Formula fed newborn- advice please

[Bobfossil4]

I am ftm to 6 week old who was a hefty 11lb 1oz at birth!

After failing at breastfeeding I have been formula feeding for the past two weeks.

I have been feeding on demand, simply because that’s how I was breastfeeding so I didn’t even think there was another way to do it- he will feed anywhere between every 1.5-4 hours but usually every 3. I make 5oz bottles which he will often have almost all of, but there’s usually some milk left. Sometimes he just has 3oz.

Over the 24 hours he has been having approx 26-28oz in a day, usually having around 7-8 bottles. In the night he has been feeding at 11ish, 3ish and then 6. But this is very approximate as it changes!

The point of my post is this- my MIL and SIL said I should be feeding every four hours and not feeding on demand. They said be would empty the bottle if I did that and that he shouldn’t be having more than 5 bottles in 24 hours. They said when he cries for food I should try distracting him rather than making a bottle.

I’m worried now because baby is quite large and I don’t want to be overfeeding him. I have just been offering milk when he cries with hunger. Should I have a better system? Am I setting him up to over eat?

I’ve always fed on demand. At six weeks you should have your GP and HV reviews. They will be able to weigh your baby and give you advice to follow.

Keep doing what you're doing. Advice now is to feed on demand with formula. Baby knows what they need. Four-hour feeding of such a small baby is a very old-fashioned approach.

Carry on doing exactly as you are. Smile and nod at MIL and SIL. He'll fall into a routine soon enough, the 4 hour thing is a minimum not an optimum, newborns need to be fed.

But 11lbs 1oz? Bloody hell woman. What type of birth did you have?

Be guided by your baby
All babies are different. Some want to feed more often that others, and some want more milk.
Just follow your baby's lead.
Feed them when they seem hungry and don't worry if they don't finish the bottle.

• from nhs website.

I think demand feeding actually teaches them to maintain their appetite rather than encourage over feeding. I also really don't like the idea of trying to stretch out babies unnaturally, if I'm hungry I'm hungry!

I did the same as you and baby fed as much or as little as he fancied at each bottle, Never really went over 3 hours unless an odd occasion when he slept longer. He is nearly 6 months and still has his bottle every 3 ish hours, he doesn’t want to go longer as he gets very vocal about it!
Do what you think is right and works and tell MIL and SIL that this is how you do it and it works for you both,
Smile and nod

Wow everyone. Thank you so much for responding so quickly. I’m generally fairly laid back but this has got to me a little because I thought I was doing it all wrong!

But 11lbs 1oz? Bloody hell woman. What type of birth did you have?
Failed forceps and c section. (I mention the forceps so that you feel sorry for me )

Please keep feeding on demand. Follow your baby's lead and give food when they're hungry. Little babies don't understand greed or gluttony and they don't work to schedules. They just know when they're hungry. remember their tummies are small and need filled regularly.
You're doing great.
Tell others that you appreciate their opinion but you're happy to follow current advice and that is to feed on demand.
Oh also your wording of 'failing at breastfeeding' made me sad. Please don't see it as failure. Sometimes it just doesn't work. Not a failure, just life.


Failed forceps and c section. (I mention the forceps so that you feel sorry for me)

Absolutely! You hero. Trust what you're doing. If baby is putting on weight you're doing fine. It's so tough to know if you're doing "the right thing" but in reality that's only the right thing for right now. You're doing a great job. What sausageandrashers said about bf is totally right too. No failure, just a dofferent option. Be kind to yourself.

Babies are ment to get 2.5ounce for every pound of body weight, so ur wee one should've been getting roughly 27.5 in 24hours when born (he's obviously put weight on the past 6 week so whatever he weighs now times it by 2.5) This is upto 4-6 months till you introduce solids. Getting in a consistent feeding routine is great but sometimes babies like fewer ounce more often and fine as long as their getting enough x

Jeez, I do feel sorry for you, OP

I second what everyone else has been saying. It used to blow my mind hpw opinionated some people can get with regards to how you bring your child up. In my experience, just follow your baby's lead and listen to your instinct. I know what you mean too, I felt I had 'failed' at breastfeeding. Looking back now I know I tried my best and that's all that matters. Fed is best and all that.

Ftm of formula fed baby (now 14m old) after BF didnt work out. Feeding on demand is what the evidence says is the best way, teaching babes as pp said to regulate own appetite and seems to lead to lower levels of obesity etc in adult life so you are doing all the right things and your GP & HV will advise you of this too.

Distracting a hungry six week old.........good luck with that!! There are so many variables, growth spurts, illness, comfort, thirst etc that effect feeding on a day to day basis that you just have to roll with it. I don't know how many times in the last year Ive said 'he cant be hungry AGAIN' . But my LB has followed the 50th percentile nicely, he's definately not overweight & is really good at knowing hunger, thirst etc and communicates this to us.

Also, I second the well done for not only birthing an 11lb baby (however delivered) but carrying aswell!!!

Good luck your doing great x

I know, I don’t know how I carried that baby about! Both me and dh are tall but no one expected such a chunk!

Thank you all so so much for taking the time to comment with your experiences. You’ve completely put my mind at rest.

I don't think DS stretched to 4 hours until he was about 4 months old. We fed on demand until about 3 months old then settled him into a 3 hour routine, he was ready at that stage.
Trust your instincts and gut, let your baby take the lead. I recently had a heath visitor tell me I needed to cut DS's milk intake in half as he's now weaning. He's a 50th centile baby always has been and takes 40-45ozs of milk a day. After stressing about it for a few days I checked in with our baby group who advised it was wrong advice, HV has no idea what my DS is eating and milk should be their main source of calories and nutrition until they are 1. He'll eventually drop his feeds himself! I wish I had of trusted my gut and ignored the advice. Being a FTM is nerve wracking!
Also 11lb 1oz you absolute trooper for carrying that around inside you, you must have felt amazing afterwards!!

They are wrong, you're doing it right. It's best to let baby reject the last bit of bottle specifically so you're OK with them rejecting a bit more and not enticing them to have just a little bit more :) It's good that the amount he has changes as it shows you're being responsive to his appetite. More than 5 feeds in 24 hours is expected and normal at this age, definitely.

If that wasn't clear - the idea baby "should" finish the bottle is what sets them up to overeat. It's best to let them finish on their own terms.