Stopping breast feeding before you want to

[iamverytired]

I think I'm going to stop feeding soon. I have an appointment with the allergy clinic coming up and baby will be 6 months then. I don't want to stop but my diet is ridiculously restricted (nearly all top allergens cut as well as a lot of fruit and veg). I can't face this diet going into summer, not being able to enjoy food, being constantly hungry and aware my health is being affected (mentally and physically). We have struggled to identify what else is causing baby issues and I can't reintroduce and test foods due to constant reactions. I just end up cutting more and more (I'm not asking for advice on the allergy side of things and baby is not so affected/distressed that I feel I need to stop for his sake).
Problem is I just get upset thinking of stopping as I would love to carry on feeding my baby and I was just wondering how to deal with these feelings and how quickly I should aim to stop....I'm willing to keep going for another few weeks to make the transition to formula easier for us both but I don't want to prolong the upset for too long. What's best to do? And how do you manage the guilt when baby cries for you? 😟

My concern would more be what,if any, formula would suit a baby with unknown allergies. I suspect you might have a few reactions on transition. I assume you will wean baby onto food and offer water at 6 months anyway

I just want to say that as a breastfeeding mother of baby with cmpa, and also allergic to soya and eggs, Well done! I know what it's like cutting out these 3 food groups so i can't imagine cutting out others.

I don't have any advice really but it will probably be pretty tough getting baby to transition onto the bottle. You have done an amazing thing bf your baby for this time, hold onto that. Also your baby needs a healthy mum, that's the most important thing, everything else will follow. Good luck

We have prescribed formula by the way, I just haven't used it yet

Thanks @theworldhasgoneinsane, if it was just soya and dairy and egg I could manage but it's just so much....I trialled bananas the other day out of desperation and here we are 5 days later still unable to sleep and crying trying to poo. At least id got to a point he wasn't writhing all night before that. I just don't know how I could wean him and know what foods are ok when he still has awful green mucus poos from my breast milk! I am going to wait to see the paediatrician and then start transitioning over unless they come up with a miracle!

Have you had the latch/feeding assessed by a qualified lactation consultant?

My daughter had awful painful wind, couldn't lie down flat, very unsettled and crazy frothy green poop. Turns out she had a tongue tie (undiscovered until 9 weeks) and the way she was feeding meant that her tummy was full of so much air - causing all of the pain and the green poo.

A good point by the last poster. My gran always tells me that my dad actually had stomach issues that no one found until he was 5 months. Turns out he wasn’t allergic to anything, just having problems digesting everything.

I had a video call appointment with the infant feeding team - good old covid! So not assessed in person but I know doesn't have an anterior tongue tie. Not been assessed for posterior. I have wondered about excess air being the cause but there are just too many coincidences with foods - like before I cut out soy I had been to a cafe and had a soy latte and soy hot chocolate and that night he screamed and screamed and he's never normally like that. I thought it was the caffeine at the time. This post has been created after 2 nights of discomfort, crying and worsening of nappies after I trialled eating banana again out of desperation (even though his nappies were still green and mucousy). I had to hold him upright to sleep again and that hasn't happened in weeks now since I cut wheat and oats. I tried oats again after a week without and he developed eczema patches on his arms which have gone since stopping eating them.

Anyway this is turning into an allergy advice post, I am speaking to the GP/dietician/health visitor/paediatrician (soon) so I just really wanted some advice on switching to formula

Hey @iamverytired

I had to stop breastfeeding DC2 earlier than I wanted to. My reason was also due to allergies (slightly different as he would only take breast and refused any other food/fluid/formula so wasn't gaining weight).

To be honest I don't think you'll ever 100% get over those feelings but I would say stop while you're on a high note.

Also, depending on which formula you've been prescribed, a lot of babies take a while to get used to it so it's really helpful if you've got plenty of support.

Don't want to lecture you but to give further advice if you want it.

Sorry meant "happy to give you further advice if you want it"!

Also, if DC has allergies he'll probably have a restricted diet when weaning and his dietician may recommend formula to ensure all his nutritional needs are being met.

Have you been referred to a paeds dietician? I took the private route to make things quicker and like you I had cut out SO many things. In the end it was just good old CMPA but DS' gut had just become VERYYY sensitive following his vaccinations. In the end the only thing that helped was probiotics. He still isn't 100% back to normal but it stopped his mucous poos and constipation. Still gets a bit gassy at night but it is what it is.

I'm in a similar situation. I'm bfing a 7 month old that reacts to dairy, soya, eggs, coconut, tomato and red pepper through me and we aren't yet symptom free.
We had an awful week last week and on Friday she refused to breastfeed. We got some formula on prescription, we only gave her 1oz (it tastes foul so we started small) and we had the most horrendous night ever. We checked the ingredients and it has coconut oil in. We are struggling to find an alternative formula as they all seem to have coconut in.
I'm not ready to give up bfing yet but I would like to combifeed if possible as I need a break from bfing stress. I am 8kg lower than prepregnancy and am now underweight and I have severe pnd so it is all taking a serious toll on my well being. I'm not optimistic that I will find a formula that will be suitable given our allergies.

@Superscientist It's horrible isn't it. There's no easy answer. I have started to try giving my baby prescription formula to get him used to the taste but he won't drink it at all. I'd be surprised if he got 5mls in him. But then he started to become really fussy and crying feeding, and more disturbed at night. I didn't give any more for a few days as I think he started teething the next day so I couldn't work out why he was upset but could such a small amount cause him problems?? It's hydrolysed formula rather than amino acid but it's the one the dietician said to try so the GP didn't want to prescribe another yet. Just tried to give him some more but again he won't take it. It takes so long to pump anything to mix with it but that'll be the next step. I feel like my supply is lower, maybe that's why he's fussing. Probably the lack of calories 😔. I am just under my original pre pregnancy weight now. Just want to get him switched over so he is content but I fear like you the formulas will just upset him more. If only I knew exactly what caused him problems and could eat everything else I'd just continue breastfeeding but it's too much.

I feel for you I really do.
In trying to find out what else my lo is reacting to I've cut out the other nightshades (aubergine and potato) because of the tomato and red pepper reactions and other pulses/legumes because of the soya. I'm desperate to get to a baseline so I can test some of these. I was mostly vegetarian only eating meat or fish once a month or so but I have had to reintroduce more meat and fish so I have something to eat!

I don't know if this is allowed but I'm a member of a bfing cmpa group on Facebook, they might have advice for combifeeding and transitioning over to formula.

We are slowly weaning it's so stressful, we have a dietician appointment next month.

Good luck!

My son has CMPA. The prescription formula is horrible and it took a few goes to get him to drink any. You can add vanilla to it to make it taste nicer.

He ended up being combi fed. Is this an option for you? You can continue to breastfeed but give yourself a break to enjoy the foods you like.

My son always reacted to the formula, but it wasn't as bad as actual cows milk or normal formula.