worried about weight gain, need reassurance

[silverfrog]

I am fairly confidet that all is well, but could just do with some reassurance.

Dd2 was born is 22 weeks old. She was 7lb 13 at birth, and is totally bf. She has always been happy and relaxed, and feeds well (seems to tail off every 4 or 5 days for a day or so, then feeds again with renewed vigour. She has always done this, so I assume its just her natural feeding pattern).

The problem is that she only weighs 13lb 1 now. She is putting on 1-2 oz each week, which is relly not a lot. She was born over the 50th centile, happily settled to around the 25th (which is more where I was expecting her to be), but is now slowly but surely dropping further and further.

She is, though, extremely happy, goes 3-4 hours btween feeds, and sleeps through from 11pm ish to 7 am ish. surely she would b demanding more if actually hungry?

Am keen to hold off weaning as long as poss, especially since she doesn't seem to want more, but am a little concerned about her lack of weight gain

(Hi silverfrog, my dd was born 8lb 5oz so 75th percentile. She gradually dropped down to the 2nd where she has been for the last 4 months. She is now 7months old. I got very stressed about this and the HV's really stressed me out about it too. So much so that I stopped bf after 2 months as I was worried about my milk supply/that she wasn't latching properly etc and so expressed milk to bottle feed for another two and a half months, this made no difference. DH and I are both quite skinny so I think it is just the way she is meant to be and it certainly isn't a problem for her developmentally as she has been sitting up since 5 months and is currently pulling herself up on the furniture. So I wouldn't worry, after a slow start (at 6 months) my LO is now wolfing down solids so I am hoping that this may help her fatten up a bit. I am putting lots of butter and cheese in her food, good for her but no so good for me as I usually finish anything sh eodesn't eat

So I wouldn't worry I am sure she is fine and she just isn't a big eater and is not gentically menat to be big. IME the HV's really stress about it but The GP's are much more relaxed about the whole thing.

I stopped going to the weighing clinic as I got so fed up of the HV's making me feel that there was a problem and that I was doing something wrong.

Hope that reassures you a bit

SF- I have been there too & I too stopped going to the weigh ins as I found the HV where not at all understanding, only loked at weight gain & nothing else.I am a believever in looking at the baby & how they are, are they contenet in every other way? The sleeping sounds good & by the sound of things you know the your LO is fine. Its very hard but try to go with your instinct, you are mum & know your LO best. You dont sound as if you feel there is an underlying problem so have faith in what you are doing which is really commendable.
Good luck & I know its not easy but try to close your ears to all the doubters.

Many bf babies do not fit the pattern of those charts and some babies are always going to be smaller than others. If you think she is healthy in every other way and she is sleeping through - a rare thing in BF babies - then don't panic too much.
If you are worried speak to a HV that is trained in BFing.

If she is gaining and not losing then personally I would be happy with her progress, especially as she gets towards 6m. My DD stayed the same weight and woke almost hourly between 20 and 26 weeks but I faught the temptation to wean early and don't regret it now as she has bounced back to right up to the 75th% now (10m).

Many thanks for your replies.

I know that dd2 is happy and content, and to look at her, she is really quite chubby - she just doesn't seem to weigh anyhting.

I think I am most bemused as dd1 is enormous and off the top of the scales for both height and weight (not sure where she's got that from) and now dd2 seems to be heading in the opposite direction.

The bit that bothered me most is that the HV said this was quite frequent in 2nd babies, as they have to be more laid back, and she might be feeding enough to satisfy her but not enough to put on weight. Apparently 2nd (and subsequent) children don't complain as much as this is how their life has alays been and they get used to it? so she was basically saying that I'm too busy with dd1 (3 next week) to attend to dd2 properly! Surely dd2 would let me know if she wanted more?

Can't help but feel guilty as dd1 is ASD so does take up more time and attention, and dd2 does get overlooked a little, especially since she is so easy (and, lets face it, until recently, what exactly has she needed other than food, comfort and warmth) so I feel that what HV said about feeding enough to satisfy but not to really fill her up might be true. But then it can't be as dd2 is so happy between feeds, and sleeps really well etc. And she is putting on weight, albeit really slowly.

Oh its just so confusing.

I think your HV is talking rubbish personally and it makes me very that she's knocking your confidence like this. I think the real reason second babies are more laid back is because their parents are more confident and know what they're doing! It sounds as though your baby is doing fine, but if you're concerned then just offer her feeds more frequently.