnking then she might follow.

Most success we found was with the tommee tippee easy flow cups (I think) - pink and yellow cup with handles and a green spout thing.

You can get a lot of calcium from other sources - eg fruit and vegetables, have a look here

moominmummy, my dd stopped bf at 12 months and has never drunk milk from a cup, she's nearly 3 now! Don't worry yourself about it, she'll be fine, there are loads of other ways for her to get fluids and calcium (I totally agree with throckenholt). I admit I stressed about it at the time but, in hindsight, I think I probably made things worse by making such an issue out of it.

My ds is now 14 months and doesn't want milk in a cup when offered so I just don't offer it anymore. He does still have 1 bf in the evening though but I doubt it's a pint! All children are different and I think a pint is just a guideline.

Please don't worry!

Poggles - it is not unusual for babies to start dropping their weight at 5 months - they are far more active and using up calories. If baby is happy, peeing and pooing and healthy in every other way, then continue to B/F. If he is not interested in bottles do not force the issue. In the time that he fights over a cup/bottle, he could have had a breastfeed. Weighing of babies is an issue in itself - I think it is the biggest cause of anxiety with breast/bottle feeding mums.

On the milk issue moominmummy - when my children were weaned from the breast, 3 out of 4 of them did not have milk as a drink because they did not like it. They drank water/juice (teeth are fine) and ate yogurts, petit filous, cheese etc. There is calcium in other foods such as green vegeatbles, bread etc. If you do a google search you will find sources of calcium. I did a link an a previous thread that said it isn't necessay for children to get their calcium from milk. I will see if I can find it.
My eldest is 17 yrs and youngest is 11 yrs and they have had no problems with not getting milk to drink as a baby/ toddler. Interestingly, they all like milk now.

I think if she is thirsty enough she will start to drink something, but you may have a rather anxious time, perhaps trying to spoonfeed fluids into her, while you wait for her to make the move. There are lots of different cups, spouts, teats, etc on the market and I always found my children had certain preferences. What have you tried so far?

momminmummy, hopefully you can get some reassurance from the fact that this seems to be not uncommon, there are quite a few of us who've been there. I think I bought every cup on the market but my two both like the Tommee Tippee ones mentioned below, the Easy Flow ones. HTH.

slightly off topic mears, I agree with you on the weighing thing. I didn't take ds to be weighed, far less to worry about that way!! [was chastised lots of times for dd being under the average line and got tired of arguing my corner]

Thank you so much for all of the advice.
Clayhead - I think you're right, it's not worth stressing about it although I am finding that really hard. She had four yoghurts yesterday and drank lots of water.
I don't think she will take milk from anything until I have stopped the evening feed. That will be interesting!! Any ideas on the best way to do that??
I am feeling reassured by all your thoughts and don't feel like such a failure now. I think I have learnt my lesson that if I have another one a bottle needs to be introduced a lot earlier.
Thanks again from a much happier lady.

Thank you all for ideas and reassurance. Clayhead/Mears - you're right, the whole weighing business sends me into a cold sweat, so I'm much happier knowing it's such a common issue. What is 'normal' anyway?
My main worry over getting ds onto bottles is that as a very late starter 40-something Mum, if I want a second baby I have to get a move on... but that's another subject. Thanks all, and good luck Moominmummy

Hi there. My baby is 12 weeks old and and we are having terrible trouble getting her to take the bottle of expressed milk. I am hoping to go out for the moring and want to leave the baby with my husband. We have tried giving her a small bottle with a few ounces in, but she screams the place down and spits the bottle out. My husband has tried giving it to her, but things have got quite bad. Does anyone have any ideas to make things any better?

My dd is nearly two, i aimed to give up bf when she turned 1 but it never happened, and we are still having an occasional feed.

But my dd would never drink milk from a cup either, she would take a bottle (but i wouldn't recommend starting that now, cos its only another thing to wean from in the end). I just didn't fuss about it i offered milk in a cup in the day and at the most she'd take a sip, and at night she either had a bottle or b/f, but only ever had a couple of ounces, or quick one minute bf for the comfort more than anything. Slowly as time has gone by she has decided she likes milk in a cup more and more, and now at 2 yrs she only ever wants to drink milk, never water which always used to be her fave!

I always used a cup without a lid as she definitely didn't like any of the spouts on beakers.

Hopefully your dd will "grow" into milk from a cup too!

Didn't know whether to post this but here goes:
I breastfed dd2 for 2 1/2 years as she wouldn't take anything from a cup or bottle - EVER - even water. It was really frustrating and
1 I didn't have MN for advice
2 My husband wasn't that much help
3 I don't think I persevered enough.

I put loads of milk into her food, but she only seemed to ever want liquid from me - i felt literally sucked dry (not to mention the spaniel ears I was left with .
The good news is she now loves drinking milk , whereas dd1, who I bf for a much more respectable 7/8 months, won't and would eat cereal with a seive if she could!!

Poggles - couldn't find my link. For your interest I got pregnant with DS no.3 when Ds no.2 was 7 months old. You can still get pregnant while breastfeeding

I am now on day 5 of no morning breast feed and dd still hasn't drunk any milk from a cup! She has upped her water up take slightly. I am still quite worried about it and called the hv who said she will drink when she is thirsty. Think dd is getting quite sick of yoghurts now! Broccoli went down ok. Keep suggestions coming and big hugs to anyone who is feeling like me at the moment!

moominmummy, sounds like you're doing well. Perhaps LO will get so fed up of yogurts, she'll take the milk! I've ended up slashing milk into most of her dinners to get half an ounce in here and there! I don't like the taste of milk so perhaps she is just like me!

pootlepod - I don't like milk either. She had one sip of milk this morning! I too am adding as much milk as poss into her food. I did actual
ly go in this morning and get her and she didn't reach for he breast so I think she has forgotten that feed sooner than I have. Thanks for support.

Yancey - you have to take it slow and keep trying - they can be very stubborn because they know what they like, and it is a defence mechanism to refuse anything unfamiliar. Best if your DH can do it when you aren't around - so breastfeeding isn't an alternative and she can't sense you. He has to keep calm (that is the hard bit !) and keep offering. Give it time - she will probably take it in the end. You could also try a cup with a spout - she may prefer that.

Help! dd was awake half the night and I'm worried that she is dehydrated and punishing me for giving up the morning feed. I'm really tired and feel that I should go back to the morning feed. Somebody help me out of this, please!!

OH my god its not just me mine is 10 months want to stop BF but so paranoid about fluids he will have a bottle at night and i know he likes water and juice he just wont drink it from a cup or bottle currently letting him sip it from edge of cup but this is very hit and miss and messy any one know of a product that would help have tried bottles and tommy tippee.

My dd is 7 months old, I have been back at work for 3 weeks so she now has formula in the day and I bf evening/night/morning. I had all kinds of trouble trying to get her to take forumula, she has always passionately hated bottles.

My hv suggested I give up day time feeding in one go rather than dropping one feed at a time as babe will realise if she holds out long enough she gets bf eventually.

I spent ages playing with her with the bottles so she got used to them as we had got to the point where she would scream as soon as she saw a bottle. We gave dd loads of yoghurt etc during this process but she still refused a bottle for 4 days!

I eventually used a Boots cup (no valve) and poured the milk down her throat with it. She suddenly seemed to 'get it' one day and started sucking from the cup. She will now - grudgingly! - drink a few ounces a couple of times a day but still has days where she refuses to have any formula at all. My hv said that 3 bfs per day would give her enough milk and not to worry about it.