Please help me - I don't understand this

[EdwardGorey]

DD2 is six weeks old tomorrow. Breastfeeding has been fine. She feeds well. She's putting on weight.

Out of nowhere, she just won't latch. She's absolutely fine and well in herself. Nothing had changed. Fed around 1am as usual. But then at 4am just wouldn't latch. She's trying to get on there, but it's like she's just putting her mouth on my nipple then moving her jaw but not actually sucking. It's the latching part she seems to have forgotten how to do.

We tried for an hour, then she got so cross and exhausted she fell asleep. She's back up now and still won't/can't. I don't understand this! She's frantically hungry. She's now frantically screaming at a bottle because she doesn't know how they work.

Breastfeeding helplines don't open till 9.30am. Does any one have any suggestions before then? This just doesn't make any sense.

She may have a sore ear, start of a cold? Was there any upset at last feed? You need to give her milk is some way expressed or formula. Try a shot glass or a small diameter cup and let her sip, a dropper if you have one.
Try getting her to latch in different positions- rugby hold, vertical, lying down, you on all fours, lying down inverted, switch rugby hold. Strip off, both you and baby, just a nappy, lots of skin contact. Try latching when she is sleepy. Try latching while you are walking/rocking.
Are you engorged? Any changes to diet or medication? Are your nipples OK?
Try taking her into a warm bath to feed, light off, the wet.warmth.skin contact may trigger the primary postnatal rooting reflex ( this method is sometimes called "rebirthing")
If no luck do call a helpline, many are open 24/7.

Could be ear infection or cold - no signs though. Last feed absolutely normal. Have managed to get her to take an ounce from the bottle but she's still very hungry. We've been sweating over each other all night so I'm not confident removing my few remaining clothes is suddenly going to help her.

I've tried every position I can manage. There have been no changes to my diet. I was getting engorged because it's been so long, but I've expressed and it's made no difference.

It's not a problem with not rooting - she's going for the boob, but just not sucking/latching once she's there.

Sorry if any of that sounded snippy. I appreciate the response. But she's frantic and I just can't work out why she's suddenly lapping uselessly at my nipple rather than attaching properly.

Don't panic. No need to apologise.
She will sense your distress.
You can feed with a teaspoon. Takes time but can be done.
Try expresssing a few drops when she is at your breast so she can taste the milk. Maintain eye contact, speak soothing words, stand and rock gently while she tries to latch.
Do try the bath if you have one. Or a change of scene. Sit outside, open a window.

If you can express some milk you can use the syringe from a bottle of calpol (I know your baby is too little for call now but if you buy a bottle now it will last till its needed no worries) to drip the milk in at the sides of her mouth (at the sides is best as then the swallow reflex gets triggered whereas squirting in the middle could get the milk breathed into the lungs)

The two of you have got into a feedback loop that means you are both too stressed to resolve this until she has a full tummy.

It will be OK. You are genetically and emotionally programmed to feel like your baby being hungry is an unbearable catastrophe which feels overwhelming. You will get through this and it will be OK.

It wouldn't be an over-reaction to go to hospital for help if you can't make progress. Six weeks is very very little and if she can't do the work herself to get what she needs then she will be getting dehydrated too.

Thank you. She's had another 2.5 ounces of expressed milk via bottle so a) she's not as starving and b) we can rule out any issues with milk itself.

She's calmed down a bit, so were just having a cuddle and going to try again in a bit. It just doesn't make any sense. It's like she's forgotten how to properly suck.

NCT helpline woman completely baffled. Agrees it doesn't make sense for a six week old to suddenly not be able to suck. Said to treat it like nursing strike (stay calm, keep trying, laid back position, etc) and express to keep supply up. She's going to post on a BF counsellor forum to see if anyone has come across similar. But she agreed it was kind of weird. Not really like a nursing strike, bit nothing else obvious.

We're doing okay with the bottle now, so the immediate panic is over - but I really don't want to lose breastfeeding. This is horrible.

Good to have an update. I hope you have had some more knowledgeable help during the day.

Nothing. Local lactation consultant on leave for two weeks. No one I've spoken to has a fucking clue. She is at least taking bottles, bit I'm worried about the consequences for our feeding if we don't fix this soon.

All I can say is persevere; it sounds small and futile I know but there's every reason to believe she will latch again. I had this once with my DS (now 15 weeks) and admittedly it o it lasted about 4 hours; I shoved my nipple in his mouth when he was asleep and he latched on. After that he was fine.

I'm sorry you've had such a tough day though, it really can't have been easy. Keep your chin up and let us know how it goes.

I also second 'dream feeding' wait until she's asleep and happy and fed (not immediately after a bottle) squeeze some milk out to lure her in and see if she will latch

Does she have a sore mouth maybe? Can you feel around for any swollen gums or spots?
My baby started teething by 6-8 weeks, but the first tooth didn’t erupt for weeks after that and he always refused to latch on.
It’s really hard when they won’t feed, but are starving and you’re becoming more engorged and more stressed which then just makes it all worse! Keep trying and I’m sure things will get better soon.

I wonder if shes teething, so the actual latch is painful? Can you get hold of some teething gel to try just before a feed? I know its frustrating to be told to just hang out together almost naked but it helps for so many things.

And I dont think this means the end of bf for you. Just keep offering and I'm sure she will be back to boob soon enough. Well done for keeping going

Thanks everyone. I think we've made a bit of progress. She's started clamping on - it's quite uncomfortable and doesn't feel like a proper latch but it's a bit closer. There's no deep tugging sensation the way there usually is, and my boob isn't softening much - but I am hearing long swallows. Does that sound like a reliable indication she's getting something from the breast? It's a long way from back to normal, but I think it's a step in the right direction!

That does sound like real progress. Keep going. But dont hesitate to get the latch looked at.