Anyone used Baby Whisperer methods when establishing breastfeeding?

[mears]

Out of interest?

What is recommended for newborns?

I read BW before my third child, as my first 2 didn't sleep through for ages - and although I didn't follow it to the letter - I did find much in the book that helped. I BF DS until he was 1 year. He was a big baby (10lb 4.5oz) and I don't recall worrying about him being hungry and the feed intervals. Certainly he never had any problems with his weight! He also became a good sleeper. He slept through the night from about 4 months (with a dreamfeed) from 7.30pm to 7am and without the dreamfeed from 7 months.

At 15months now he's just dropped his 1.5 hour morning and 1.5 hour afternoon nap, and is instead having a 2 - 2.5 hour afternoon nap only. He's a really contented boy and can be left in his room awake, and will go to sleep. Sure, sometimes we need to go back in and shsh him a bit but he rarely wakes up in the night.

We never left him to cry (other than tired mutterings), and did find that the shsh-pat worked, and so did PU/PD - although they need persevering. She doesn't recommend letting babies cry it out - and the idea is that your baby knows you're nearby.

I think with any of these methods, you have to take them with a pinch of salt, and adapt them a little to find something that works for you. At the end of the day it's your child and you need to find something that works for you and your child...

depending on which book you have she recommends both cluster and dream feeding to help 'tank your lo up' and help them go a bit longer e.g. feed 3 hourly from 7am till 4pm and then cluster feed at 6 and 8pm and then dreamfeed around 10/11pm.

'The babywhisperer solves all your problems' book also sets out feeds according to weight e.g. a 5-6 1/2lb baby would only be expected to go 2hrs between feeds, a 6 1/2-8lb baby maybe 2 1/2 - 3 hrs between feeds and over 8lbs could go 3 hrs between feeds.

I found both the babywhisperer and GF useful in parts but took relevant points from each and adapted them for myself.

hmmmmm, have people here actually read the book? Cluster feeding is certainly recommended and she dislikes controlled crying. Pick up / put down is supposed to be for older babies

Fio - cluster feeding is when your baby constantly wants to feed, especially in the evening

cluster feeds

Well, ds was 10lbs at birth and still sometimes wants to feed 1 hour after the last one YEAR later! It's no problem really, as long as I'm not at work(!). What are these routines really about?

As with all these books, there are lots of opinions bandied about by people who either haven't read them, who churn out 'quotes' or opinions that they have heard before, or who disagree with the concept so much that they won't accept that they do work for some people.

There are also several valid criticisms of the methods.

They don't work for everyone.

Most people who say the book was helpful, don't follow it to the letter, and arguably they are the ones who will get the most out of it, by picking out the useful bits and adapting it to their situation.

IMHO following the BW methods won't be detrimental to bfing in most cases, but may not suit everyone.

No-one will know until the baby arrives, and it is up to your sister to decide.I'm sure she will be very grateful for your knowledge and support.

But don't write the BW off until you've read it. And whatever you think, it has sold millions of copies worldwide, many many people swear by it, and many of those mums will have breast fed successfully.

I didn't follow it by the way, but I have read it

I will definitely read it but it will have to wait unfortunately.

Thanks for the comments

Anybody is welcome to my copy - thinking of putting it on the bonfire with a few other books in a similar vein... BW shocking BF advice IMO

I don't know that thinking the BW or any other routine-y book is a good idea is necessarily the end of your helping your SIl Mears. I thought that GF's methods made perfect sense up until a few weeks before DS was born, when it suddenly dawned on me that a baby is a human being and not a puppy to be trained. I ended up carrying DS about in a sling all the time, feeding on demand and co-sleeping

Tapster- my friend did actually burn her copy of BW!

We did with both boys... we followed the pattern of EASY she doesn't give you timetables to follow so it was a case of feeding when DC woke up they then had awaketime bum change etc before falling asleep again (as very young babies)as they got older the pattern stayed the same but the frequency of the feeds and gap between feeds got bigger. HTH

IMO she does talk a lot of sense and she certainly is no Claire Verity but I object to

1. The idea she knows your baby better than you
2. That my absolutely chilled out, laidback (according to most people who met her) angel baby is in her definition 'spirited' because she wanted to go to sleep next to her mum and not alone in a cot - well duh.
3. Babies need to be taught to be independent from day one (she actually says this). For me, they need to remain attached and the independence comes naturally out of this security, and this is VITALLY important. So I personally couldn't really recommend the book.

Personally I think lots of her 'techniques' and routines (ew, I hate 'techniques' for raising children) are very practical for 6months and above. But LOs do fall into a pattern anyway.

Good excuse for a bonfire, glad I'm not alone

the bf advice is particularly pants imo and yes I have read it will try later to precis
the tone in particular is pretty dismissive and calls the evidence supprting bf "propoganda"

I put my copy in the bin, burning a waste of good matches!

Luckily I had established BF before I read this book. I did worry once I'd read it that my (perfectly happy) LO was feeding too often (every two hours) -- I think I started a thread on here about it in a panic. Then I saw sense and put this book where it belonged.

I am not a BF expert so not qualified to comment on how good/bad her advice is, other than that it made me worried when actually my LO was perfectly normal.

Oh, and don't get me started on how I feel about the phrase 'accidental parenting' ...

Reclaim it and be proud of your 'accidental parenting'!!!!

Night time routine was making sure that they had feed a couple of hours before bed, then bath, then another feed then put down to sleep at same time every night. At least I think that's what it was, that's what I ended up doing . Found it helpful because I was normally exhausted by that stage so helped me to have routine.

I agree that a lot of what she says is nonsense and she isn't that keen on breastfeeding (maternity nurses rarely are because it makes them a bit redundant, no?) but if you just take the bare bones - keeping a rhythm to the day, rather than a schedule that MUST BE OBEYED, it makes life easier.

Hope your sister's pregnancy goes well - lucky her to have you around.

I'm the same as jelliebaby - DS seemed to fall naturally into the EAS routine, and as a first-timer it was a huge help to me to be able to think through what he would need next.

Having said that, I did think the feeding advice sounded like dismissive sh*te and went to my bf support group instead. So really I only used her for structure, not feeding details.