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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

I think we are ready to stop ...

17 replies

Ghosty · 25/10/2004 22:36

My DD is nearly 9 months
About a month ago she started biting me. She would open her mouth as if to latch on and then very deliberately bite down on my nipple and pull off to see what my reaction was. I have persevered with the firm "No!" and taking her off and sitting her next to me for a few minutes and then trying again. There have been many feeds in the last few weeks that have been abandoned.
Anyway, last week she got her first tooth and now she is doing it and it is like a shard of glass being raked along my nipple (OUCH!!). This morning I told her "No biting!!" really firmly (with cross face) and put her down. She did it again 10 minutes later so I abandoned the feed. She cried like I had told her I had cancelled Christmas! I ended up giving her 100mls of formula (she takes a bottle a couple times a week and had bottles this weekend when I went away) which she downed in no time and then was happy.
Part of me is ready to stop and part of me isn't (if I was planning to have more children I wouldn't worry about it as I would have another 'go' with the next bub). But she isn't getting the message about the biting and since I came home from my weekend away she has been a bit pissed off with feeds.
Anyway ... I am rambling ...
Shall I give up? How do I stop her biting? I am dead chuffed that we have got to 9 months .... I didn't believe that we would make it this far at all so I think I have done well ...
Thanks for listening
G xx

OP posts:

pixiefish · 25/10/2004 22:41

My dd's nearly 9 months and bit me today for the first time. She's been pinching me for a few days now as she thinks it's funny- she laughs when she does it, but then again she thinks hair pulling is really funny. I just stop the feed and put her down- she only seems to pinch when she doesn't really want the feed. It was the same with the bite today (she's had 2 teeth for 3 weeks now)
If you feel the time is right to stop then do and don't feel guilty- you've done extremely well.
You could just assume that when she bites she wants to play and take her off but don't give her formula- she's not being deprived of milk then- maybe if she's thirsty offer her some water.
I'm also loathe to stop ghosty and know where you're coming from...

GeorginaA · 25/10/2004 22:42

Ghosty (although I'm sure some proper "qualified" people will be along to give better ideas in how to stop the biting) - are there some feeds that are generally more relaxed and less likely to bite?

I know my ds2 is much younger (5 months) but is really fidgetty during all feeds except the last night feed (6.30pm ish). Perhaps, if your dd is similar you could go for mixed feeding for a while? Do the feeds you enjoy doing for the closeness/benefits of bf for both of you, and switch to bottles for the "I need food quickly now with minimum fuss, mummy!"

You really have done FANTASTICALLY well getting to 9 months - you should be very proud of yourself (sorry, that sounds patronising, it really isn't meant to be).

My ds1 gave up on his own at 8 months, and although it worked out for the best for both of us, at the time I was devastated - was completely unprepared for how upset I would be considering how much of a struggle breastfeeding was at the start. I think if he had "allowed" me to keep one feed for a few more months, it would have given me the chance to come to terms with it more quickly. Does that make any sense?

prufrock · 25/10/2004 22:45

Ghosty - haven't tried this myself but remember reading it on here a while ago - when she bites try pushing her face into your breast. I think it slightly suffocates them (oh dear, sounds v. cruel doesn't it) and forces them to let go.

pixiefish · 25/10/2004 22:46

someone on mn said to shout out in shock and take her off- the shock's shock her into stopping (sorry for all the shocks- massive alliteration there)

hercules · 25/10/2004 23:03

I've tried all the various ways and nothing has worked for us apart from dd forgetting and only doing it every few days or so. I offer her cows milk or just leave off feeding until I can face it again.

Fran1 · 25/10/2004 23:05

Hi, i'm still bfeeding my dd at 21 mths have been attempting to give up since a year!!

So my advice to you is give up now whilst you can!

But the biting stops, i think they're just testing out what happens if i do this. My dd's teeth starting coming at 4mths, i think the biting happened at around 8mths in the same way you described and went on for a few weeks. I tried to say no and take her off the breast, but other times i would just yell out with the shock of it which she found funny. But after a few weeks she got bored of doing it and has never biten me since - and the teeth don't hurt.

So basically if you want to carry on bf for longer, don't let the biting put you off. But take into consideration the older she gets the harder it is to wean of breast.

HTH

AussieSim · 26/10/2004 01:50

My natural reaction to being bitten scared my DS so much that he only did it once or twice. I squeeled high loud and long! I went on to breastfeed until 16mo. Don't be discouraged if you do decide to give up. Only 20% of mums in Australia BF past 6mths.

LIZS · 26/10/2004 07:43

Ghosty

Fristly you have done really well to get so far. dd did the same at that age and my reaction was so violent that she never really seemd to enjoyed bf after that. She started to take in less and less and by 13 months had weaned herself although her milk intake remained low. If you can, and of course want to, keep one feed going so at least you can still experience the closeness, perhaps whichever one she is less hungry and more relaxed. You have to be firm when she does bite - remove her and calmly put her down, on the floor or at least away from you - then she may start to understand that biting means no more.

Good luck with whatever you choose to do.

Original poster

Ghosty · 26/10/2004 07:59

Thanks for your replies everyone! I think we will knock it on the head now though ...
Today went like this ...
am feed ... unsettled, biting, bobbing on and off, reaching up and scratching my face ... gave up and she downed 100mls of formula ... happy baby
Post-nap feed ... fed happily for 5 minutes, then started biting and scratching my face ... Gave up and didn't give her anything else.
Bed time feed ... unsettled from the start ... biting, scratching my face again ... tried the 'shock' thing but that only pissed off DH who said I was being mean ... tried again a couple of times and then gave up and she glugged down 200mls formula like she had never had a meal in her life (little minx!)
Oh well, I will try again tomorrow but I really think it is over now ...

Now I have to make sure I don't do something silly like get pregnant on the rebound!!!!!!

OP posts:

Pidge · 26/10/2004 09:10

Ghosty - brilliant effort getting to 9 months. What you do now is really your call and depends how you feel about continuing feeding. The biting will go - they go through a phase of doing this, and you're doing all the right things just saying "no" and then stopping the feed.

But equally if you're feeling ready to drop feeding, this is often an easy age to do it at - particularly if they're getting distracted and messing about!

Fran1 - I fed my daughter till she was 2 and was happy to do that, but I can appreciate that it's not much fun if you want to stop. I wanted to wind down the evening feeds, so moved to giving her a feed downstairs rather than snuggled up in her pyjamas in her bedroom, and she rapidly lost interest, preferring instead to play with her toys or chat to daddy! The morning feed was the last to go with us, she just gradually lost interest in it. Hope some of that helps.

mears · 26/10/2004 09:47

Well Ghosty - who would have believed you would still be breastfeeding at 9 months? Well done.

As far as the biting goes, it is a well recognised phase that usually passes. You might remember though that my youngest stopped feeding at 15 months when I shouted at her when she unexpectedly bit (having done the earlier biting phase). She got such a fright she refused to feed again. I was upset because I wanted to continue for longer, expecially as she was the last, but it wasn't to be and I did get over it.

If you want to continue for longer then do what you are doing and stop the feed but do not give formula. You could also just reduce the times you are offering - try only twice a day even. I personally would not give formula at any time at this age with 2 feeds because she probably gets enough dairy in other foods. I would give water/juice to drink. If after a 5 min feed you see her starting to fuss just take her off. She probably will have got enough milk anyway.

If however, you don't want to do all that, then continue as you. You have done brilliantly

louloubelle · 26/10/2004 14:54

Sorry to jump on this thread, but can I ask why you wouldn't give formula? My baby is 10 months, is down to 1 breastfeed a day at night, and I have replaced the morning and afternoon feed with formula over the last 2 weeks. I was trying to avoid formula, but was consistently told that cows milk was not iron rich enough (although she has a lot of milk puddings and dairy products). Any thoughts? Thanks

mears · 26/10/2004 16:58

louloubelle - I never gave formula to any of my children and the earliest I stopped breastfeeding was 10months. Drinking milk is not the only way to get milk - my children all ate yogurts, cheese, milk puddings etc. When they needed a drink they got juice or water. Cow's milk is over-rated IMO. It would have stuck in my throat to start formula at 10 months. TBH, if you really wanted to give milk, I would just give cow's milk rather than start making up formula. You would be amazed at how much milk your little one is probably getting during that one breastfeed.

Flum · 18/11/2004 15:13

I'm sure this thread is long over, but I am in similar position, just thinking of stopping feeding 9 month old but worried she will have no milk. She doesn't drink formula - Offer it to her loads she usually has 1oz then cries.

She eats like a horse though but you worry coz you hear all the time they need 14 pints of milk a day or something! (exageration of course)

marsup · 20/11/2004 22:10

I'm going to try to ressurect this old thread; similar problem. DS is nearly 11 months and we are down to two BF a day - morning and evening. I really love these moments of quiet, and they used to be very cuddly and relaxing for both of us. BUt now DS often won't suck properly - plays around at poking his daddy who is trying to sleep in bed next to me in the mornings (I take him to our bed for first BF) and often too tired or biting at night. Should I try to persevere? I suspect with only 2 b/feeds a day the health benefits are minimal and it is just for me emotionally...feel a bit selfish about trying to insist when time is maybe up...but is it?

mears · 21/11/2004 23:22

I would still keep offering if you are unsure about stopping. You will know for definate when they want to stop though. Mine just point blank refused to evn go on.

marsup · 22/11/2004 21:46

Now I have to stop Mears; you are right, it is pretty clear when it isn't going to work anymore. He laughs at me in the evening and cries in the morning when he is hungry. I gave him a bottle tonight and he was so pleased he finished it all. I feel very sad but it is for me now, not for him, so very selfish really...

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