bf at 8 months...I need a bit of advice.

[Mung]

When I started bf this time round my intention was to do the 6 months and then move to formula. I never found it easy with DS and the first couple of months with DD weren't that great. However, here I am at 8 months still going. I had even started to hope that I would carry on for at least a year. The only problem is that I am starting to get a bit fed up with it all for various reasons. My main thing is that during the (numerous) night feeds DD is starting to bite me and its driving me insane. The lack of a proper night sleep is another factor and I know formula wont make DD sleep, but at least I could go and sleep elsewhere whilst DH deals with her.

Anyway, the decision to stop is still not an easy one. I am getting all the feelings of guilt that the reasons for stopping are totally selfish and that if I were to persevere a little longer I'd manage to avoid formula altogether.

I also know that bf is so convenient and having DS who is only 2.2, I find I am so disorganised. The extra work of bottles does not appeal at all.

So, I was just hoping for some advice, tips, stories to help me make my decision.

Biting can be dealt with by saying 'No!!' very firmly and taking her off.

At 8 mths she can go for a good few hours without a feed. i was back at work f/t by this stage and my baby only had water or juice in the day. At other times,she fed when i was there and didn't when I wasn't but we carried on for 30 mths.

Expressing is handy too.

Some points to think about.

does she need so many night feeds? I tried not to feed dd1 between midnight and 6am from about this age. She adapted very quickly. It depends on your baby.

From reading your post it seems to me that rather than giving up bf'ing, you need to address the numerous night feeds and the biting. I'm guessing if neither of these things were happening you would be happy to carry on?

If she only bites at night, maybe it's because she's feeling that horrible sensation of being tired and hungry and is biting out of frustration, because she would probably rather be asleep but a rumbling tum is waking her up.

Does she eat much food in the day? Have you tried cramming lots of milk feeds into the 2nd part of the day and until bedtime? And/or a 10.30pm dreamfeed?

Thanks moondog. I do a very firm 'no' and move her away, she still does it about 4 times before realising. It brings tears to my eyes.

I was expressing, but I find it hard to fit in with DS always needing attention.

DH suggested just not feeding her at night. I just cannot tell if she really needs a feed or is just doing it for comfort.

I think you need to enlist DH's help if you're going to cut down the night feeds. Could you agree a stretch of time where he goes in to try and settle?

Also I did the squash into the boob for biting, seemed to work. Sympathies, biting is unpleasant...

I would keep my little finger at the side of dd1's mouth so that if she started trying to bite I could break the seal immediatly.

If she'll take milk from a bottle, DH could get up to her in the night for a bit, see if she'll settle without anything, and then offer her the milk/ you feed her if she really seems hungry.
DS went through a stage of biting when he was latched on, but not really hungry. I think that he woke up, I went to him, he thought 'ah hah, mummy= milk' and then found he wasn't actually hungry, and bit me because it wasn't what he wanted, but didn't know what it was that he did iyswim. With DH he didn't have that connection, and would settle with a bit of rocking unless he was genuinely hungry, in which case I fed him. In a few days it reduced night feeds to one without any trauma on any side (apart from DH having to get up ).

MaeWest...can you explain the 'squash into boob thing'?

DH is of the opinion that we should put ear plugs in and leave her to cry...thats why I haven't really enlisted his help. Perhaps I'll have a good chat to him and try and convince him that it is about time he had a go at broken sleep (he NEVER wakes up with her noise ).

So, perhaps I should be posting on the 'sleep' thread then...

is she teething? that would explain the biting and waking more often than usual at night? or has she been biting/waking a lot for ages? dd is 8 months. she can snack during the night sometimes but has just started sleeping for a long stretch (at last!) now I've moved her to her cot at night. get your dh to help out!! that's why my dd has started sleeping more at night - dh is very uninteresting for her, no milk on tap, so she settles back down again

She may be teething...grumpy, red cheeks, runny nose...but that has been for nearly 2 weeks and there are no bumps on her gums.

DH and I are going out for dinner, as it is my birthday today, so I can have a good chat to him about it.

"squash into boob" - basically instead of thrusting the little blighter from you (which let's face is what your instinct says), gently hug your baby in tighter so that the boob blocks their nose. The theory is that they will then have to open their mouth to breathe and you get your nip out of the way before they have chance to strike again.

I find the finger in the mouth sometimes worked, but if he was really determined he would just clamp on [ouch]. The good news is that for my DS the biting seemed to be just a brief phase, prob connected to teething, and has not done it since - he is now nearly 16 months.

Thanks MaeWest...she didn't do it last night and only (I say that through gritted teeth) woke up at 12.30 and 04.30. I am hopeful that we are over 'whatever it was' and I can start to feel more positive about bf again.

Glad things are improving a bit - hope you had a lovely night out last night, you deserve it