guilty bottle feeder

[pattymc]

I'm not looking for sympathy, I stopped bf at 5 weeks and ds now 10 weeks and had a snuffly cold since I stopped, sometimes slight nose bleed too, I can't help blame myself for not continuing with the bf. Am I going to feel like this when ever ds gets ill and will he ever get rid of this cold? I would be so grateful for any advice

pattymc, motherhood is just one big guilt trip after another anyway even if you do BF. i should have immunised/i shouldn't have immunised/i shouldn't have gone back to work/i should have let him socialise more at nursery. you know what i mean. even BF kids get colds. mine just had a horrible fever recently and i was worried like hell. he's been BF all the way. if you need some light relief you could take this quiz to find out if you are a good or bad mum quiz
seriously, i don't mean to take your post lightly, but i'm sure you are doing a fab job at this mummy business. he will get better with all the love and care you give him. xx

I don't normal get involved in the bottle/breast debate, mainly because my dd is 12 now, so its nothing to do with me, but I couldn't help replying to you, since no-one else has yet!

I don't know all the rules these days, but I can't help thinking that you are beating yourself up! He may well have got a cold even if you carried on b/f. Its the time of year. I only b/f for about 5 weeks solid too and my dd has developed quite normally, with no terrible colds or illnesses and even if she did, I certainly wouldn't have blamed myself.

Sorry if its not the advise you wanted, but personally I feel that you felt that you could no longer or didn't want to b/f anymore, then you've done the right thing. Your son will be fine, regardless of whether his is still being b/f or not. As I said, Im not in 'the loop' for this anymore, but I was always told the first month is the most important and you've done that.

I'm sure I will now be shot down in flames by those who know the rules, but I hope I've helped you anyway.

You'd still manage to feel guilty even if you'd bf til he was 2

FWIW, DD was exclusively breastfed until 6 months old. She had a cold continuously from about 4 months on. For at least 10 months.

Maureen, there are no 'rules' in parenting, just choices.

And I wasn't aware that this was a bottle/breast debate...

No it isn't. I was just a little scared to say something like 'it doesn't matter' incase I upset anybody! I know how quickly threads can change!

pattymac, might he be intolerant to cows milk? Just wondering if he'd do better on a dairy-free formula?
OR, and I say this tentatively!! you might be able to relactate? It wouldn't be easy and you would probably need the help of a bfc but might be worth considering?

pattymc - Congratulations on your gorgeous wee baby regardless of how your baby is fed a mother's instinct it to be fiercely protective/nurturing/thinking about this and that 24-7 it goes with the territory.

i have all the anxious first timer tendencies...still do

don't overlook the wonderful things you also do.bottle feeding is no big deal, so don't let it become one

oh gosh it probably has nothing to do with you stopping bfeeding. Don't feel guilty please. It is really hard those first weeks but things really improve.
Use Vicks and a humidifier for the cold - they work wonders...

I feel guilty sometimes giving her a bottle just at night..... but then I consider the alternative (for me): feeling knackered all the time - can;t be good for baby.

Think about your reasons for taking up bottle feeding. Was it so that other people could feed him? So that you could rest/have body back/not get sore? Convience? Cos you're working? Cos I reckon if you stopped for any of these reasons your son is possibly beter off.....?

I know I feel I'm a better Mum cos I'm not as knackered during the day and because friends/family etc can give her the occasional bottle.

Message withdrawn

Pruners, snap! pattymc, ignore us both if you want! I only suggested it because the snotty nose seemed to coincide with the end of bf. My ds1 used to get a horrendous snotty nose if he drank cows milk but was fine with goats milk. He was over 2 though.