Can I carry on another 2 weeks?

[Bellyrumble]

Hi everyone

Sorry long post but don’t want to drip feed

DS is 15 days old now. We had a very rocky start- he didn’t latch straight after birth and I had a bad tear that took 2 hours to stitch so he ended up having formula as first feed.

He then ended up on NICU (fortunately only for 36 hours and he’s fine now) but the separation didn’t help. Nobody helped us latch in hospital. I ended up exclusively pumping and bottle feeding him. It was exhausting/ hats off to anyone who does it!

Last week went to a breastfeeding clinic and the lady was fantastic- he’s finally on the boob (with a nipple shield) and he’s producing plenty of nappies.

However he does tire easily and will often fall asleep/ use me as a human dummy.

He has a tongue tie and our appointment is in 2 weeks time to rectify it

Last couple of days my supply seems to be dwindling- he seems hungrier than ever! I’ve just tried to express and only got 2oz off…. I was getting 4ish per feed when I was exclusively pumping! My boobs just feel empty all the time now. It worries me that he’s not getting enough from me, especially as he always seems hungry.

He had a formula bottle last night as an extra- he settled so well before bed, far better than when I feed him. I expressed to replicate the feed.

He’s back at birth weight (just) and gaining approx 16g a day, but I feel like he’s not going to gain much more or the recommended 30g/day until he’s had his tongue tie snipped I don’t want to completely switch to formula just yet if possible. If after the snip we need to switch, I’m open minded if it’s what’s best for his weight gain, but I’d rather get through the next 2 weeks first and see if any improvement once he’s had it sorted

How do I get my supply up and make it through the next couple of weeks ?! I’ve gone from looking like a page 3 model to having what feel like completely empty breasts!

I’d keep going as you are. Express as much as you can. We did combination feeding too it worked well for us. I sympathise with being a human dummy - we had the exact same problem. Mine had his tongue tie clipped too (it wasn’t a two week wait, that seems very long) which helped tremendously but I’d be cautious about pinning your hopes on that as it isn’t always the magic fix for everyone.

At his age their appetite increases a lot. The more he feeds the more milk you’ll make, so just keep going for now! Also your breasts now feel normal as opposed to engorged because your supply is settling down in response to how much your baby is feeding.

From now on your little one will bring on a let down when he feeds rather than all the milk being there already.

All sounds perfectly normal. Let him feed for as long or as short as he wants, whenever he wants.

Can you pay privately to get the tongue tie snipped sooner?

Also they cluster feed a lot at this age, it's normal.

Thanks all that’s made me feel a lot better

Midwife weighed him this afternoon and he is 7lb (he was 6lb 11 when born 2 weeks ago!)

Gonna keep going, keep doing exactly what we’re doing as it’s working for us and see where we are in a couple of weeks after his appointment

We can’t afford to go private unfortunately (although I have added him to my own policy, it’s not effective for a pre existing condition sadly and the excess alone is £200 which is a tad out of reach)

Keep trying to feed on demand but give an evening bottle in addition if you want to, I did this but stopped the bottle around 5 weeks once she got better at feeding

Oh wow, we only paid £200 for feeding consultation and snip. Crazy that you'd have to pay that just as excess!

It's totally normal for your boobs to feel less full- it's a sign they are becoming in tune with your babies needs. It's also normal to sometimes get less by pumping for various reasons eg you haven't done it for a while, the type of pump you're using, how relaxed you are. It doesn't necessarily reflect how much your baby is getting.

Again- totally normal for a baby to use you as a dummy but think of it the other way round- a baby uses a dummy as a surrogate boob. Breastfeeding is not just a source of food for a baby but a massive source of comfort. So it's again absolutely normal for him to fall asleep on the boob or want to go to your breast for comfort as well as for food.

It sounds like you're doing everything right. Try to let go of the rocky start and focus on the now which is a baby who is gaining weight and happy and healthy. Breastfeeding is a journey and it takes time and patience and practice. If you want to continue then there's no reason why you would need to change now.

Try not to add any more formula. As milk is a supply and demand thing.
The more baby is on you the more you’ll produce- we often say in clinic that babies feeds today are putting in their order for tomorrow.
Good luck cx

I had similar and my babies tongue tie not only caused her to start losing weight but also trashed my supply.
Triple feeding saved us - i.e. a combo of breastfeeding plus pumping.
Usually you BF first, then pump and give your baby a bottle of the expressed BM. It will save your supply and get your baby gaining better, but is a lot of work in the short term - and is in reality only possible if you have very good support (ideally your partner giving the bottle feeds and helping run the show at home). Until you can get the tongue tie sorted and can go back to EBM.
I would really really recommend contacting an IBCLC for advice whatever you decide to do though.

Power pumping Once or twice a day is maybe another option

Don't worry! This all sounds really normal, including you feeling like nothing is coming out. It is, snd it's exactly this suckling for demand which stimulates your body to create more. Also expressing is NOT the same as a baby suckling and is waaaaay less effective at drawing milk to begin with as your body is much more responsive to the baby. My advice would be to stop expressing today as you are effectively making it much harder for yourself. Your body needs energy to create milk and if you're trying to express to bottle feed and breast feed you are not giving yourself a chance. You'll be able to express sure, but I would wait a bit. Let your body catch up first snd I promise it will, you'll be amazed. It takes three weeks for this process to suddenly ease and for you to feel like you have milk in there - you'll know because your breasts will feel hard and the baby drains them much better than pump. Also if you're pumping too much and not feeding in early days you run the risk of engorgement for that reason - so I really would forget that for now. Just get feeding your baby on demand as much as they want. It's not just about feeding it's about contact and bonding and also making sure you sit down and rest! Tongue tie is really not a huge deal/ mine had it but he was thriving and they didn't want to touch it. Latch is tricky at the start but again is REALLY early days you'll get there. More reason to leave the pump and just spend days in bed skin to skin feeding. Try different positions and see what works. Pillow under baby and support your back across where your bra strap us so you don't get pain... good luck!!!!!!! PS if you do want to pump after first month or two do it on a schedule. That way your body knows to supply more at a certain time... it took me a good while to build up and I would pump mid evening before bed after eating and a few hours after last feed. It's ALL about energy. Your body can't do it without rest and food. If you're running around house and not resting this early you'll struggle. Just feed eat sleep and repeat xx

Try not to add any more formula. As milk is a supply and demand thing.

@Isahlo that is dangerous advice, risking dehydration and another stint in hospital. They have combination fed since birth 15 days ago so supply will not match demand by any stretch at the moment, it will not suddenly increase to match the baby’s needs within a day. On top of that the baby has a tongue tie and is quickly falling asleep at the breast without having a full feed. There is nothing wrong with topping up with formula as needed.

My advice would be to stop expressing today as you are effectively making it much harder for yourself.

I was given this advice too - my supply dwindled very quickly because of that, I don’t recommend it. If expressing is working for you keep at it.

@Rosesareyellow

Try not to add any more formula. As milk is a supply and demand thing.

@Isahlo that is dangerous advice, risking dehydration and another stint in hospital. They have combination fed since birth 15 days ago so supply will not match demand by any stretch at the moment, it will not suddenly increase to match the baby’s needs within a day. On top of that the baby has a tongue tie and is quickly falling asleep at the breast without having a full feed. There is nothing wrong with topping up with formula as needed.

Op hasn’t mentioned dehydration anywhere, I haven’t said stop with the combi feeding, I’ve suggested if she can manage not adding additional feeds of formula and she can put the baby to the breast as much as possible this should help increase supply.

This is the standard advice we are told to give, this is my job. I’m really confused and absolutely don’t want to mess women's feeding journeys or endanger babies.

Thanks everyone for your further advice l- some really helpful comments

I’m carrying on, he seems to be getting hungrier and hungrier but I’m determined to get through to his tongue tie appointment and maintain my supply in the hope he latches better afterwards. If he doesn’t we’ll probably end up doing more formula than breast if it’s satisfying him more. He sleeps for ages after a bottle of formula- he screams after falling asleep on my boob if I try put him down, and roots for more (once I’ve lifted him off)

I’m also going to be more strict on visitors I think, as I’m finding it’s probably interfering with my ability to just sit andfeed/ have skin to skin.

Example today my sister, MIL and BIL all want to come over I can’t really say no to them but I feel I need to take action to get the supply up!

Lots of good advice already but I would also add make sure you are eating plenty of calories (more than you think you need) and drinking lots of water. My supply would really dip if I let myself get even slightly hungry or thirsty and I think the pressure to ‘get back in your jeans’ can affect the way you eat even if you’re not conscious of it.

I just kept my boobs out when family were visiting and acted like it wasn’t an issue. They can go away again if they’re scared of nipples.

Have you tried different positions to get a really deep latch? I found ‘laid back’ better with a tongue tied baby before it was snipped.
Don’t forget growth spurts and wonder weeks (if that’s still a thing!) his demand will be increasing, but your body should be able to keep up.
Good luck

Oh and you can say no to them!
Or if they do come over give them jobs to do elsewhere (cooking dinner maybe?)
Or as above - just sit there with your tits out

Have you got a haaka pump? I found this really helped increase my supply - feeding baby on one boob and haaka on the other. It's easy to do and effectively is kind of like feeding from both boobs at the same time.

Good luck mama, you're doing amazingly x

@Verbena87 interesting you mention calories! I’d said this to my husband yesterday- I’m back at my booking weight, haven’t been consciously dieting at all but I’m probably not having enough high cal stuff so he bought alllll the cheese yesterday and lots of other bits to try and help

I may sit there with my boobs out with visitors actually, it’s their problem if they’re bothered not mine!

Haaka pump a good idea, seems easier than using the electric one on one boob whilst feeding on the other
I don’t have enough hands!! Haha

It makes a huge difference I think - I was eating portions the size of my husband’s then half again, and snacking in the day, for most of the first year. It did not make me overweight, I think my body/baby were actually using it all. Your husband sounds a good egg: get on the cheese and crackers!

Hakka pump handy. I got a £50 electric pump got twice as much out with it than hand pump. Don’t let them sleep on breast, try swooping over as soon as fall asleep and breast compressions, that helped us, similar situation to you. Ask La Leche Leahue for advice they are great. Some nhs won’t do anything to a posterior tie I went private it was £200. If you can pump at least once between 2am and 5am. Good luck!

A quick update- bought a Hakka :) and still eating lots- my weight loss has slowed down a bit now which shows I’m maintaining/ eating better

I’m still feeding him myself but we gave him a formula bottle last night at around 10pm (I expressed with electric pump in lieu) and he slept so well- until 3:30am!! Hoping for the same tonight. The expressed breast milk we freeze or too him up or mix with the formula so it’s not wasted

It means I can then bring him overnight and he’s settling better

Still feeding loads through the day but that’s fine :) fingers crossed next week helps us if they do snip it.

Thanks so much for all the suggestions on here, I feel like we are finally getting somewhere! I might actually start to enjoy this parenting thing now we’re a bit more settled (I hope!)