4 month old has never fed properly (FF)

[WankPuffins]

My Dd had just turned 4 months. I think I first posted about her here at 2 months.

Basically she has never upped her volume of formula since she was a newborn. Only takes around 18oz a day (bad day 15oz, amazing day 20oz

She was born on 9th centile but has been on 25th since 8 weeks so no one seems to care. But it's a constant struggle for me to get her to feed.

She's on gavscon since 8 weeks which has Stopped all the silent reflux symptoms and on Kendamil which really seems to help too. We have wet nappies and one poo a day (sometimes every other day).

Teats are not too slow.

Usual feeding schedule is this:

6:30am 2oz
8am 1oz
10am 2oz
12pm 1oz
3pm 3oz
5pm 2oz
7:15 1oz
8:15 2oz
9:15 2oz
2am 2oz

(18 oz)

Most of those feeds are when she's just dropped off for a nap. She doesn't show hunger cues, she's not bothered. Only time she seems to cry for a feed is when she wakes around 2am. Most of the time she will wake at 6:30 abs refuse that tiny feed and will take nothing until 10am, and then it's still only 2oz

I know some will say try going longer. Here's what happens when I do that:

6:30am 2oz
10:30am 2oz
2:30pm 3oz
6:30pm 3oz
8:30pm 2oz
2am 2oz

(16oz)

She's just not hungry. Anyone else had a baby like this? My other two were textbook babies.

Oh and those feedings take an hour or so. So it's never 2oz straight down unless she's just dropped off to sleep. If she's awake It's a constant struggle over an hour of her either laughing at me or biting the teat.

I've run out of steam today and haven't been cajoling. It's 11:30 am and so far she's taken 1 and a half ounces in total over 2 feeds.

No one is concerned as she's so far been gaining. I don't know how she has, but she has.

That sounds really difficult, but if she is gaining weight she is getting enough food. I'm sorry I don't have any advice but I remember that feeling well. My DS was the same. He got better once he was weaned but I feel for you.

Thank you.

It's just so frustrating when I keep being told is a phase! All I get is "they can do this at 8/10/12/16 weeks, it will get better" at what ever age I've asked. When I say she's been like this since 2 weeks old, I just get blank stares or they repeat "it's just a phase" or tell me to offer more milk like I'm stupid.

I had one doctor tell me to aim for 30 oz a day. Make 7oz bottles and she will drink them
They honestly thought I was making up 2oz and complaining that's all she took.
When I explained, they just kept saying "aim for 30oz". Pointless and made me feel like shit.

That’s really tough. Not sure I have any advice really.

Both of mine have reflux (and we’re given omeprazole). Both needed carobel thickener in their hypoallergenic formula to keep it down. DD is 15 weeks. She was similar to your DD until 3 weeks ago when I added carobel to her formula in increasing quantities. Before that she was slow to drink, crying at the bottle, choking etc. (definitely not laughing at me though!). Since then she has been feeding and sleeping great, she seems to be making up for the first few months of reduced feeds.

I know your DD is on gaviscon so not sure if her issue is different though and you can’t mix carobel and Gaviscon.

I agree though that if she’s gaining weight she’s getting enough food. DD was 2nd centile at birth, and had moved to the 25th by 12 weeks so clearly getting way less formula than recommended wasn’t an issue for her. Not everyone has the same calorie needs.

Weaning at 17 weeks massively helped my DS’s reflux so I’ll be doing the same in 2 weeks with DD.

Gaviscon really helped the symptoms. She no longer coughs and chokes at the bottle. I agreed with my dr not to try any harsher meds unless she started dropping centiles which she hasn't.

She was born 5lb 13oz and at 4 months exactly was 13lb 2oz. So doing well. God knows how on the dust she exists on. But it's exhausting feeding her.

Left to her own devises, not trying to feed over an hour or trying to feed when asleep she will take 10oz a day happily. But then dehydration would be an issue.

She's got no infest in food either. By this age, everytime I ate in front of my other two they would scream at me and be grabbing for it. This one doesn't care!

She sleeps well too. Asleep by 8:45, wakes once and as soon as I put the bottle in her mouth she's
Off to sleep again.

HVe you tried anti reflux formula? That made a huge difference to us you’ll need variflow teats though

Has baby been checked for a tongue tie?

Some countries like the Netherlands start solids at 17 weeks. Starting solids early can also reduce the risk of allergies. (See the eat study by kings college london). Have you considered starting solids soon?

@Matchsticklady tried them all! This one seems to suit her best. Anti reflux made her so constipated. The gaviscon seems to have sorted it. It wasn't that bad. My so. Had severe reflux, so this was ok in comparison.

@JustNotFunAnymore yes she has. Once at birth and then again at 6 weeks with our dr (we see a private GP, he specialises in paediatrics. He's not concerned though as she's gaining. It was his replacement when he was ill who was an arse about the 30z).

@pjani I'm not adverse to it. My eldest is 18 so it was 4 months back then. He was on solids at 15 weeks on medical advice as his reflux was so bad. He was interested in food though. Dd just isn't. I worry that if I do start filling her up on purées she will take even less milk. I know I can add formula to gluten free porridge.

We "play" with a soft spoon from time to time. He younger reflex to push it out is still strong if you know what I mean.

She has on occasion drank a while 5oz bottle over 20 mins. Probably about ten times in her life. So she can do it.

*her tongue reflex, sorry

My breastfed baby has been similar the last few months, when he would have weeks of just barely feeding ( just a few mins max)

What seems to help is feeding him when he’s sleepy. So his best feeds of the day are usually after his afternoon nap, I try and get him out his pram quickly and straight to feed before he wakes fully. Then at bedtime in darkened room, and overnight he takes 2 long feeds ( and often more short ones)

So, maybe something similar could help? Have bottle ready for as soon as he wakes in the morning or after naps. And try giving him another dream feed maybe around 10pm by gentling getting him up, feed and straight back to sleep.

@Caspianberg I've been feeding her mainly when she drops off for a nap. But it's hard, isn't it?

Especially as I've got two older ones. It so hard to drop everything the second she drops off to feed her. My other two were 7oz every 4 hours life clockwork. You could set your watch by them! Naively, I thought Dd would be the same!

The other two were bf for the first 4 weeks though and were starved as I produce next to no milk. As soon as I switched to FF, they guzzled like there was no tomorrow after being hungry for so long. Dh is sure that has something to do with it. I didn't even try to bf Dd after two bad experiences (no milk at all came in this time), so she's had food on tap from birth. I think there might be something in his theory.

She won't do a proper dream feed either. I have to get her at the right moment, just after she's dropped off. If I try to lift her at night to feed, her mouth is clamped shut. You can't even get the bottle in.

She's an awkward bugger, basically

Could you try after her nap if they are predictable? If she naps an hour usually, make a bottle, and try waking her after 50 mins to feed

For what it’s worth, ds seems to have grown fine despite on/ off feeding a few months.
I started basic weaning at 5 months. Now approaching 8 months he’s started taking both milk feeds and solid foods much better.

And on days now if short feeds, I just try and give him Greek yogurt each evening and he gets formula milky porridge each morning.

I will give that a go.

My 7 month old was exactly like that at around the same age. I know you said the teats are not to slow but I also thought hers was fine but tried the next size because I was losing my mind and it really helped. She was only drinking 2-3oz and as soon as I changed she started drinking 5-6oz!

She takes similar amounts to my current foster baby did at the same age, like your little girl he was maintaining his curve and not losing weight. I think some babies are just snackers.

Now at 8 months he is on 3 x 8oz bottles and 1 x 5-6oz bottle and no solids.

@Vicky1989x

My 7 month old was exactly like that at around the same age. I know you said the teats are not to slow but I also thought hers was fine but tried the next size because I was losing my mind and it really helped. She was only drinking 2-3oz and as soon as I changed she started drinking 5-6oz!

She on tommee tippee medium flow. The fast flow teats make her gag and cough when I've tried them.

I do have some variflow, I might give those a go?

@WankPuffins did you ever find the miracle cure?? Our 11 week old is exactly the same. It's exhausting and shes only gaining weight as I'm constantly feeding her trying to get ever Oz possible in her. How was weaning your baby that was like this?? Did you wean early??