Going backwards! Struggling :-(

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Hi everyone - DD is 9 weeks old and we're losing the progress we made.

We had a difficult start - tongue tie snipped at 5 weeks - but finally her weight was creeping up, feeding was less painful and although getting her to latch properly has been difficult, I finally thought we were getting there.

Our routine was/is a bottle of expressed milk from DH at 10pm, then again at 2am, and breastfeeding for all other feeds. She's accepted nipple and bottle since birth with no problems.

In the last few days, feeding has become extremely difficult. She sometimes refuses the bottle, screaming until I step in and breastfeed her. I could handle this, except that she won't breastfeed for long - only a few minutes - and then of course because she hasn't had a decent feed, she needs another one within an hour. She weighs the same as she did a week ago, so she clearly isn't getting enough milk to gain weight as she should.

We make sure to burp her, and keep her upright for twenty minutes or so after feeds to help with wind, reflux etc. and she seems fine otherwise.

I'm exhausted, stressed and worried. Please help!

It's not usual for babies to show a preference for boob or bottle and it looks like she's going for the boob.

There are some things you can do though, so don't despair yet

If she's taking a short feed, try breast compressions to encourage her to drink more. If she's falling asleep on the breast, have a look at this on sleepy babies.

Can you tank her up in the day too? Maybe try offering a feed every two hours?

If she's not gained in a week. Are the scales calibrated? Was she weighed at the same time of day on the same scales? If you are concerned about her weight gain at all, have a read of How might I increase my baby's weight gain?

I'd also have a chat with a BFC on one of the BFing Helplines. You might want to talk about the tongue tie, the weight gain and the expressed bottles overnight. I'm not sure if you have been giving her any feeds in the early hours or expressing but if not, this might have an affect on your supply. The BFC will be able to discuss this with you more fully

Thank you for taking the time to respond, @JiltedJohnsJulie. Could they suddenly start developing a preference almost ten weeks in . . . ? She was perfectly happy with either breast or bottle until about four days ago, now she's fussing with both.

I've already been doing breast compressions, switch feeding and feeding her every couple of hours during the day as we've been trying to get her weight up; it's been hard work and I've have two private lactation consultants and one NHS support lady out! Scales are calibrated, she's weighed every other day at bathtime . . . this is why I'm a bit despairing, I feel like we're doing everything "right".

And as far as feeding/expressing goes, we haven't changed the routine - I express while she's having her bottle feeds and that gives me the expressed milk I need for the next night's bottles plus 5oz extra for the freezer.

Ugh. Maybe it's a bad patch, a growth spurt . . . I guess all I can do is keep going and reassess in a week's time.

Hi OP, just to say 9 weeks has been prime fussy time for both my sons when breastfeeding. I just kept switching sides, tried to feed them when sleepy as they tended to stay on longer and some rhythmic back patting while feeding weirdly helped ds2 calm down loads. With both 9 weeks was the time when I felt like giving up breastfeeding but they both sorted themselves out by 12 weeks. I hope you experience similar. Good luck!

Hi @KatnissK - thank you, I guess I should keep going then . . . we've worked so hard to get to this point, I'd hate to give up now.

I'm tempted to give up the expressed bottles she gets, as it would be easier to not have to pump/sterilise bottles etc., but I do want to keep her used to taking a bottle so it gives me a bit of freedom.

Arrrgh. Yeah. Power through . . .