Breastfeeding ruining relationship

[Sheera1]

So my relationship has been rocky for a while. My partner struggles to give me what I need emotionally and generally get intimacy from him when we have sex. At other times it is very lacking.

Since becoming pregnant we managed to keep up some frequency of sex and intimacy but it has totally gone since giving birth. He told me last night that me breastfeeding has desexualized me to him and so basically we won't be intimate while I am breastfeeding. I plan to breastfeed for a year at least.

So I am now in a sexless relationship where I get no support emotionally as he is just stunted or something that way. I tell him all the time but he just can't keep it up for any length of time. I am done giving him constant emotional support and getting nothing back.

Anyone else had this issue and what did you do? I am thinking we have a trial separation and that way I can't get hurt expecting anything from him and he doesn't get to take me for granted anymore.😥

It isn't just about lack of sex (although I expect that in a relationship even after a child), it is the fact that I only get emotional intimacy from him during sex and as that is now off the table, why am I still in this relationship?

This relationship is already over. End it and look forward to a happier future.

I'm not sure why you're sticking around either. It sounds as if he has some serious issues regarding intimacy and sex.

Nope sorry. Absolutely will not be able to stand that mentality that breastfeeding is desexualising. Communication is key in any relationship - if you have spoken to him at length and frankly about this, to no avail, then I don't see how you can continue to move forward in this relationship.

So sorry...

What an absolute bellend he is.

This sounds awful OP I’m so sorry he’s been so disrespectful and such an utter weirdo with respect to you breastfeeding.

Breastfeeding isn’t what’s ruined your relationship thought so please don’t make a negative association with that. What’s ruining your relationship is HIM, nothing to do with you or your baby.

When was your baby born? It is REALLY tough in the early days with sleep deprivation and it can test the strongest of relationships, but when you’re getting used to feeding you really don’t need so much negativity from someone who’s supposed to be on your side.

I do agree that communication is really important and although it’s hard having a really frank conversation might be what you both need.

Really hope you get more support soon. Have you managed to join any sort of breastfeeding group (albeit virtually) or have friends and family who you can lean on currently?

There is no future with a man child like that, just double the caring responsibilities which leads to exhaustion and resentment.

I've read some bad stuff on here op but this is one of the worst

I'm guessing his misogyny has other negative affects on your life?

have one of my only ever LTB

Please tell me you are financially independent???

Oh no, no no, please look after yourself in the coming months.

You and the baby deserve much much better.