My baby doesn’t wake for feeds

[HelpreNCY]

My baby is nearly 8 weeks old. She had weight loss in the first week and had borderline weight gain since which has recently improved and she is following a centile. We are breastfeeding and then topping up.
She doesn’t wake up for feeds. I don’t know if it because she is too full from the top ups, but I’m too worried to reduce them in case her weight gain drops off again. Sometimes when I wake her up she definitely doesn’t want to feed and will just scream. How long is too long to leave her? Could there be something wrong?

When you say she doesn’t wake for feeds do you mean overnight? It wouldn’t be unusual for a baby at 8 weeks to start doing longer stretches overnight. My daughter at 8 weeks was sleeping 8 hours (it didn’t last long) and would just make up for it during the day.

During the day too. I’m sitting here now - she’s four hours since the start of the last feed and still fast asleep

Was she early or low birth weight?
Any symptoms or history of jaundice?
How often are you waking her?

She was a bit small at birth - 6lb - but not early. She’s not jaundiced.
I’ve been waking her 4 hourly but she sometimes won’t feed then.
After feeds she does have nice alert awake playing time - she doesn’t sleep all the time.
I think maybe the top ups are too big but I’m scared to cut them down because of her weight.

Four hours is ok when I was a baby back in 1960s babies were only fed every 4 hours when newborn and often doing 6 hours at night by 6-8 weeks, while I know it's not current thought it isn't actually harmful to go 4 hours unless tiny tiny like under 5-7lb.

Both my children were fed every 4 hours during the day and 6 hours during the night.

It's what I was taught to do some 30 years ago.

But she doesn’t wake at 4 hours - I have to get her and wake her up. I can keep doing this, it’s not a problem, but I’m worried that it’s not normal.

When my youngest was little I used to 'dream feed', feed while asleep but only because ds2 was premature and tiny. Took him a while to catch up and he rarely woke for night feeds. When he'd caught up in percentiles I left him to sleep. They'll wake if they're hungry.

Leave her to sleep, she'll wake when she's hungry.

I would love to, but her weight gain is only just ok. If she has fewer feeds in a day then I’m scared she’ll drop centiles again. It’s so difficult to know what to do.

With both my boys at first I gave them 2-3hrs between feeds during the day and 3-4hrs at night. Once they hit 10lbs in weight I relaxed that slightly (this took 11 weeks for my second).

You'll need to wake them up for a feed - stripping them off, tickling their feet, whatever it takes to get them to take a feed.

But she's screaming and crying when you wake her?

Babies need to sleep lots ime. At 8 weeks mine would easily go 4-5 hours without a feed (ds1 was sleeping 12 hrs a night at 12 weeks).

Have you spoken to your HV about your concerns?

Seems strange when most want sleep, but have you tried more regular wakening? I think the rough guide is 8 to 12 feeds in 24 hours, so every two to three hours. Dd1 was like this initially, made up for it by hourly wakening later. The weight loss was a real issue and we went onto a strict three hour feed routine. Until she was stable.

Could you start dropping the top ups gradually?
Both of mine had to be topped up and I started dropping them about six weeks. I started dropping the night ones first because I’m lazy and couldn’t be bothered to get up and make the special allergy formula.
An evening one would be good to drop because if they feed more in the evening your milk supply will increase. Feeding in the early hours is best for increasing supply but you’ll probably want to sleep as much as possible.

Give it a week if all is going well drop another. I’d got rid of all top ups by 12 weeks. Baby will wake more frequently

@SatsumaFan the HV just told me to give more formula

@brokengate If I wake her too soon then she absolutely refuses the breast, screaming and turning away.

@mayblossominapril I might try that. Did your babies have problems with weight gain initially too?

My daughter was like this - from birth would just sleep so had to strip her off, tickle etc, to get her to feed...as she gained weight I was advised to leave her longer between feeds but even at a couple of months old I would have to wake her! I sometimes found leaving her slightly longer was better as she was more hungry when she was woken, but I do remember the stress! She is now 6 and still prefers sleep over food!

They don't always wake when they're hungry . That's not good advice for a small baby who isn't gaining enough weight.

You just have to keep waking her up and feeding her as often as she'll take it. Are you getting any advice from your health visitor about it? That would seem the obvious person to ask for support,along with gp.

My first lost 13% but he had an artificially high birth weight due to being overdue, cs delivery and me having loads of fluids in labour. He regained very quickly on top ups
My second just lost weight due to constant vomiting and pooing. I did tell them it was Ann output issue. She took over 6 weeks to get back to her birthweight. I was extremely worried about her. She’s now a very chubby 8 month old with cmpa and soya allergy
The trouble is they put you on the feeding plan with top ups but never tell you how to stop the top ups.
If you want your baby to keep taking a bottle I would keep two top ups every 24 hours. I tried to keep one and it didn’t work and I ended up with a bottle refuser
Breast milk is digested quicker so they will be hungrier sooner. You May also see a reduction in poo nappies as much more is absorbed
Just go slowly

My second lost 15% of her birth weight

Sorry, ignore me, I'm tired and it's been a few years since mine were babies. Listen to everyone else. Hope you get some advice and support from your HV or GP if you're really worried, and that your little girl continues to gain weight steadily.