11 week old refusing the breast. Very stressed :(

[Gobletoffire]

My 11 week old DS is mainly breastfed and for the first few weeks breastfeeding was going great, no issues at all and gained weight brilliantly. He also has approximately two 5oz bottles of formula per week, in an evening if he has one. I posted a few weeks ago because I encountered a problem where he was refusing to feed from the left breast. This was resolved after a few days and I never knew the reason why. Well for the past couple of days he keeps refusing both breasts and cries when I try and get him to latch, from both sides and different positions (tried cradle hold and lying down which he was fine with before). He is clearly hungry as he is agitated and rooting but then wails when I bring him to the breast. I have persevered over the past couple of days with lots of skin on skin and eventually he will latch and have a good feed but today I just cannot get him to feed. I ended up giving him a bottle of formula which he guzzled down so was clearly hungry. A lady from a breastfeeding support group came round yesterday and tried different positions with me but typically the problem wasn’t as bad yesterday! I just don’t understand why this is happening or what to do. I have expressed some milk but I don’t want to just give him bottled expressed milk and would like to carry on feeding him from the breast but this is making me quite stressed and upset. Any ideas or suggestions?

Google 'nursing strike'. It's quite common--I've experienced it a few times with DD. Have you tried walking around while cradling him with your breasts out?

Probably Google 'breastfeeding nursing strike' actually, or you're liable to get nhs strike info!

Have you tried expressing a little bit and rubbing it on your nipple? Sounds weird I know but perhaps the smell will entice him to latch easier?

Or could you try nipple guards?

My thought is, if he's preferring the rubber teat of a bottle then the nipple guards might replicate that but you still get to feed him from the breast? Could you try that with a view to gradually weaning him off them?

Have you got a consultant close by. Thrush is another reason it might happen.

kellymom.com/ages/newborn/nb-challenges/back-to-breast/

This website is so so good for all breastfeeding issues. Try and find a lactation consultant in your area and give them a call also.

Thanks everyone for your advice. If he’s very sleepy then he will latch on, and also giving him a bottle for a couple of minutes then transferring him straight to the breast also works. I just hope tomorrow it’ll be easier! I really don’t want to give up breastfeeding but feel like we keep encountering issues at the min.

I’ve checked for thrush, his mouth looks fine and his tongue is only white after milk or if he’s been sick and it rubs off so I assume he hasn’t got it. He woke twice in the night for a feed and latched on fine then. He last had milk at 7:15 and it’s now 9:25, I’ve tried again and he’s getting agitated and not even trying to latch. Is it possible he’s just not hungry? DH says I’m trying to force it on him too much when he doesn’t need it. I think I’m comparing him too much to when he was tiny and feeding constantly so might be assuming he’s hungry more often than what he is now?

Is he demonstrating any feeding cues at all?

If he's not, then he's probably not hungry.

See how he goes? My DS was (and still is) a very boob orientated baby (though 2 isn't really a baby anymore). He fed loads but at 12 weeks he started going for 3 hours between feeds on a good day. At night, he started going 4 hours between feeds at about 16-20 weeks? All babies are different obvs so maybe yours is spacing his feeds out a bit more?

@PlinkPlink yes I think you’re right, he goes 4-5 hours between feeds at night now, although they are big feeds, so I suppose he’s not going to want to nurse as much in the day either. I have managed to get him to latch today but only when he is sleepy. Unless he’s half asleep he won’t even try to latch and turns away and cries or becomes agitated. It’s exhausting.

No advice but just reassurance. DS now 7.5mo, went through several fussy phases like this, as did some FF babies I know. Each phase lasted a week or 3, but his weight was fine and weaning solved the problem. Hang in there!