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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Please can you help me decide when to stop BFing??

30 replies

PutThatInYourPipeandSmokeIt · 04/06/2007 19:44

My DD will be 6 months in a couple of weeks. I just can't decide when I should give up BFing her and go on to formula, to mix or to just keep going.

I tink my positives are all the usual ones, so I won't bother listing them!

My negatives against BFing are:
I loathe expressing and it's always hit and miss whether or not I get enough to give to her childminder (3 mornings a week - mon, wed & fri) and I find that quite stressful. As a result of the expressing thing, I also stress about having enough milk in a bottle to give to any babysitter should she need it while we're out and that subconciously affects my willingness to go out I think.

My negatives against FFing are:
It feels like cheating (I have no idea why and I have no negative feelings towards those that do FF!).

It feels selfish to stop BFing as it would be for me, not for DD.

I worry that as things are always advancing, that there may be something in formula that we don't yet know to be harmful.

What would you do if you were me???

OP posts:
whomovedmychocolate · 04/06/2007 19:49

What are the positives for both for you? It's a purely personal decision and I don't think anyone can make it for you. But you have done really well to get to six months and if you do decide to stop you shouldn't feel guilty.

Maternal love is shown in a lot more ways than just breastfeeding.

Would you consider mix feeding? It's not ideal because it's hard to keep your supply up but perhaps as a transitional method if you do decide to stop?

ArtichokeTagine · 04/06/2007 19:50

My DD is 9 months and I am still BFing. I hate expressing too and can't get much milk at all when I do. DD goes to nursery and by 8 months only needed 1 small bottle during the day. I sent her with calcium fortified rice milk which she liked. Now she has no milk in the day (I send her with water and she keeps full on solids).

Its up to you what you do but if your only negatives are around expressing then keep in mind you won't have to express much once she is on solids. Or keep BFing but don't express. Send her to the child minder with something natural like rice milk.

Good luck.

SenoraPostrophe · 04/06/2007 19:51

I would give formula in the mornings (at the childminder's), but continue to bf first thing and in the afternoons. Expressing is a faff, you're right, but it'd be a shame if your dislike of expressing made you give up bf entirely.

RE additives to formula: I used to mix feed dd. She got on with the cheapest, simplest formula best (i.e. the stuff that's pretty much the same as it was 20 years ago). It's unlikely that anything in formula is harmful as such though, beyond the fact that it doesn't have the benefits of breastfeeding.

as for the babysitter - I'm afraid i'm not going to comment on that, as response would probably include the phrases "pah" and "not 6 months" and "go out??"

ArtichokeTagine · 04/06/2007 19:52

I should clarify that I BF her first thing as soon as I pick her up and again before bed. She does still need milk!

bizziebee · 04/06/2007 19:53

My dd is also nearly six months and I am trying to decide the same. I think i am going to introduce more formula as she gradually gets older but keep up the bfeeding as it is so convenient if she wakes up early in the morning.

WanderingTrolley · 04/06/2007 19:54

At 6 months she might be ok at the childminder without ebm, if you feed her right before you leave her there, and as soon as you arrive to collect her.

Original poster
PutThatInYourPipeandSmokeIt · 04/06/2007 19:57

oooh rice milk - I've never heard of it - is it iron rich? A breast milk or cow's alternative?

The childminder mornings are a bit of a stressy because I end up sending her off with one bottle of 260mls (large avent brimming full), which she drains about 1.5 hours after first morning feed with me. I then have to make sure there's another bottle in tow of a min of 120mls) incase she gets hungry later on in the morning. I find that quite a lot to express over 2 days and I feel I'm only one feed away from having to break open the formula all the time! Would it be terrible to send her with one full bottle of breast milk and then a carton of formula as back up?

OP posts:
foxcub · 04/06/2007 19:59

I don't feel I can advise you but can tell you what I did, which was to let the childminder give one bottle of formular during the day. I continued BF morning and evening, which meant my DCs got the benefits of extended BFing, and I got the lovely quiet feeding time with them after work etc, but without the hassle of expressing for the CM.

Original poster
PutThatInYourPipeandSmokeIt · 04/06/2007 19:59

If I did give her formula at the CMs, I would in effect be missing one feed every other morning - would that affect my supply at all?

OP posts:
SenoraPostrophe · 04/06/2007 20:01

it shouldn't do if you're currently exclusively bf-ing, but you may find you have to drop that morning feed entirely, or express a little while she's at CM's (to stop your tits from exploding).

Original poster
PutThatInYourPipeandSmokeIt · 04/06/2007 20:01

You're all being great - I can see that you're all trying really hard not to come across as bossy or judgemental and don't worry - I'm made of sterner stuff. I just want to thrash through all of this to get to an end point that I'm happy with, so please don't feel you have to be polite!

OP posts:
SenoraPostrophe · 04/06/2007 20:02

but blimey, you can get a full bottle! no, giving a carton of formula as backup would be fine imo.

WanderingTrolley · 04/06/2007 20:02

I've looked after a lot of babies who are mix-fed and I don't think it is the same size of problem at 6 months that it is at birth.

fishie · 04/06/2007 20:03

you may well find she wants less milk as she starts to eat food, so you wouldn't need to express anyway. she'll be scoffing toast and apples instead of second bottle in no time.

i'd keep up the feeding, did find it invaluable for reconnecting after day at work and nice and snuggly before getting up.

Original poster
PutThatInYourPipeandSmokeIt · 04/06/2007 20:03

But what will happen once I start introducing solids - how long will it take for my supply to be affected as a result of that?

OP posts:
fishie · 04/06/2007 20:04

oh but do give up the expressing, sounds hellish i never managed it and ds is bf at 2yrs.

SenoraPostrophe · 04/06/2007 20:05

your supply doesn't get affected by solids because you give solids in addition to their normal milk. the only tyhing you must be careful of is giving more than one ff in a row - that's what i did with dd and why we stopped bfing. But I know plenty of people who mix fed for months with set feeds ff and set feeds bf.

fishie · 04/06/2007 20:06

sorry incoherent, throes of bedtime here. nothing much happened to me when i started dropping feeds, i think about 7-8m, but shouldn't be much difference. mid morning was the first to go.

WanderingTrolley · 04/06/2007 20:06

Her main nutrition will come from milk for a good while yet - I think milk consumption (breast or formula) varies from baby to baby, so it's farking hard to blardy predict what one baby will do.

PS the farking and blardy are to show you I am not polite. do hope that helps

Original poster
PutThatInYourPipeandSmokeIt · 04/06/2007 20:10

Ah. Is 'WanderingTrolley' a polite version of 'WanderingTrollied'

OP posts:
Original poster
PutThatInYourPipeandSmokeIt · 04/06/2007 20:12

You are brilliant - between all of you, I think I will for the short term, express one bog bottle for her to go off with and formula as back up and see where we are when she starts solids etc and revise then. I feel better already!! Thanks loads and three cheers for MNetters and all your worldly wisdom

OP posts:
Original poster
PutThatInYourPipeandSmokeIt · 04/06/2007 20:12

or possibly, one big bottle.....

OP posts:
bookthief · 04/06/2007 20:23

Now that my ds is 6 months I've left formula a couple of times when I've left him for a few hours rather than ebm. Like you I find expressing a right pain & I never managed to get a stock in the freezer so I would always be attached to my pump in the middle of the night if I was going anywhere the next day.

I was keen to exclusively bf for 6 months and did develop irrational feelings about formula (probably in part as a way of getting me through the tough times). It felt very odd the first time I gave him a bottle of formula rather than bm. It's just food though, just the same as the other foods I now give him in addition to bm. I know you know that though!

The only possible problem with your plan is that some babies just don't take to formula. If that's not the case with you then go for it.

whomovedmychocolate · 04/06/2007 20:36

We are weaning DD - seven and a half months onto solids, plus BM and my supply has actually INCREASED because the little bugger has got more efficient at feeding, so I wouldn't worry on that score. Supply expands to fit the demand (now in 34F bra, up from 34DD when I had her too!)

dollydumps · 04/06/2007 20:50

I was really sad when I gave up bf and actually cried when |I read that bit on the formula pack that says "not a replacement for breast milk" "breast is best" or words to that effect. I felt like I was a bad mother for giving up although to be honest when I started on solids she totally lost interest in milk and the only way i could get her to take more than a couple of sucks, was to give her a bottle.

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