Breastfeeding and overnight access for dad

[november90]

Does anyone know when a court would likely ask a mum to stop contact breast feed for a fathers over night access?
Pumping is not an option.
I've read online it's between 1.5-2 yrs. does anyone have any advise/experience around this?
Based in the UK. Baby under 1

I'm pretty sure it's usually around 18 months, so a while off yet. Had Dad applied for a Child Arrangements Order yet?

He hasn't. I just feel he is going to start with the threats again at age 1. He threatened to take the baby off me when I was pregnant. He's just absolutely vile.

He hasn't. I just feel he is going to start with the threats again at age 1. He threatened to take the baby off me when I was pregnant. He's just absolutely vile

Keep a record of any threatening messages in case you need to go for a non-molestation order.

Does he see the baby at all now?

@november90

He hasn't. I just feel he is going to start with the threats again at age 1. He threatened to take the baby off me when I was pregnant. He's just absolutely vile.

Keep evidence of any threats etc. Likewise emails etc. Record verbal comments dated. Usually it's between 18 and 24 months. However, increasingly, dad's specifically have been awarded earlier overnight contact, often though if they had been very involved with care of the child or older siblings. For example I know of a 3 yo and 9 month old with cao for eow contact. Plus he relocated and mother was expected to take the train and bus for a 2.5 hour journey one way to bring to him and he return them.

Oh my goodness that sounds horrendous and SO unfair. How was that decision ever reached?!
My ex has my eldest 2 nights a week so that probably won't help matters 😢

Ultimately, if things go to court there are no guarantees of outcome, so in many ways, its preferable to try and find a compromise that can be agreed on, even if not ideal.
If for example the child only has a morning and night bf,then one overnight probably won't impact your milk and if you pumped and baby takes a bottle, hopefully things would remain the same re bf. But I appreciate that this may not be as easy for you to get your head around.

No I understand what you're saying but my baby contact feeds during the night with 2 day feeds and it would take so much away from him to rush him out of his night feeds :(

How often does he have the baby now?

He has him for a 2.5 hours on one weekend day. I offered more access earlier on but he then changed his job which ment he was working week days and couldn't take him at an appropriate time during the week. Before he changed his job he had 3 week days and 1 weekend day off meaning he had lots of availability to see him.

Before he changed his job he had 3 week days and 1 weekend day off meaning he had lots of availability to see him.

And how often did he have him during that time?

Twice at his own discretion. This only happened for about a month.
The only time he's asked to see him more is when he threatened to take him away 3 nights a week at 3 months old.

If he only has 2.5 hours now, that's a long way off 24 hours!
I presume baby is now weaning, so really once weaned and at around 12 months, the breastfeeding argument becomes less valid, though I know mothers have argue the WHO advised bfing until 24 months.
He's need to be building up to include a meal time, then again build up to 8 hour days, including a nap time etc. And that seems quite a step away... Given he declined more time offers, which I hope you have in writing,in case he ever says differently.

Twice at his own discretion. This only happened for about a month.

The only time he's asked to see him more is when he threatened to take him away 3 nights a week at 3 months old.

As well as keeping his abusive messages, I'd keep a not of when he does have DS. Write as much as you can down.

If he did decide to go for a Child Arrangements, you can't predict what the Judge would decide, but if you get legal advice, can show that he's never been very involved and has been abusive towards you, it's less likely to go in his favour.

I'd also keep any messages you send to him so that you can show DS in the future that you've never stopped his DF seeing him, you were just worried about him going overnight at such a young age