6week old baby refusing to eat

[Missworry92]

My little had trouble feeding from the breast from the start so even when I stayed in the hospital they told me to pump and feed him expressed milk from the bottle. He had a suspected tongue tie too. I have been feeding him from the breast a little, he latches on for 2-3mins each side and then just screams and won't go anywhere near the breast so I finish the feeding with the bottle (expressed milk). He has been feeding like this for 6weeks and it was all fine. Today, I gave him a bath at 7pm and then fed him and he had a nap, completely normal. He then woke up at 10ish and I started to feed him, 2mins on the breast and then bottle. This evening he had about 1oz of milk from the bottle and then started refusing and crying hysterically to the point he just turns bright red and very difficult to calm him down. He won't eat anymore and just screams. I've managed to calm him down in my arms by swinging slightly but as soon as I stop or put him in his moses basket he goes back to hysterical crying. How can I get him to eat and sleep? HELP PLEASE 😭

He may have trapped wind or a belly ache. Leave the bottle for a while and try again in an hour or two I’m sure he will be fine bless you

I agree he just have trappped wind or reflux.

Btw my boy only ever fed for 5 mins every single feed.not all babies feed for 20 or more mins x

Try burping.

Try the tiger in the tree hold where they basically lay across your arm with their head at your wrist. Maybe Google it. My boy loved that, it always calmed him

How are his nappies?

My DS got wind a lot with his tongue tie when I fed him expressed milk in a bottle so I changed the teat to a slow flow one that was more like the breast - Medela have a good one. I was also advised to ‘feed the breast like a sandwich’ and switch feed as he couldn’t latch on without it hurting a lot - that meant I physically pushed my areola where it needed to be in his mouth. After 2-3 mins I would switch to the other breast, then switch again until he had fed for 10mins each side.

@Horehound I've burped him as usual, not sure about reflux though. I will check that position and definitely try it out, thank you!

I forgot to mention that his tongue tie got snipped on 23rd December but unfortunately that has not improved breastfeeding.

@Sparkles715 his nappies seem fine, he had a few poos and a lot of wet nappies.

@GrumpyHoonMain he had his tongue tie released a few days ago but that hasn't improved anything. He latches for those few minutes and after that he refuses and won't even give it a go at all, tried sandwich feed but he still just pulls off 😔

Do you have large breasts? Mine are and they were absolutely full of milk so I also tried the reverse pressure technique. You basically create a v shape with your fingers with nipple in between and the press inwards for a minute and this sort of makes the flow of milk go backwards. This will make your breast Kuch more squishy and easier to latch on to.

I also have the medals tears as someone upthread mentions. I could post one to you for you to try.

But seriously don't sweat the feeding too much...he will be getting a fair amount even just feeding for a few mins.
Hold him upright and see what's he's like after ten mins...is he better?

I'm just thinking of all the stuff we tried.

Infacol worked a treat for us actually

@Horehound my breasts are small so I don't know if I could do that. It seems that he eats for those few minutes as the milk just leaks out my breasts and he doesn't have to do much work but as soon as that goes and he has to suck more then he struggles. That's what it seems like but I might be completely wrong. The feeding specialist just said to put him to breast as much as I can so I keep trying.
I'm not sure about medals tears but I'm willing to try anything!
He actually managed to fall asleep in my hands and I've successfully transferred him to his moses basket, hopefully he will sleep for two hours or so. And from now on I have to make sure I get some infacol just in case this happens again.
Thank you so much for the advise!

Aw sorry I meant medala teats! So I can send you one just pm me your address :)

That's great you've got him down. Honestly the first three months I'd say are HARD. Then 3-6 are still hard but not so bad then I found 6 months onwards to be much better. O really feel for you.

But really I'd just go with what your baby wants, if he doesn't seem to want more milk well, maybe he isn't hungry. Speak to your HV again though just maybe so she can monitor it happening?

@Horehound thank you so much!
He actually slept for almost 4hours which was fabulous! As a first time mum I really didn't expect it to be this hard, you sort of hear it from everyone but think to yourself surely it's not that hard haha... I imagine 3-6 months will have its own difficulties with teething etc. How many kids do you have? :)
I will definitely speak to the health visitor and I'm currently seeing a feeding specialist so will make sure to let her know too, found that very stressful.

My wee one is 3.5 weeks, only feeds for 5 mins on each breast and is gaining weight rapidly.
If the baby is gaining weight and doing plenty of pees and poos then I wouldn't worry about length of feed.
If you want to breastfeed then I'd ditch the bottles just for just now and keep putting him to the breast regularly.

I forgot to mention that his tongue tie got snipped on 23rd December but unfortunately that has not improved breastfeeding

I would get the TT checked again, preferably by a Tongue Tie Practitioner. Is could be that another tie got missed.

In the time that he is feeding from you, have you tried Breast Conpressions?

@winterbabythistime I would love to leave the bottles but after those few minutes on the breasts he is still crying and if I give him a bottle he eats about another 3 or 4 oz.
@JingleJohnsJulie thanks! I have tried the compressions and sometimes they work and he stays on for another minute or so but not for a full feed I don't think.
Will definitely get it checked again.

I got the same advice you did with my 3rd. I'd fed my first two no problem.

3rd I shouldn't have pumped, DS got used to the speed of the bottle and wouldn't work at the breast, let go of latch and screamed for bottle. Pumping before bf was established can also cause over supply.

NHS has fuck all support. Find a breastfeeding group if you want to push on. They still have zoom meetings and Facebook groups, and they have experience of every problem. They were really supportive, even when I went to formula (hospital only loaned the pump for two weeks so I couldn't keep pumping)

@AldiIsla yes that seems to be my issue. I'm going to look for these groups whilst he still latches on even for a little bit. It's getting very frustrating and I've already had thoughts to stop trying to bf but I think I need to keep strong for now. Did you start formula after those two weeks?

I did. Might not be right for everyone but it was right for us.

The groups were amazing though, knowledgeable and supportive. Felt like the hospital just chucked a piece of kit I couldn't afford at me and gave me a two week deadline to fix it all.

Ask about paced feeding, see if it's something you could make work for you. Apparently it can help them deal with moving to slower breast feeds. If I'd had the pump longer I'd have tried it.

Good luck.
Whatever works for you is the right solution. I fed the others for ages. Sometimes it's not something we can control, sometimes there's a fix and it'll be great. You're doing so well already, I hope you can get some support and find your fix x

It takes about 4 weeks for a tongue tie fix to result in feeding improvements. In the meantime stick your tongue out at him as much as possible so he copies you. Move your tongue up and down too so he exercises his. You can also take your finger and press it at different points on his tongue to make it flex.

Have a Google for infant sucking exercises. My DS had TT and still took weeks to learn how to use his tongue properly. These exercises were so helpful, as were the infant feeding team I accessed through the hospital I gave birth and the HV team. I also found breastfeeding so much harder and more painful than I ever expected, but am so glad we managed to continue. And YY to FB groups, there's one run by Sarah Oakley who is a lactation consultant, and another called something like 'UK Breastfeeding support and advice' which is admin led so advice and support is very good.

Do you have an infant feeding team in your area?

My little one stopped feeding around 5-6 weeks. It seems to be connected to her reflux.. She will scream and arch her back away from the breast as if it was poison or something. I have success feeding her when she is half asleep (overnight or the end of a nap) and by doing lying down feeds.

@AldiIsla @GrumpyHoonMain @sausagerole @Superscientist
Thank you all for your advice! I've joined a few groups locally and am trying to get support that way. A feeding specialist will be seeing us on Tuesday. I have also ordered mams nipple shields to give them a go as the feeding specialist said it's worth a try as he loves the bottle so much more. Have any of you ever tried nipple shields? If so, how did you find it? Xx

Yes I used nipple shields and found them an absolute godsend when I was struggling with DS latch. They can cause other difficulties such as frustration for baby with slow milk flow, but if they work for you they're so helpful. Are you experiencing much pain? I remember the early days were horrible, feeling so useless as DS would fuss at the breast and be feeding constantly...it really does get better! As long as you're getting enough wet and dirty nappies is the main thing to keep an eye on.

How are you getting on? I'm sorry I haven't sent the medala teat yet but it is on my to do list!!

@Horehound hi lovely, we are not too bad thank you. I've started giving my little boy infacol and he seems more settled with is so great.
I think his tongue is getting stronger because when he does latch on for 5minutes it actually hurts more but im taking this as a good sign.
How are you yourself?
Not to worry about the teat, thank you.
I've ordered some nipple shields and hope that I will be able to trick my boy to feed from the breast that way.
Happy New Year to you all ladies xx

Also I recommend using a small amount of Lansinoh around the edge of the shield to help with stick, they can be shifty buggers!

Oh I'm so glad infacol is working. It worked wonders for my boy and I was so glad for it.
Be careful with the latch though because it shouldn't hurt. Have you tried laying down on your side and him feeding? See how that goes.

Yeh we are ok. We've actually had a few nights of him sleeping very well so I'm well rested for once! We never did any sleep training and even coslept for a while. He has been ill since sept (started nursery) and basically has been a terrible sleeper up until now. I guess his body has had a chance to mend itself he now can breathe easier and is sleeper so much better.