Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Advice needed breastfeeding and sleeping through at 3 mths.

113 replies

tori32 · 22/08/2007 14:39

Does any one have a breastfed child who slept 7pm-7am from 3 mths? If you did then can you tell me how to achieve it? Thanks?

OP posts:
msappropriate · 22/08/2007 20:39

surely attention is a need? not a concrete one like thirst or not having a dirty nappy or being in pain. But a very real need none the less. Vital in fact.

Original poster
tori32 · 22/08/2007 20:39

Oh no silverfrog I agree about the late for nap thing. I was a bit obsessive for the first few months but I think that was PND rather than the book. After that I just used it to guide my routine not encase it in cement!!LOL

OP posts:
SuperMonkey · 22/08/2007 20:41

Silverfrog - it was the same for me, DS didn't go down before 10pm for about the first 8 weeks and cluster fed all evening. Strangely, as soon as I moved him into his cot he settled earlier.

JodieG1 · 22/08/2007 20:45

Can't quite believe some posts on this thread. 6 week old babies need lots of attention, food, hugs etc why have them if you don't want to hold and comfort them ffs? Just because they're not hungry doesn't mean they don't need something. 6 weeks old is so so so young, the world is a big and scary place, can you imagine only having seen this world for 6 weeks or 3 months or even a year? Everything is new and you don't know what will happen etc, not like us adults who have had years to get used to it all. I just think babies need a lot more than milk and that it continues at night whether that inconveniences the parents or not.

Original poster
tori32 · 22/08/2007 20:45

Yes I agree msappropriate that attention is a need, however, your sleep and babies sleep are as important because without adequate sleep the brain cannot restore itself and therefore function is impaired. If baby gets lots of attention all day then it should not be necessary to have it all night as well. Children trying to buy time by stalling at bed time, but its not healthy to have them up late and get up early in the morning. Setting a good circadian rythem is important for all children.

OP posts:
octoandflash · 22/08/2007 20:47

LOL tori Please could you come and tell my 3 x ds that!

SuperMonkey · 22/08/2007 20:48

DS gets all the attention he wants and some that he doesn't - he goes to bed a very contented and happy boy and knows I'll always come to him if he wants me. Just because he doesn't wake every hour during the night for food/attention it doesn't mean that he is being neglected.

Original poster
tori32 · 22/08/2007 20:51

Sorry Jodie but as far as I am concerned we were having a civilised discussion about breast feeding. This is not a to hug or not to hug debate! Also its your choice if you want to rock your child to sleep and pick up every 5 mins. I don't agree with it because as they get older they have come to rely on it. Therefore, the need then arises for serious controlled crying over many weeks rather than a few nights when he or she is small.(unless they sleep with you until high school that is).

OP posts:
msappropriate · 22/08/2007 20:51

not sure at 6 weeks they are buying time!

Just becasue babies who wake up and need a quick cuddle or a feed are going to bed too late or not getting enough sleep or up all night. There is quite a lot of middle ground.

Also have you read the research about the stress hormone cortisol? Not good for babies brains either.

FunkyGlassSlipper · 22/08/2007 20:52

Havent read the thread and hope there's no fighting as it seems to have lots of posts.

Anyway, OP.

DD1 slept at 10 weeks. Exclusively breastfed. 9pm - 9am

DD2 slept 11pm-5am at 12 weeks and by 20 weeks was 8pm until 8am.

Breastfed babies can sleep.

HTH

Original poster
tori32 · 22/08/2007 20:52

octoandflash we go back to the hugging to sleep etc again! LOL

OP posts:
Original poster
tori32 · 22/08/2007 20:56

funkyglassslipper no we aren't scrapping but had wobbled off the thread! Thanks for that ray of hope about bf babies sleeping through. Do you have a magic formula?
Supermonkey and silverfrog have been giving me some helpful hints but more always welcome!

OP posts:
JodieG1 · 22/08/2007 20:58

Tori mine have never needed hugging to sleep when they're older actually. I have dd 5 years, ds1 nearly 4 and ds2 7 months. Both my older two are well adjusted, happy and confident children. So your theory is wrong. We did co-sleep and bf and still co-sleep with ds2, nothing wrong with that. All their needs are met and not just during daylight hours, I'm an attachement parents like Dr Sears really and it works very well for us. I think when you stop worrying about how long they sleep for then it gets easier and just relax about it more. I don't cope well on little sleep but it comes with the territory when you have children imho.

JodieG1 · 22/08/2007 21:00

and I agree with you msappropriate about the stress hormones, I've read about that also and seen articles in the New Scientist regarding the same thing.

octoandflash · 22/08/2007 21:01

I think the more children you have the more flexible you need to be with your approach and the more open to suggestion you become!

Habbibu · 22/08/2007 21:01

I think it can get very complicated. My daughter fed to sleep (lazy mummy) and slept through well from really quite a young age. Many's the time we'd hear her wake up, sing, babble, play, maybe whinge a bit and settle herself back to sleep no problem, with not a jot of input from us. Then teething and a virus hit, sleep went bonkers, and we are very gradually weaning her off being helped back to sleep by us. It's slow, but is working. I think it's great if you can find something that works for you and your baby, but it may not necessarily work for different personalities.

Lizzzombie · 22/08/2007 21:03

My Lo started sleeping through from a really early age. Not till 7am but definately from 7/7.30ish till 6/6.30ish. Still does now too.
I think we were just lucky, but I was following the E.A.S.Y. routine and he sort of just fell into it like clockwork. (I'm touching wood as I am typing this)

emkana · 22/08/2007 21:06

It's a common misconception IME that you have to come down "hard" on your baby very early on or they'll never sleep on their own/never stop breastfeeding/never stop feeding to sleep etc

I did co-sleeping, feeding to sleep etc, and my dd's are now fantastic sleepers, never play up at bedtime, just great, and they've been like that for several years (they are now six and four). Children's natural instinct is to want to become independent, that's what they're programmed to become, and if you give them lots of security and listen to their cues they will separate from you when they are ready, not when it's imposed on them.

Original poster
tori32 · 22/08/2007 21:07

Jodie I respect your parenting views and am glad that the attachment parenting has worked well for you. For reasons I explained earlier in this thread I cannot co-sleep if I am to be happy with my child during the day. I need respite from my child at night. I do have very old fashioned views on parenting and believe that it served me well so why change or reinvent the wheel.

OP posts:
foxcub · 22/08/2007 21:16

Tori - my first two slept a 6 hr stretch at night from 10 weeks. However, my current baby is 24 weeks and still wakes once or twice for feeding. The main difference between them is that my current baby is very big and hungry all the time.

They will wake if they are hungry and I don't think you can get them to sleep through unless their tummies feel full up.

I've had a terrible time with this baby, who was waking me every 90minutes/2 hours at night for the last 4 weeks - its only stopped now I am giving him 3 pureed baby meals a day. Its transformed him. I'm not suggesting you should wean at 3 months but I suppose I'm just saying that in a couple of months, when you start to wean, your baby should start to sleep through and give you the night's sleep you need

Original poster
tori32 · 22/08/2007 21:16

I also think it is a matter of what works best for different personalities. I personally cannot stand disorganisation and instability. I find it unnerving. I also would like a life as well as having children. Call me selfish but ocassionally I like to have a few drinks. I couldn't ( or shouldn't) when co-sleeping incase I smother the baby. I also like to visit friends and would be mortified if it woke all their household several times per night. ( All my family and close friends live 5 hours away so its not like I could just pop in)

OP posts:
Original poster
tori32 · 22/08/2007 21:18

Thanks foxcub. How big was your lo?

OP posts:
SuperMonkey · 22/08/2007 21:18

My DS is very big too - above the 98th percentile line in height and weight.

SuperMonkey · 22/08/2007 21:19

But was born fairly average in weight - 7lb 15oz

FrayedKnot · 22/08/2007 21:20

Sorry Tori32 but I think you are searching for the Holy Grail.

DS fed every roughly two hours during the day until he started solids and woke 2-3 times a night for feeds too. he took as much as he could at every feed, because he was sick after every daytime feed until he was 8 months.

He self-weaned from night feeds at about 13 months.

I didn;t co-sleep properly, but had a bed in DS' room in which I often slept most of the night.

I found night feeds incredibly hard. I didn;t enjoy them. I felt lousy during the day. If I had my time over, I would have persisted with expressing & getting DS to take a bottle so that I could have had the occasional night off. Otehr than that I wouldn;t have done anything differently, except I would have relaxed about teh whole thing and stopped worrying about chasing that Holy Grail myslef, because for some babies, it just isn;t going to happen.

I think your expectations of a 3 month old sleeping 7-7 are unrealistically high. Sorry.

Swipe left for the next trending thread