tiktok, mears, or any other nice lady with bf advice to spare

[pinguthepenguin]

I'm at my wits end....my 9 day old baby, lovely as she is, is driving me up the left with constant feeding and I'm afraid that I'm going to crack and give her a bottle. I so want to be able to carry on, I just need to know that this is temporary.
She seems to be feeding every 1-2 hours, and sleeping so little, that I can't believe she is a newborn. Today for example, she has been at the breast for a total of 10 hours and slept for only 1hr 45min. Surely sleeping for so little isn't normal?
I know she is only tiddly and wants me for comfort, but It's absolutely exhausting and of course, impractical to be tied to her for as long as I am. When she does go longer than an hour between feeds, she makes up for it by then staying at the breast for up to two hours. She has only just this minute had a 1.5 hour feed and then screamed for more....I couldn't take any more and got DP to take her in the car for a drive while I've cried in frustration at home.
I've spoken to the mw who assures me this is normal....but the thing is, for how long for?
The thing I don't understand is, she doesn't always seem to be drinking, just suckling. Does this mean she's just using me as a dummy? I try to sit her up and me more alert to ensure a better feed, but she won't be put down in her crib, falling asleep only at the breast.
If she doesn't get the breast in her mouth as quickly as she likes, she screams and gets herself into such a state that she is too hysterical to actually latch on, and pushes the breast away with both fists. This means I have to respond to her cries for food in double quick time in order to avoid this.
Also- as I type this, my breasts feel empty, as she had both of them before she left. Does this mean I'm currently empty, or that my supply is low, or that she isn't getting enough?
Please could someone help me understand the way the whole thing works, and give me some inspiration to keep going. Any ideas on how I could encourage her to sleep a little more during the day would be helpful also. I'm pretty sure she should be exhausted, but the only thing she wants to do is eat.....

pingu....just caught this thread, and I hope that things are getting better.

Just something holly was saying on the pn thread, but have you checked for tongue tie? She was having probs with her DS and took him to the bf counsellor. It turns out he had tongue tie. its been snipped and things have improved instantly. She's put a few links on the PN thread about it.

My DD has been doing the constant feeding and frustrated and angry stuff over the weekend, but its settled down already and today she has been feeding well then sleeoing four hours. I've been (rightly or wrongly ) giving her a finger to suck when I feel she's just comfort sucking and it seems to be working. She's 22 days old now, and I can assure you it does get better....I'm getting a decent amount of sleep at a stretch and no longer feel like a zombie. Hang on in there you are doing a great job!

Girls, Thankyou so much for your support.

Daisy- it's funny you mention the tongue tie-the mw happened to mention the other day that she did indeed have an itsy bitsy bit of one, but nothing that would in any way affeect her feeding. She seems to get on the breast ok- although I have noticed that the initial latch is getting more and more painful each time she goes on. It does settle after 10-15 secs or so. Is this normal?
I took her out in her pram for the first time today and she slept for nearly 2 hours- it was lovely
She still wants to feed constantly, but as long as know it's all to a good end,and that it's temporary I know I can do it. Does anyone think they could give me a rough idea of how long the initial feeding frenzy lasts? I mean, I won't be back on here in 8 weeks asking tha same thing will I?

pingu x

For some babies a very obvious tongue-tie causes no problems and for others a slight tongue-tie causes a lot.

Hi Pingu!

I think the initial feeding frenzy really depends on the baby and they're all different!

I remember how unprepared I was for the demands of bf and kept a diary of feeds to show the midwife as I thought it couldn't possibly be right - or fair, - how much DS1 was demanding to feed!

I looked back on the diary just last week, and around 9/10 days I was spending 16 hours in 24 with LO attached.

I can't remember when things got easier for me, but I remember people quoting six weeks as a turning point for them (which will probably sound like '8 years' to you) but it does go faster than you could believe!

Good luck!

Hi pingu, no advice really but just wanted to sympathise. God these first weeks are tough!

Is there a bf support group you can go to. I know it's early days to be venturing out and having to face a huge room full of strangers (I did it on Tuesday and reversed my car into a wall !) but the advice I got while I was there was great, plus it's also quite a reassuring experience to meet both other mothers who are struggling, and mother who are further along and doing brilliantly, you look at them with there 2 month old and think it will get better.

Good luck x

Sorry, going to keep adding more posts as I read up the thread!

Haven't tried it myself yet but the bf counsellor showed me how to swaddle dd to get her latched on. Lay her on a large sheet then wrap one side over her arm and tuck it under her back, then the same on the other side so she is swaddled only on her arms not body. Once she is latched on you should release the sheet and her arms to allow her to stroke the breast which is an important part of the feeding process. Hope that makes sense!

My ds had tongue tie and FWIW the nurse AND paed. both said it would not be contributing to feeding difficulties. I insisted on a referral to paed. surgeon as I was sure that it was part, if not all, of the problem. The surgeon ALSO said it would not be causing feeding probs but said he would snip it anyway which he did there and then. I fed ds 30mins later and the difference was immediate, everything just improved from there.. might be worth getting a second opinion?