Can BF be learned from a book?

[DivaSkyChick]

It seems that successful BF is really luck of the draw. Maybe your baby is a "natural", maybe you get ignorant / busy / vile mws, maybe a lovely expert comes along, maybe the damage is too great before you get help, etc etc.

Is there anything that can be done ahead of time to ensure success? I've heard antenatal classes give you some advice but have also heard they often deny problems exist "if you're doing it right." Well that's no help, is it?

Is this like labor, where you just don't know how it will go until you find out your fucked? sorry for the language but I'm getting pretty upset looking at the posts here.

In my own personal experience, no.

I think you can get some helpful advice from books. Things like techniques, different holds, what to look for to see if baby is feeding properly and milk is flowing, that kind of thing.

A lot is down to trial and error. My first didn't do so well initially, second and third were straight on immediately chomping away. That raised a different set of problems as was sore, cracked and bleeding.

There's a lot of advice (I like to remember that a lot of MWs haven't had babies themselves so may not know that actually it does farking toe-curlingly hurt when they latch on and it doesn't necessarily mean they aren't on correctly!).

Best piece of advice I can give is try to relax. My community midwife advised me to express by hand into a sterile container and dribble into DS1 by sterile teaspoon. Worked a treat. Only tiny, tiny amounts, but bought me a little time in the early days to get things going. We, as new mothers, do tend to panic that we aren't nourishing our babies and we get in a right state about it. And sometimes it doesn't work, sometimes it takes a while and other times it works a treat.

I'm having number 4 due in 4 weeks and despite bf the other 3 successfully I still have a box of formula and bottles ready and waiting just in case. Whatever gets you through

I agree books help but you really need one to one assistance when you start. My hosp runs a breastfeeding course aswell as antenatal classes. I found this a great help to understand the theory behind a good latch. I really struggled in the beginning coz of a v.sleepy baby but my breastfeeding advisor gave me the confidence to persevere. You have to be prepared for your mw to put your boob in babes mouth to help with latch on. this might sound intrusive but you prob won't care as long as it means you get off on the right foot.

Don't worry too much even if you don't get support in hosp. there are no problems that can't be overcome with advice. try nct help line or mumsnet of course!

oh and buy lansinoh! its about £10 a tube but it lasts forever and is fantastic. I struggled through with sore nips for the first week until mw gave me a free sample - its miracle stuff!

ooh, Smallone - talking about bf on MN is SO scary

Yes, Lansinoh is fantastic.

And IME eating chocolate gives them wind (you eating it, obviously, not the baby!) That's the kind of thing books are good for. the technicalities of breastfeeding.

oh yes certain foods definitely upset them - I'm trying to black out the nappies produced after I had garlic bread!

I've found that plain choc is fine its only the milk choc that upsets dd. thank god don't think I could carry on with bf malarkey without regular chocolate dose!

Now that is worth knowing Smallone! Am going to pass it onto my ante-natal thread immediately!

Hope it helps!

my other top tip for DivaSkyChick is to learn to breastfeed lying down in bed, I've found it a life saver. One of my friends was never shown this and had to fill the bed with pillows to support her and babe so they could both sleep sitting up - what a nightmare!

Thanks for all the great advice, smallone. Going to read my books and am TRYING to hire a doula if the woman would ever call me back!!!

Just saw an old friend who couldn't get over how HUGE I am. "are you sure you're not having twins?" hah hah.

Good luck! my hubby says we aren't allowed anymore children unless there is a doula present! He wasn't prepared for all the sleep deprivation during my long labour. (sorry don't want to scare you! - tbh I was fine it was him that looked like he'd given birth at the end of it! )

I was also enormous, even the GP asked if I was sure it wasn't twins ha bloody ha! My bump was measuring for a 9lb2 baby but it ended up being mostly water and even at 41wks she was 8lb5

IME, yes. But I appreciate that there were probably other factors involved.

I thought having the LLL book The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding to hand was brilliant.
Reading it beforehand was no help because you don't really take it in, but it took less time to look up 'engorgement' in the index than it would have done to get answers on MN in the middle of the night.

i think that books are useful, but it depends on the baby in the end. you might end up needing more help than books can give. in my experience it is much easier to have an experienced person look at you nursing your baby and give some suggestions about how to improve latch, positioning etc.
in my case, i had to see quite a few different people before i found one person that could help. i can imagine if i had a different baby who took to the breast easier, then reading a book would have been enough. you just don't know until you're holding that baby in your arms and that's why i feel it is so important to have breastfeeding groups for new mums to go to, and that these groups be advertised to women before they have their babies. my midwife didn't tell me about the local group when i was having terrible problems - i found out from someone at my yoga group. thank goodness for other mums.

ps. good luck diva - i'm guessing youre getting close to due date? if you're in london i know a brilliant doula. i'm not sure if she'd be available for your dates, but worth a try if you don't hear from yours. feel free to CAT me.

Hijack this fab thread - but divaskychick, have you tried finding one from DUK?

Cx

Amberjee - I agree with that, babies and mums are all so different it helps to have a group to go to, to share your feelings and experiences. My HV has just gone on a course to train mums to be peer supporters of BF. I've signed myself up for that already. I'm evangelical about BF now! It was such a struggle for me at the beginning but I got the help I needed to carry on and it makes me sad to think of all the women that give up coz they get the wrong advice or no advice at all.

I think you could learn BF from a book
But it is very useful to have the helpline numbers and preferably details of a BFC or LLL group so you can see someone if you encounter problems

Remember that people who find bf a breeze probably won't be posting about it

smallone - I thought latching the baby for someone was a real no-no. A proper BFC will show you how to latch them yourself

hey smallone, i'm doing that kind of course at the moment to be a peer supporter. i love it. it is really so interesting. i'm exactly the same, had a lot of troubles and am so grateful i got the right kind of help (and lots of it)

blonde, i agree. there's not much point in someone else latching for you because then you wouldn't have the confidence/practice to do it yourself when you're at home alone. i think the most they would/should do if necessary is guide your hand. i'm sure some midwives might grab your boob and shove your LO's head into it though LOL.

Really? oh well it worked for me - I found it helped me see how it should all look when dd was on properly, taught dd how to get the milk out and stopped me getting too sore.

Maybe it was something to do with dd being a reluctant feeder. MW only did it for first day coz dd wouldn't feed - to be fair it probably needed someone to shove it in her mouth, she would probably have prefered someone to suck for her aswell!

i do think for some people it would work. i mean i wouldn't mind, but i'm sure some people would find it intrusive. we learned in the BF peer supporter course though to get the mum to do it themselves so that they feel confident once you leave them to it.

he he. too true.

Depends on the book I suppose but when pg with DS2 I saw an amazing picture of a mother latching her baby on (very explanatory, showed clearly how to hold the baby etc) and suddenly I realised where half of my problems trying to feed DS1 lay.