Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

how realistic do you think it is to ex bf till 6 months

58 replies

robinredbreast · 02/10/2007 21:36

dd is 14 weeks and has been ex bf so far.....

suppose my ideal dream is to keep that going till 6 months tbh
but im finding it quite demanding and am considering giving 1 bottle a day for a bit of a rest after dd has her last jabs in 2 weeks

just wondered on all of your views as to your views on ex bf to 6 months

OP posts:
Nightynight · 03/10/2007 12:12

it is a myth that everyone can carry on with more support and enouragement. I stopped because I felt so physically ill - and because I was totally occupied with feeding - no time to do anything else, they were so hungry. Natural, for 6 months? I dont think so.

NotADragonOfSoup · 03/10/2007 12:13

I managed it this time with BabyDragon and it was really easy. But she's my third child and I've breastfed 3 before so I was confident in my ability and somewhat blasé about breastfeeding... It was easier than weaning her and I still look back fondly on the exclusively-breastfed days now she's 20 months.

I'm not sure how giving one bottle a day would make it a rest for you though unless someone else is doing all the preparation and feeding.

Piffle · 03/10/2007 12:15

would like to say I loved bf though and found it a doddle all 3 times
Lucky I know

if you are not enjoying it then it is ok to look at other options

snowleopard · 03/10/2007 12:15

Exactly Habbibu - one bottle of formula (or ebm) a day and the rest bf, if that's what it takes to be able to manage, is a lot better than no bf at all. You shouldn't be cast out of the bf club for considering mix feeding for what may be very good reasons.

The animal argument is a red herring spidermama! I hope you don't carry your children in an "artefact"? Or make them wear clothes? Or eat with cutlery? We're not animals, we can sterilise bottle if need be, and sometimes there is a need.

NotADragonOfSoup · 03/10/2007 12:18

I do think you have to be realistic when looking at this. Our society isn't set up like an animal group. Very few animals (if any?) are looking after X older children, running a household with the cooking/cleaning that involves (ie not just hunting/foraging) etc etc etc.

If we were just expected to sit about feeding our babies with the support of a "herd" or "pack", breastfeeding probably would be a doddle for everyone.

NotADragonOfSoup · 03/10/2007 12:19

(Anyway, mixed feeding is a pretty good compromise IMO if you genuinely think it will give you a rest and allow you to bf longer)

Lorayn · 03/10/2007 12:22

robinredbreast, maybe you could compromise and express some milk so you can get someone else to give her a bottle, although if you want to keep bf'ing then it might help you to give this bottle at different times, and not regularly iyswim. If you do it shouldn't affect your milk supply and you can choose when you wish to breastfeed, you may decide some days that yo want to do al the feeds yourself, yet other days hand her over to someone else.

I think the main thing you should take from this thread is that while yes for many people it is possible, it isn't a crime if you decide to alternate.

Original poster
robinredbreast · 03/10/2007 12:43

well i find it tiring in that dd still feeds v frequently at 14 weeks
i have expressed alot of times but only get 2oz on ave which is def not enough
dd still has to be bf after
feel like i have a low milk supply and dd doesnt get a lot at once thats why she needs to feed frequently

also a tad worried dh might think im slacking in the housework dept

but im not miserable bf just find it incredably time consuming
i know what you are going to say about washing and steralising bottles
but on th times i have givn dd several lots of expressed milk
i find it lots and lots easier

feel really happy to have made it this far and will def continue till 4 months

just wish i had loads and loads of milk then it would be easy for me to

OP posts:
Lorayn · 03/10/2007 12:59

Being stressed can affect your milk supply. The hosuework can wait!

I don't know what to suggest to help dd get more milk per feed (maybe this would help you), but I would suggest if you are going to try expressing, firstly what pump do you use?? When i expressed one pump wouldnt get anything, yet when i changed I was like a fountain!! It can just be getting the right tools for your body.

Also the more you feed/express the more milk you will make. Could you set aside a day or two where you express immediately after a feed and try coaxing more out?? If you are finding it hard, the best thing probably is to try and work out how to get a good supply of ebm, rather than panicing about using bottles!

If it still doesnt work, then go to the formula, it isn't poison and will feed your baby adequately.

jellybelly25 · 03/10/2007 13:01

robin, i started to give one bottle of formula each night at 4mo, i was at my wits end for various reasons all of which the excl bf club will think are bollocks and/or easily sorted with expressing milk, but tbh i just wanted to be able to be off duty sometimes without having to also fit expressing in advance into a hectic life (yes i know i only have one other and lots of ppl excl bf when they have loads of kids but i find it very difficult).

i have found that it has helped in all of those respects but i do feel a bit guilty, regretful, envious and sad that i couldn't just carry on a bit longer and wear the excl bf badge with smug pride HOWEVER, I still have a lovely bf relationship with my baby for all of the rest of the day. and sterilising one bottle a day is not that much hassle really you can stick it in a saucepan for ten mins if necessary.

Original poster
robinredbreast · 03/10/2007 13:43

in a way the fact that it has been difficult for me has given me a great sense of achievment that i dont think id feel if it had of been "so easy" for me
iykwim
as if i had of found it so easy ,i would of just got on with it and not really thought that much about it

but it has been a bit of a struggle and i know ive only got this far with preserverance and determination

and sometimes i wonder if by reading mn and posting on here you only get a snippett of peoples experiences mainly pro bf
but then again in rl every1 i know is ff

OP posts:
jellybelly25 · 03/10/2007 13:52

wise words robin i agree.

LoRayningNewtsAndFrogs · 03/10/2007 13:55

Robin, I agree MN does seem very pr-bf, but I have yet to see anyone berate somene for trying and not finding it perfect!!!
We are all parents and I'd like to think pro-bestforyouandyourbaby, than anything else.

tori32 · 03/10/2007 14:06

JiminyCricket The gut is not sterile! It is not sterile from the minute a baby can put fingers in its mouth which he/she has touched surrounding objects and people with, which IME is from around 3 mths and less. This lack of sterility is regardless of bf or ff!

ADragonIs4LifeNotJustHalloween · 03/10/2007 14:10

If you have a dishwasher, you do not need to sterilise bottles etc BTW. In fact,there is a long running thread here which says you don't needto sterilise full stop (called something like "in the opinion of microbiologists... thereis no need to sterilise")

It's not a sterile gut, don't they call it something else...? It's not sterile as in germ-free way but in a "prefectly balanced" kind of way.

tori32 · 03/10/2007 14:14

Sorry, back to the point robin. I think you have done fantastic to ex bf for 14wks and if you want a break but don't want to ff because it will be less than perfect for you, why don't you express for 1 feed per day to give your other half a chance to help?

Scoobi6 · 03/10/2007 14:15

Excl bf for 6 months was not realistic at all for me, I had to go back to work full days an hour from dd's nursery when she was 6 months old. Don't know how either of us would have coped if one day I was there excl bfing her and the next she was having formula and/or solids with me nowhere near in case it didn't work out!

My plan was to mix feed from 4 months but dd was refusing to take a bottle so I had to start spoonfeeding (non allergenic, before anyone shouts) purees and baby rice. She'd gone from sleeping 11 hours to waking every two, wolfed down anything I fed her and her sleep gradually improved. By the time she started nursery at 6 months old I knew she'd make it through the day without me - she was eating well and slowly accepting the bottle. She's 10 mo now, and happily ff daytime and bf morning and night.

I think you have to do what suits you and your baby, in your particular situation. Well done for bf so far

tori32 · 03/10/2007 14:17

All guts of whatever age have the appropriate comensal (or helpful) bacteria to assist with the normal breakdown of food/ milk. This means that the balance will change accordingly if the op decides to use some ff. Just as the comensal bacteria will increase with weaning to facilitate digestion of food.

FioFio · 03/10/2007 14:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Lulumama · 03/10/2007 14:20

virgin gut, i beleive!

Nightynight · 03/10/2007 14:23

snowleopard - that is a very good point about being cast out of the breast feeding club.
I have spent 4 of the last 10 years breastfeeding, but reading mumsnet, I am definitely on the outer fringes of the moral high ground

DavidTennantsMistress · 03/10/2007 14:25

tbh I couldn't do it - we had to wean DS early - at about 22 weeks (I think around then) anyhow he was having one bottle of expressed milk, and also one bottle of formula as well (mainly as he wasn't sleeping thru so I did the expressed bottle in the night so DH could feed him) and the formla was there for his afternoon bottle.

he had 2 boobs morning and night until 8 months and then just an evening boob at 9 months - stopped at 9.5 months.

tbh thou when he wanted a little extra I would feed him. at 9 monhts I was ready to stop - I wanted my body back if that makes sence. without MN thou I wouldn't have lasted the first 6 weeks was a v sad day when I stopped.

MaeWest · 03/10/2007 14:29

Things helped me make it to 6 months excl bf:

  • Not having to go back to work until DS was 11 months, when he was eating food and drinking from a cup happily
  • Expressing the odd bottle (only a handful of times really) so that I could go out in the evening
  • My best mate having a baby at the same time and also excl feeding when I felt a real oddity at my local baby groups as most were on bottles by 3 months
  • Support from MNers that had been through it
  • The fact that I didn't have much else to do all day (no other children) DH being really supportive and understanding and letting me catch up on sleep as much as poss (this was the major* thing for me as DS was crap sleeper and would often only settle with the boob)

Having said that, there were times that I really felt I'd had enough - around 3 months was one of those times. Particularly as people keep telling you that it all gets easier, routine yada etc.

robin - you will decide what's best for you and your baby, after all that's where you're the expert ;)

MaeWest · 03/10/2007 14:30

Oh, and meant to add, DS still has morning and bedtime bf at 14 months

DavidTennantsMistress · 03/10/2007 14:36

tbh go with what you feel is right.

am posting quick as DS is awake and shouting, but.

it's as catch 22 I knew I wasn't ready to stop early so stuck with it - I worried i'd regret stopping early - nothing to do wiht teh BF is better etc etc. and then by the time it settled down I wasn't wanting to stop at 6 months so carried on - it really does depend on what you feel is best for you and your baby.

forget what others around you are doing/saying, you are hte mum, you know your own body & baby best so go with that

fantastic job btw for BF for this long

(also think there's a fair amount of pro FF'ers on MN as well so trust your instincts I say)

Swipe left for the next trending thread