ahh DS3 driving me potty - when he's not feeding every hour, he's screaming hysterically at the bottle.......

[TheQueenOfQuotes]

when I offer it to him. We seem to be developing a pattern - early morining BF - no problems. All morning hourly feeds (3-6oz depending on his mood) no problems (apart from fequency). Come afternoon (particualrly late afternoon/early evening) screams hysterically when offered the bottle, although does usually manage to take 2-3oz when gently coaxed to. Middle of the night (approx 2am) DH gives him a bottle - usually guzzles a good 5-6oz - no problems.

So why do I get this hysteria about the bottle in the afternoons - but not in the mornings???? And why does he feed so frequently in the mornings but a bit less afternoon/early evening??

Today has been really hot so I've ended up giving him one or 2 short BF's as I'm worried about the lack of liquid he's taken..

My DD is four, btw lol just in case you wondered why I mentioned that my DD can make sandwiches

How long does it take him to make a sandwich though, really? How long would you need to prepare stuff for dinner?

Or does he take Scooby snacks to work? [attempt to get QoQ to smile]

well he usually has boiled egg and/or sausages in his sandwiches (which need cooking obviously), plus he then makes a snack to eat before he goes, and as he's doing the "night shift" atm he doesn't get up until around 9.30-10am so he's also got breakfast to make and eat.

It would depend on what I was cooking for dinner on how long I needed to prepare.

He may as well take scooby snacks, he takes one of those boots cooler bags FULL with him to keep him going .

Of course he'll be home soon and I'll tell him how sh*t my day has been.....and he won't "get it" as DS3 is always fine when he's about

Just a few ideas :-

Great advice Hunkermunker btw !!

DD2 Was very ill between 3-5 weeks old an was in hospital she would never settle on her back so a nurse layed her on her side wrapped snugg in a blanked, and put a black and white picture in front of her, she used to nod off starring at it !!

When feeding dd2 i had a special box of toys that only came out at feeding time for dd1 to play with.

Have you tryed putting ds3 down in his pram?

Could he have colic ?

And finally and i am sorry if this sound harsh, but maybe he settles better for DH because he is not as stressed as you are, some babys are just to good at picking up on this !!

But most importanly i think you need some ME TIME, ASAP !!!

Good luck, and keep up the good work

He can boil an egg when he gets in from work and leave it, unpeeled, in the fridge over night.

He can cook sausages when he gets in from work and leave those in the fridge overnight.

He can make the sandwiches in the morning.

QoQ, there ARE ways round this, honestly, if preparing dinner in the morning is the thing that will help you have some time with the older two in the afternoons.

What can't you do with the bigger ones while DS3 is feeding? Can't you tailor your together time with them to fit what you CAN do?

I mean "peeled" btw.

During the day he sleeps in his carrycot (which is part of the pram but comes off IYKWIM) even DH can't get him to sleep in his cot during the day .

Don't think he has colic.....or if he does it's "weekday colic".

Perhaps you're right I'm getting myself too worked up about it, but as each bad day comes, and then goes I just get more stressed thinking about it.

ME time?? What's that - it's the summer holidays so all 3 DS's all day, everyday .

Does DH have any leave owed to him?

Even a day?

hm - our smoke alarm always goes off when frying things or cooking "fatty" things in the oven, and I just can't justify in my head him getting home from work at gone 9.30pm, eating his dinner, sorting his paperwork (for work) and then having to cook the stuff for his lunch the following day, plus then being up for 1-2hrs at some points betwee 1(ish) and 4am.

I can't take the DS's to the park (it's ok if I have actually mananged to get DS3 asleep in the carrycot but if he's awake I'm not much fun), or out in the garden to kick a ball around with them, or make the cakes and flapjack which I promised DS1 we'd make during the summer holidays.

Oh gawd I don't know, I just want him to settle in the afternoons like he does in the mornings. ATM this is nothing like I imagined it would be with the older DS's and baby .

Also If I do BF in the afternoon and evenings (which I have done once or twice) it tends to b*gger up his sleep at night as he spends the entire time feeding/sleeping latched on/feeding/ sleeping latched on etc etc so just isn't tired come the evening.

I think he's still got some left but not sure - why?

Lady - you cant do everything.

Somethings gotta give. Even if just for a few months. Why cant you go to the park?

When i said ME TIME even just a couple of hours to yourself at the weekend might do you good !!

even if its just a long soak in the bath with some nice bubble bath !! i know it may seem like just to much effort, but im sure it would be worth effort.

could any of your friends or family take ds3 out for a couple of hours so that you can spend some time with your other 2

VVV - because DS2 likes to follow his brother up the biggest climbing frame and needs "rescuing" lol.

TCD - no family close by and don't really have any friends that could take DS3 out, as my closest friends either work, or have young (boisterous) children of their own to take care of.

Anyhow, I'm back at the computer with a large glass of Vodka and Apple Juice and feeling a bit better now. Someone mentioned growth spurt earlier (not sure if it was this thread or one of my others) and seen as though he was 10 weeks old yesterday that's probably about right.

Up until the last few days when I've had a bad day with him I've been able to say to myself "it's not going to last", but I think I've got a touch of PMT (yes blasted AF is back......I'm not impressed DS2 was bottlefed exclusively from 5 days old and AF didn't return until he was about 6 months old!) too.

Thanks for all your comments (even if I did sound like I was trying to find reasons why most/all of them wouldn't work) I really do appreciate it. I think I'm going to do what Hunker (I think it was - too lazy to go back and re-read the whole thread) suggested and BF him "as and when" (when possible) during the day while also continuing to offer the bottle, I didn't the milk supply (despite it being very clever and all that) would be able to "cope" with that sort of thing but I guess as long as I express plenty on the days he'd not BF'ing so much I'll be ok.

Still feeling a bit that he settles so much with DH, but I guess some of that is just guess I was hoping that at least one of my DS's would be a "mummy's boy" but I seemed to have drawn the short straw (again). actually I love that DS1 and 2 are so close to DH as now they're a bit older it means I do get time to myself (and DS3...). I guess it's only a year or so before DH takes all 3 DS's off with him to give me a proper break .

Right off to try and find a cheerier thread to post on before I get myself upset again

Aww dont be too hard on yourself.

This parenting lark is hard! I dont believe anyone who says having 2 + children is a breeze....it really isnt.

You got any softplay places near you?

yes but I can't drive so it would involve a 45 minute (30 minutes on my own ) walk there, and another one back

QoQ, I have 3 boys, too and I have been where you are now. Really and truly he sounds colicky to me and maybe is less so at weekends because he can sense that everyone is more relaxed. Will he take a dummy? It was the only thing that would settle ds1 and ds2 ( ds3 was sent to try me and wouldn't take a dummy or a bottle or anything except my breast!) I hated it but it did help. Also colief saved my life with ds2! I put two drops on each breast and he was like a different child!
Why are you so stressed about having a tidy house? Does dh give you a hard time if the house is a mess? I mean, if you have a small baby, the house is supposed to be a mess, isn't it?

Well you are just going to have to move - or learn to drive

Enjoy you vodka QoQ, off to bed now nightall

the little b*gger - he woke up 20 minutes ago, DH still hadn't eaten his dinner so I had to sort him...downed 4oz in one go without so much as batting an eyelid.......

"Why are you so stressed about having a tidy house?"

I'm not a very tidy person at the best of times, so "tidy" for me is probably a tip for others. And I know from past experience that if I let the house get too bad it's a downward spiral and it affects me quite a bit, looking back at the times I've had depressions/PND I've been at my worst when the house is real mess. When I've got it looking "acceptable" (to me - DH would like it tidier so does bits and pieces when he's home - and he's learned not to say anything about it ) I'm much happier.

for those that supported me on this thread have a look here - my confidence in my abilities to look after him has been greatly restored

Good for you lady