9 week old, dropping 1am feed...too soon?

[dal21]

Hi - DS is 9+4 and since 9 weeks I have dropped the 1am feed. He was still waking at 1am until I tried the BW wake to sleep - but now wakes at 2am. I dont let him cry at all - but sit with him give him a dummy and he drops back off to sleep. on one occasion didnt then wake til 5.30 but last night was up again by 3.30.
Soothing him and trying to make him go til 4/5 am without waking is my goal (he has dreamfeed at 10am and I am cluster feeding pre and post bathtime)....and right now it is hardwork. It would be quicker and easier to feed/ wind/ settle then it is doing what I am doing. oh and am bfeeding...

I am prepared to ride this out for a few more weeks if anyone can tell me that my hardwork will not be in vain.

Please share your experiences. thanks in advance

It would be quicker and easier to feed/ wind/ settle then it is doing what I am doing

Question answered IMO your baby is too young to go for long stretches without a feed, even if some babies do. He will go longer by himself when he is ready, honestly. Some babies take lomger than others. You are making your job harder at the moment - go with the flow and you will all be happier.

If he's waking then it's because he's hungry - and the only thing that will help him is to feed him.

He's ever so little to be trying to get him to go through the night without a feed - particularly as you're having to sit with him and soothe him anyway. You're right that it would be quicker and easier just to feed him - so why try that? In all probability he will drop the night feed soon enough anyway.

ME it's better to follow the baby's lead. It doesn't sound like he's quite ready yet.

Besdes, giving him the dummy may mean ghe thjen wakes looking for it, so you're now better off (worse, if anything!)

As long as you make nightimes boring, and the feed as brief as possible (and he takes as much as he wants, rather than comforting), he will gradually stretch that interval himself. Eventually you may find that he groans and whimpers, but doesn't wake - in which case you don't need to feed him. If he's ready he will sleep through, if not, he will probably wake again the following night.

thanks ladies. I know i sound as though i have answered my own question by saying that giving a feed is the way forward, you just get so much conflicting advice about taking babies lead vs. getting them into a routine. everything else I have implemented has left him a happier and more settled baby - wake up time, feeds, nap times, and bed/ bath routine has all fallen into place - and they all happened with my perseverance over the last few weeks. does nighttime feeding fall outside of this? if i have seen the results in those areas - will they eventually pay off here too?

I ultimately want to do what is best for bub longer term and now...and that is why I am struggling with what to do. you guys may be right, 9 weeks may be too soon, may make more sense to go with the flow for night feeds and try again when he is a little older (unless of course he does drop night feeds himself)

DAL21

DD2 is 9 +4 wks and hasn't fed twice in the night for weeks.

She has her last bottle between 6.30 and 7pm her next feed is when ever she wakes up anywhere between 2am and 3.30am. I have never done dreamfeeds but just go with what she waants.

i take my cue from DS. If he stirs or looks like waking I shush pat him. when he has stired or woken for the third time I give him a feed.

sometimes he seems to have woken because he has had a dream and waves his arms around. this wakes him up at times. if so then a SP and he is back to sleep.

he is only 7 weeks and 8lbs so the longest he has slept with this method is 5 hours. So i leave it up to him really.

I agree that routines are hugely helpful, but even they have to be implemented in a way that fits the baby. I struggled to get ds2 into a routine because the time at which he needed to, say, nap, was also the time at which ds1 and dd needed to be at school. There was no point my trying to implement a routine that would have him nap earlier or later, because it wouldn't fit his needs. Nighttimes also have routines, but, like all routines, they change over time, and you need to be receptive to your baby's needs and cues to decide when and how to change those routines. Rather than being receptive to 'the book', IYSWIM!

ok - I overwhelmingly hear that I should follow DS on this one. advice taken gratefully. thanks all!

dal21 - how is it going? my DS is 8 weeks, and was regularly sleeping after 10.30pm feed through to 5 or 6am. For past few nights she has been waking at 3.30 / 4, and also been unsettled during day. I have same dilemma as you, whether to feed her straight away or whether this will just encourage her to wake earlier. Last night she didn't settle even after feeding at 4am! Sush and pat dones't work with her - have resorted to dummy - which is causing other problems too....

I'm no expert at all (first baby) but my DD is 10 weeks old and has been bf on demand from day one and she has naturally fallen into quite a predictible pattern by herself. I've been writing down the times of her feeds from the start to keep track of any patterns. She dropped one night feed a few weeks ago and the last three nights she has "slept through" ie gone 6 or 7 hours between feeds. It might not last but I'm enjoying it while it does!

BTW she has been cluster feeding for a few weeks now, in the evenings. I suppose tanking herself up for longer spells at night. I haven't tried to implement any kind of routine at all, but she has found her own.

Maybe I'm lucky but DD is happy, settled and sleeps well at night.

Hi chipper - well i spoke to DH last night and he thought I should persevere for a while longer and not waste a weeks hard work. He has offered to take over the 2am shush pat now (well has insisted - I have met him halfway and agreed to alternate nights). Last night ryan woke at 1.4o but settled self, then woke at 2.20 - DH went to him and he settled within 20 mins (record!) then woke again about 3.45 so fed him.
I am sticking with it. the great news is that he isnt waking at 1 on the dot still and I am sure that eventually he will stop waking at all and go to 4 no probs.

Naturelover - I know, it is really hard to know whether he would have done this eventually himself - some babies are really good at dropping feeds themselves, but there are plenty who arent.

Chipper - could it be the 8 week growth spurt? erratic wakings are a sign of growth spurts according to the BW. The BW says to up feedings during the day and if you are on a 3 hour feeding routine, go back to feeding every 2 1/2 hrs for a few days, the milk intake during the day is increased and bub should settle back into the longer sleeping again. HTH.