I need to breastfeed for at least a year but am not sure what I am doing!!

[collision]

I breastfed ds for only 14 weeks as I really didnt know what I was doing and was given so much conflicting advice that I got confused! I was encouraged to bf in the rugby ball style with ds under an arm which was more difficult as he got bigger! I ended up mainly expressing it and giving it to him by bottle. I need to go back to basics and learn how to bf from the beginning.

Formula is so expensive over here ......about £20 for a kilo and so I am determined to bf for as long as I can. These are my questions.....

1. How long do I bf for on each breast? I know about hind and fore milk etc so do I stay on longer so it will get the hind milk? 2 Do I swap boobs each feed? 3 Do I try for a routine early on or feed on demand?

Anything else you can think of I would be grateful to hear.......Mears.......would love to hear from you too please. TIA

1. when baby is tiny - for as long as he/she wants. Later (after 3 weeks or so), then if your baby is still feeding for inordinately long periods of time then maybe think about a dummy and take it from there. But in general, the thing about bf-ing is that every woman, and every baby is different.

2. not at first - after a few weeks when your milk supply is settled then you can, but let your baby dictate it: ds sometimes has just one side, and sometimes screams until he gets the other one.

3. I fed ds and dd on demand at first, hoping to gradually settle into a routine after a few weeks. Dd settled quite easily, ds didn't. I am still feeding ds at 8 months though so I must be doing something right!

I found with both babies that it is sometimes easier to feed lying down. This was especially true in the early days with dd - I think because I didn't have the hang of the sitting up position, and later on with both of them: ds is too nosey to feed really well any other way.

BF 2 babies now (currently feeding DD) and never mastered the rugby style hold!

Different babies = different feeding. DS always had both sides, DD could only cope with both from about 4 months old. DS was more routine, DD more demand...

Echo most of what SP says apart from the lying down bit. I always sit up to feed and then put them down. They both slept in their own cots (next to our bed) and then in their own rooms happily. Some of my friends who have fed lying down have got in the 'trap' of feeding their babies to sleep and feeding constantly through the night months later...

Good luck. It isn't always easy but stick with it and it is great.

This leaflet might help you - takes a minute to download.

leaflet

I would asy demand feed from the beginning but that means ensuring babies feed reularly at least 3 hourly. Some demand fed babies would sleep 12 hours apart initially and that is not goof for milk supply. Fixing the baby is extremely improtant. Feeds should not be timed but feeds that cause painful nipples and that go on for hours are a sign that the baby is not fixed properly. Offer the second breast after the first. Baby does not need to take it. Some babies like 2 breasts, some are happy with one. Have trust in your body to feed your baby. You can do it. At least you know you can express . You obviously had the ability to make milk - such a shame you got into a pickle last time. Hopefully the leaflet I posted and Babyfriendly site will help. Mumsnet will also be helpful

weve bf for 16 weeks so far and loving it
Heres some answers

1. As long as baby wants, DD feed for 10 mins total but others take 40 mins. Agree with the other message about dummies. Youll soon notice that a baby is sucking for comfort as the muscles under their ears dont move and they dont swallow. If that happens take the baby off and offer a dummy should you wish to.
2. DD only ever wanted the one but now at 16 weeks has started to take both. Offer the 2nd boob and if it doesnt want it it wont take it.
3. We feed on demand as couldnt stick to a routine. I think babies are like us, sometimes they get hungry earlier than dinner time and sometimes not until later. We feed roughly every 3 hrs during the day and when baby cries at night(approx 4-5hrs) I agree with mears to wake your baby if it sleeps during the day for longer than 3.5hrs to help establish your milk supply and ensure baby is well fed ready for the night. Hope this helps. Have confidence in yourself and youll be fine.

When dds were newborn i'd do about 20 minutes on one boob (no longer than 40mins if they just kept going) and then next feed i'd do 10 mins on the boob i'd fed from last time and then 10 ish on the other. Once they get a big bigger ie 2 months i'd do both boobs but always start off on the boob last fed from. Try not to fret too much as it will just suddenly click and as long as there's weight gain i wouldn't worry, they'll let you know when they want more!!!

What do you think Collision?

Collision ...
I know how you feel ... I felt very similar when I was pregnant with DD. I had given up feeding DS very early and really wanted to make it work with my next baby ...
One thing I will say is: Don't put too much pressure on yourself. Take it each step at a time. I told myself that I would be happy if I managed to get past 6 weeks (which is when I gave up with DS). I then said let's see if we can get to 3 months. Then I thought, well if I can manage 4 months I have done well. That turned into 5 months, 6 months and now at 7.5 months we are doing well. I have never said I need to breastfeed for a year as that seemed like too much pressure. It is only now that I can see that I can go that long if I (and DD) wanted to.
In answer to your questions:

1. and 2) Until DD was about 3 months she fed from one boob per feed. From that age, after a good feed from one she would fuss and I would try the other and she would feed for a bit longer from that one and then at the next feed I would start on that boob. I think that the idea is to stay with one for as long as possible to get the hind milk - if you move to the other too quickly then they end up with too much fore milk. I was also told that you can tell if a baby has too much fore milk as their poos have a green tinge and I could see that in DD. It is hard to say how long you must feed for because all babies are different ... some feed for 40 minutes but my baby has never ever fed for longer than 15 in one go ... Now she is older her feeds take only 5 minutes.
2. This is what I did from day one in regards to 'routine' ... I fed her during the day every 3 hours whether she cried for it or not. I never let her go for longer than that. But, I never made her wait - so if she wanted feeding before the 3 hours was up I fed her and counted 3 hours from then. That way I got my milk flowing quickly and she was never frantic for milk. From 10pm I let her go for as long as she wanted and so from day one her longest sleep was at night ... I think at 3 weeks she was going from 10pm to 3am. It was only at 3/4 weeks that I started a routine of sorts ... HTH ...

brilliant.......thanks everyone.....am going to print this off and then work with it when baby is born....not due til November but wanted to be prepared as I know how brain dead I will be when the baby is born!!

How soon should I introduce a bottle with expressed milk?? Dont want the situation where he wont take a bottle but dont want to do it too soon.

Good luck when the baby arrives. All you need to concern yourself with is obtaining a good latch regardless of the position you hold the baby in. I fell so engorged in the early days that the rugby hold seems most comfortable but make sure to support your baby on a pillow (or several) so that he/she can latch without having to stretch. I always offer both sides and start the next feed on the breast they finished on )mainly to make sure that it is stimulated enough). Lying down to feed is also great but be careful not to nod off - it is very tempting and after disturbed nights... Don't lie down to feed on the sofa unless there is someone with you as the baby can easily slip down into cushions if you're a bit sleepy.
As for introducing the bottle - I wouldn't until your supply is well-established.
I have only ever fed on demand and not had any problem with it. Some babies are little and often whereas others like to feast and then sleep. You won't know what yours is until November.
Anyway, children nagging so must close. Have breast fed well into second year for all three children incidentally and they have all been different and preferred different feeding positions!

Put basbaies nose against your nipple - this will encourgae her /him to open mouth wide enough and 'milk' breast properly, also make sure you drink plenty of fluid.

Went to Breastfeeding class the other night and although I had breastfed DD for 3 months I was amazed at what the women said and it seemed that most problems are down to the posiitioning of the baby!!

One thing I had to say to counsellor though was women are not failure's if they cannot breastfeed or do not do it for as long as the NCT would like!!

twinkie....did counsellor give impresh women were failures? It's not an official view, believe me!

Fluid intake needs to be no more than you need to satisfy thirst, by the way

maybe also get a good book on it? 'The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding' (I know, I know, whoever thought of that title didn't do the book any favours ) is very good, with plenty of solutions to possible problems and advice for all sorts of situations. Available from Amazon worldwide.

Both fo the classesI have beent o sort of implied that you were a failure if you was not thinking of breastfeeding or could not get along with it - I did say tot he woman that a new mum probably feels more useless from negative attitudes tonot being able to breastfeed than the actual guiltof not being able to breastfeed but the woman was not too happy to hear my input - mind you I cocked up the NCT classes as a whole as they were trying to be quite negative about drugs and a few other things and I told them that their attitude was not healthy and if I were a first time mum I would feel bad having any drugs after their protestations that you should be up and about rolling around on a birth ball being massaged by your partner and not giving not the nasty epidural man!!

Their attitude did piss me of a bit I thought it better to give a well rounded view but let people know that either way the best way to get a lovely experience was to go with what made you and your partner (well no actually you!!) happy.

This is something we try very hard to get right in classes, twinkie....we aim to give people information about breastfeeding, and to try and increase confidence in it, as confidence in it is an important part of actually managing to do it, without making anyone feel they are somehow a 'failure' if they decide they don't want to do it, or don't do it as long as they planned to. It can be hard to get that right for everyone in the class.

I don't know how you can quantify feeling bad because of negative attitudes to not breastfeeding and compare it to feeling bad because of guilt feelings, and saying, as you do, that the negative attitudes make her feel worse.

Surely this depends on the person, what she feels and what she perceives in the attitudes around her....which will not be the same for everyone. If I had been the bf counsellor in the class and you had expressed the idea that the negative attitudes are worse, I would have resisted this, purely on the grounds that no one can generalise in this way

I think a well-rounded view about drugs and childbirth includes giving the pluses and the minuses of every form of pain relief, including the pluses and minuses of the birth ball....a plus is that it puts you in control, a minus is that it does not take the pain away as well as an epidural (to pick one example). For some people removal of pain is more important than control. For others, it's the other way round.

A good class should help you decide what feels right for you.